PP Chapter 22

Octavia's smile fades slightly, and her eyes cloud with sorrow. She takes a step back, her hands fidgeting with unease. "I wish I could say I'm holding up well, Leon. But it's been hard... really hard."

Bellamy and I look at each, not knowing what to say before Bellamy speaks up. "I'm sorry O, but… Clarke... I can't understand why she would make that choice. Leaving Madi behind, leaving you behind, leaving us behind... It doesn't make sense."

Octavia's expression tightens, a flicker of anger crossing her face. "Clarke made her decision, Bellamy. She chooses to abandon us, and most likely doom all of the people in Mount Weather because of that."

Just as I was about to speak up and somehow make Octavia understand why Clarke might have done that, one of the grounders that was nearby, overhearing their conversation, interrupts us, "Blodreina what are we going to do now? "

Octavia sets her jaw, already walking away from her brother and from me together with Indra. "Now we go to war."

As soon as Octavia left us, we saw Miller looking at us and when his eyes caught us, they widen with a mix of excitement and concern as he joins us. "Leon, Bellamy, it's good to see you both," he says relieve to see us again.

I extend my hand towards him, firmly shaking his as I reply, "It's good to see you too, Nate. We've missed you. What's been happening here? And why is Octavia being called Blodreina?"

Miller's expression turns solemn as he takes a deep breath. "It's been... chaotic, to say the least. After the Praimfaya hit, everything went to hell down here. The tribes fought, the Ice Nation wanted to control the bunker, and sadly for them, Octavia assumed control and became the leader everyone needed. But her methods, they've been harsh for a good reason. Blodreina is the name the grounders have given her. It means 'Blood Queen' in Trigedasleng. They see her as a fierce warrior, someone who is willing to shed blood to protect her people."

Bellamy's gaze narrows, his voice tinged with concern about his sister's well-being. "What kind of methods are we talking about?"

Miller hesitates for a moment, choosing his words carefully before whispering to us. "Octavia implemented a strict system of order within the bunker. Every resource was rationed, and every action was monitored. She established a fighting pit, where disputes are settled through brutal battles. It's how she maintained control and kept order among the different clans."

"So, Octavia became their new commander. But at what cost? Is she still the Octavia we knew?"

Miller's gaze flickers with a hint of sadness. "She's changed, Leon. We all have. Life in the bunker was hard, and Octavia had to make tough decisions to ensure our survival. She had to become someone different, someone, strong enough to lead us through the darkness. But... it's taken a toll on her. She missed both of you, a lot"

My heart sinks at Miller's words, realizing the magnitude of the burden Octavia has carried. The thought of her enduring such hardships, transforming into a leader consumed by the darkness of her responsibilities, was something I didn't wish upon anyone. More than five years of brutal fights, of a life filled with death and blood transformed into something we didn't think she could ever become. Thought I find it ironic that I out of all of the people think about Octavia's transformation, and while I was far from a sane, unbroken boy, I didn't kill people for the sake of doing it…

Bellamy's voice trembles with emotion as he speaks, "We have to help her, Leon. She can't bear this burden alone. We need to find a way to bring her back, to remind her of who she truly is."

Miller nods in agreement, his eyes reflecting a shared determination. "Bellamy, you are her family and you've always fought for each other. Octavia needs you now more than ever. "

As we stand there, I begun to remember the first time Octavia and I met and how, despite everything else, she was the first person to greet me and even help me out of my straps. She was the first one to see me as something different than a monster and because of that, I will do whatever it takes to bring Octavia back to the person she once was.

"You are right Bellamy, I won't give up on her," I say firmly, "Octavia is still in there, and we will find a way to break through the walls she's built around herself. Even if that means going against her entire cult."

Looking at Bellamy, I saw how some anxiety passes over his face before we were suddenly right back to where we were before Praimfaya came. Six years spent in three different locations, in space, on the ground, in the bunker, and went up back at war for the last survivable spot on the planet. "We always end up here. A few moments of peace before we wage war. Killing ourselves until no one is left alive."

My words don't alleviate Bellamy's anxiety nor Miller's fear, and when I glance over into the distance at Octavia, I saw her looking back at us despite her ordering the grounders. Maybe this is how the human race will end, we will always be at war, one way or another, unable to live at peace no matter the consequences...

Bellamy's voice carries a hint of resignation as he speaks, his words echoing the weariness we all feel deep within our souls. "It's like we're trapped, Leon. Trapped in this endless cycle of violence and destruction. We try to build something, to find peace, but it always slips through our fingers. We're destined to repeat the same mistakes, over and over again."

"Sadly everything we are doing is for the sake of those that we love," I say softly,. "Yes, the pattern may seem unbreakable, but we have to believe that change is possible. We've seen moments of compassion, unity, and sacrifice throughout the years. And who knows maybe this pattern would one day be broken, long after we have died."

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