Chapter 3

I'm about to graduate. Indeed, ladies and lads, I - Shizuya - am about to officially become a Genin! The past six years have been a rollercoaster of a ride of ups and downs. But! I've survived and evolved to become that awesome being that I am today!

I am currently standing in front of my two teachers, namely, Iruka and Mizuki, the latter of which I really dislike. He has been a dick to Naruto and me from day one, though Blondie never really seemed to notice all of the sabotaging and manipulating that that bastard has been doing. And that fake smile he is constantly wearing is just downright unnerving. Honestly, I feel like there's something important I'm missing but meh, whatever. It couldn't possibly be that bad.

"Hello Shizuya, are you prepared to take your test today?" Iruka-sensei interrupts my thoughts.

"Ah, yes Sensei," I reply.

"Alright, then please make two functional clones," he says, with which I comply. I truly wouldn't want to toot my own horn here, but I'm pretty damn fast at making hand signs if I dare say so myself. So, within less than a second, and with a silent pouf, I had perfect clones of Iruka and Mizuki standing beside me. Both originals smiled at the sight.

"Perfectly done, just as expected, Shizuya. Congratulations! You are now officially a Genin!" Iruka congratulated me.

"Indeed, well done, Shizuya. Now, how about you chose your Hitai-ate?" Mizuki joins in. He may be sus as all heck, but you know what? I couldn't care less at the moment. I'm a real shinobi now!

"Thank you, Iruka-sensei, Mizuki-sensei!" I cheerfully reply before picking a black-colored forehead protector and tying it around my throat.

"If you would please call for Shikamaru on your way out, that would be much appreciated," Iruka says, to which I nod and leave the room. The moment I walk back into the classroom, I almost stumble. The sight before me is... something else, to say the least. Naruto is kissing Sasuke. Not the pairing I would have expected but to each their own. I'm gay myself, so who am I to judge the two's taste, ey? I continue to walk over to my seat. Meanwhile, the female populace of our class decided to gang up on Naruto and beat him into a pulp. Cannot say that I did not see this coming. Sasuke is the most popular boy, after all. But I pay them no mind. None of my classmates pay me any attention either. I'm the cat demon after all. On my way back to my seat, I look at the Nara heir.

"You're up next, Shikamaru."

"What a drag..." He sighs before getting up and walking towards the examination room. I, myself, plop down on my favorite spot in the very last row right next to the window, and some exaggerated stretching later, I am already on my way to dreamland.

~•°•~•°•~•°•~•°•~

Today is the day when we would get sorted into teams. This means that we will get a Jōnin sensei. This also means that I may or may not get some hot eye candy to look at for the foreseeable future. Oh please, God above, do not, under any circumstances, put me in a team with a female Jōnin!

"Listen up!" I'm listening! "First of all, congratulations to all of you for passing. I'm proud to have had a chance to teach you guys during these years. I sincerely hope that all of you will turn into great ninja that our village can be proud of! And without further ado, I will now tell you which of you will form a team together," Iruka said.

"Team 7 - Haruno Sakura, Uzumaki Naruto," Pinkie groans in annoyance while the Blonde goes all "Yatta!", "Uchiha Sasuke," this time the exact opposite reactions, "and, because we have uneven numbers, Shizuya!" No real reaction this time.

"Wait, Iruka-sensei! Why does an exceptional student like me have to be grouped with a slouch like that teme?!" Naruto protests as loud as ever. Just what kind of voice box does this boy have to be able to constantly scream his lungs out? He should consider becoming the vocalist for a metal band. After he's all grown up. Right now his voice is just deadly.

"Because the team needs to be balanced. And since you're the dead last, and Sasuke is in second place, it was decided to put you two together," Iruka explains. I must say, I respect Iruka for his ability to deal with people like Naruto. If it had been me, the knucklehead would've long since been put six feet under. Unfortunately, he and I are on the same team. Oh no, oh dear, how dreadful.

"You just said that Sasuke-kun is in second place. Who is first, then?" Ino, another blonde, and one of the two leading Sasuke fangirls, asks our teacher.

"That would be Shizuya, with a perfect score," is his answer. Immediately all of the girls turn to glare at me. Sorry bitches, I can't help my awesomeness.

"Just don't get in my way, loser," Sasuke says to Naruto, which angers the blonde.

"What did you just say?!" He explodes at the ravenette.

"You want to fight, loser?" The Uchiha taunts.

"Naruto, knock it off!" Sakura hisses at the knucklehead. With the blonde now silent, Iruka can finally continue.

"Team 8 will be Hyuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba, and Aburame Shino. Team 10 will be Yamanaka Ino, Nara Shikamaru, and Akimichi Choji. Your Jōnin sensei will come and get you in the afternoon. Again, congratulations! You are dismissed!" I can finally go take a nap since everybody else is probably going to leave and grab some lunch. As such, I use my instant sleep ability to cut myself off from reality the moment my head hits the table.

~•°•~•°•~•°•~•°•~

He is late.

Who, you may ask? Well, who else but our resident sexy beast of a man by the name of Hatake Kakashi. I'm so lucky to have him as my Jōnin sensei. Ah~ the gods must've heard my desperate prayers and taken pity upon my sad and lonely ass. I mean, have you seen the guy? He is every gay man's wet dream come to life! Mine included. Oh gosh, I hope I won't start drooling the moment I lay my eyes upon him. Or get a hard-on for that matter. That would make for a rather awkward first impression.

"Stop it, Naruto! You're going to get into trouble!" I hear the pink banshee screech. Ah, yes, the eraser prank. How could I have forgotten.

"That's his punishment for being late!" Naruto proudly exclaims, earning himself an annoyed eye roll from both Sakura and Sasuke.

"As if he would fall for something like that. He's a Jōnin after all." Sasuke says.

"Sasuke is right, Naruto. There's no way this is going to work." Sakura adds, crossing her arms in front of her chest as she leans against the table behind her. But from her expression, I would say that she secretly supports Naruto's idea. But! The joke's on you, Kakashi will get hit. Albeit willingly since he's too lazy to dodge, but still. And then it happened. While Naruto is still arguing with Sakura, the door opens and the eraser plops on a mop of gravity-defying, silver hair. It looks so fluffy... I really wanna pet him. And I wanna know his haircare routine. That amount of fluff is insane!

"How should I put this... My first impression of you guys...? Well, I hate you. Come to the rooftop. Now." he drawls and shunshins away. I wanna learn how to do that, too! That's so cool! I hope he'll teach me. Ah, but before that, I should probably get my ass into gear and go to the roof. My favorite place after my bed. And so, with practiced agility and fluidity like only a cat could muster, I climb out of the window and up along the outside wall, all the way to the top. And even though I started after the others had already left, I somehow manage to arrive before them. Kakashi just looks at me weirdly.

"Ever heard of stairs?" He asks.

"Stairs are for civilians," I deadpan.

"True that."

Just a few seconds later, the door bursts open and my other teammates arrive. Naruto glances at me visibly confused.

"How come you're already here?" He asks. Sasuke and Sakura both seem to have the same question.

"I climbed up the outside wall," I answer as I lazily make myself comfortable in a particularly sunny spot on the ground and close my eyes. "Besides, you guys are much slower than I am, anyway," I then add.

"Hey!-" Naruto starts yelling but gets interrupted by Kakashi. "Ma~, calm down. How about we start by introducing ourselves."

"Introduce ourselves? What are we supposed to say?" Sakura asks our teacher.

"Your likes, dislikes, your future dreams, hobbies, things like that." He answers.

"How about you start with an example, Sensei?" She proposes.

"Me? My name is Hatake Kakashi. I don't feel like telling you guys about my likes and dislikes. As for my future dream? Never really thought about it. And hobbies? I have many." Kakashi introduces himself. A sad introduction, really. He must've had a hard life.

"He said so many things, yet in the end, we know nothing other than his name," Sakura grumbles, to which Naruto agrees with a nod. And that's why you're nothing but ignorant children. If you had read between the lines then you would've gotten a lot more information. Either way, the moment Kakashi tells Naruto to introduce himself, I disconnect from reality. That brat's voice is pure torture so I'd rather not listen to it if I can avoid it, thank you very much. But eventually, it's my turn.

"And last but not least, you, cat boy," Kakashi says as he points at me, bringing me back from my thoughts.

"Right, uh, the name's Shizuya, am an orphan. I like naps and warm weather, I dislike a whole slew of things that'd be a pain to list up. Dreams? I see no point in dreaming when the future is a bitch that changes its mind more often than Naruto can mention ramen. As for hobbies... eh, since I'm sleeping most of the day, I ain't got much time for anything else." Yup, that's me. Plain ole Shizuya. Nothing much to see here, moving on.

"Heh, you guys seem to be an interesting bunch. Anyway, we'll have a mission tomorrow." Kakashi states with disinterest thick in his voice. I wonder if this mystery mother of his was a Nara. He has their laziness and disinterest down pat.

"What kind of mission?!" Naruto gets all excited.

"A survival exercise."

"We've had our fair share of those exercises in the academy!" Naruto huffs in disappointment.

"It isn't just some random survival exercise. This one determines whether you are going to be real Genin or if you are going to be sent back to the academy." Sensei drops a bomb on us. So it's less of an exercise and more of a final test, gotcha. Guess I will have to actually try this time. I don't think I could survive another round in the academy.

"HUH?!" Naruto and Sakura exclaim in shock, even Sasuke looks the part. Why don't they shout any louder? I don't think the dudes over in Kumogakure have heard them.

"What? Did you honestly believe that you are full-fledged Genin? No. The exam was only there to weed out the useless stragglers. It's up to us Jōnin to test you and decide whether you are fit to walk the path of a true Shinobi or not. As such, we will meet at five in the morning. Don't forget to bring all of your gear. Oh, and refrain from eating breakfast. You'll only end up puking it all out anyways. See you tomorrow!" And just like that he vanishes. Sasuke also decides to not stay any longer than necessary. Sakura being Sakura, tries to get him to spend some time with her. Obviously, the answer is a clear "no". And Naruto then offers to take her out for ramen instead. Also a clear "no". Neither of them even thinks of talking to me. That kinda hurts, not gonna lie. But oh well, since we're a team now, we will have to spend a decent amount of time together, whether we like it or not. Things are gonna get plenty interesting in the future, I'm sure.