"This must be some kind of a new record." Tsunade's cold stare landed on the fidgeting Anko who was currently standing in front of her table and giving a report about the genin test of Team Seven. "Let me get this straight. Not even a day has passed and your entire team is out of commission? You have not finished even one D-rank mission yet but four out of five members of your team are already in the hospital?"
"It's not my fault!" Anko defended herself, crossing her arms under her chest with a pout while averting her eyes from Tsunade's steel-like gaze.
"Not your fault?" Tsunade repeated with a hint of disbelief in the undertone of her voice. "Hmm... Let's see," Tsunade took a file from her table, flipping it open, and started narrating, "Uchiha Sasuke, broken right hand and left leg, multiple cracked ribs, several torn muscles, concussion... It goes on." Tsunade glanced at Anko who grimaced. "Even with our medics tending to him, he will be out of commission for a week."
"Uh... It's not the worst he has had so far?" Anko weakly tried, getting a snort from Tsunade.
"Hinata Hyuuga," Tsunade continued, "Also cracked several ribs, mild burns on her arms, chakra exhaustion... Well, she got off lightly. Praiseworthy result considering Kakashi was going at them quite seriously. Still, she will be in hospital for three days at the very least."
Anko's eyes slightly widened when she heard that. Tsunade just basically admitted she was watching the whole thing! Needless to say, Anko got even quieter, knowing no amount of Bullshit no Jutsu could save her now.
"Naruto Uzumaki... Well, not important." Tsunade hummed, "He is already healed and is only detained in the hospital for observation because he had burns on his internal organs from Kakashi's lightning ass poke."
Anko's eyebrow twitched at that. She remembered that scene and couldn't help but try hard at stifling a chuckle. Her good mood quickly ceased when Tsunade warningly narrowed her eyes at her.
"And the best one... Kakashi Hatake." Tsunade gave Anko an accusatory look, "Broken both knees, broken right arm in five different places, broken left arm at the forearm, shattered ribs, concussion, torn muscles at multiple places... you know what? Let's just say the man was basically dismantled alive. You wouldn't know something about that, would you, Anko-chan?" Tsunade asked in a sweet coaxing tone and Anko shivered.
"I... I might have gone a bit too far in our spar." Anko slumped her shoulders, admitting her wrongdoings.
"Spar?" Tsunade lifted an eyebrow at the wording, "Anko... Sparring matches do not end with your opponent having to spend two weeks in the hospital eating through a straw."
"I wouldn't know. I sparred only with you for the last few years..." Anko petulantly mumbled, causing the corner of Tsunade's lips to twitch in amusement.
"Haa~, what am I going to do with you..." Tsunade rubbed the bridge of her nose while secretly smirking. This was exactly why Anko was never considered for the position of the next Hokage by Tsunade despite being the second strongest ninja currently in the village. "Just go and report for duty in a week when your genins are healed. Your team will be without jonin until Kakashi gets better."
"Understood." Anko nodded, knowing this meant she would have to supervise D-ranks. For the first time since it happened, Anko regretted roughing Kakashi up. This was basically punishment in itself!
"Dismissed." Tsunade said, returning to her paperwork while Anko left with a dejected sigh.
Tsunade was signing papers when she suddenly offhandedly spoke, "You can stop, Kurenai. Your genjutsu is fooling no one. Even Anko noticed you."
The air above the couch suddenly shimmered, revealing Kurenai sitting there, frowning at being discovered so easily. "One day... I swear that one day I will catch you off-guard, sensei." She muttered, causing Tsunade to shake her head in exasperation.
'Not likely. My Senjutsu senses are impossible to fool with a genjutsu.' Tsunade thought, keeping that bit to herself. "So, how was your team?" She asked.
Kurenai proudly beamed, "They are incredible! Yakumo is such a great talent in genjutsu! She will no doubt become the next Konoha's Genjutsu Mistress! During the test, she managed to catch me for a second in such an incredibly intricate..."
Tsunade half-listened, half-ignored the enthusiastic bragging veiled as a report while trying to find out what did she do to deserve this kind of torture. She was a taijutsu expert. She had no idea what half of the things Kurenai was talking about meant. Half an hour passed like this and Tsunade finished half of her daily quota of paperwork while Kurenai didn't stop talking even for a second.
"... and then there is Shino!" Hearing the name, Tsunade decided to pay a bit more attention in-between her paperwork since the excruciating genjutsu-describing part was mostly over. "His bug techniques are good but he will need more training in taijutsu. Er... Sensei?" Kurenai shyly started.
"Yeah?" Tsunade boredly asked, already aware of what her student will ask next.
"Could you... perhaps... give me some advice on how to help Shino with taijutsu? I have can give him basic exercises but... well... you are the expert here so I thought I would ask... uh... if it's no problem..." Kurenai averted her gaze, hoping her mentor would help her student.
Tsunade found Kurenai's eagerness when it came to genjutsu bothersome but this was the reason why she decided to groom Kurenai into the next Hokage. Despite all of her faults, the woman simply cared in a special kind of way.
"Haa~," Tsunade sighed, giving Kurenai a fed-up glance before she threw a scroll at her. "There are exercises for both Aburame and Inuzuka. So? How is the last member of your team? Chop-chop, I don't have the whole day for your report, Kurenai."
"Ah... Kiba." Kurenai's voice lost all enthusiasm. "He is a pervert." She deadpanned, causing Tsunade to snicker. "I honestly have no idea why you gave him to me when you know how I don't like these kinds of people." She complained.
"Exactly because of that." Tsunade admitted, "This will be a learning experience for both you and Kiba. There is no better teacher than you as far as curbing his more Inuzuka-ish nature goes and there is no better student than Kiba as far as training your patience is concerned. You will be good for each other."
Needless to say, Tsunade inwardly laughed at the conflicted and unwilling expression on Kurenai's face. Alas, being a Hokage meant being a politician, and being a politician meant dealing with all kinds of unsavory people. This was just the start of preparing Kurenai for her future. Then again, Tsunade couldn't really explain that to the woman since she didn't even tell her she will be the next Hokage yet.
"I already want to strangle the mutt..." Kurenai quietly mumbled. She was very eager to teach all three of her students. She heard about Kiba's nature before she even met him, and she was willing to give him a chance. She didn't mind his not-so-discreet looks. If that was the extent of how annoying he was, she would have been fine with that.
The problem was his loud mouth and desire to be the alpha of the team. Kiba was too rash to be a leader. Unfortunately, Shino was too smart to argue with Kiba, knowing it is pointless and Yakumo couldn't care less. As such, Kiba tried to command the team, breaking the superb teamwork between Yakumo and Shino apart rather than trying to insert himself into it in a meaningful way.
"Well, it's just the first day. I am sure you will get used to his antics." Tsunade smiled, remembering her own time as a genin. It took quite a lot of beatings until Jiraiya stopped being so obvious about his pervertedness near her. "Dismissed."
Kurenai grumbled something inaudible under her nose before leaving Tsunade's office.
'Sometimes I wonder why I even bothered taking in apprentices.' Tsunade inwardly mused, deciding to quickly finish her paperwork.