What does a book know?

[Tuesday, Registration]

"You are walking in a forest and notice an untouched field of wildflowers. How many do you take?" Ethan read from a magazine.

"This is stupid. I'll just take 5 I guess." I said. "What about you, Sean?"

"Hmmm… Since it's untouched I won't take any."

"Let's see what this means."

In case you want to know what is going on, before leaving School Ethan was forced to talk to his younger sister. During that talk, she mentioned some stupid love magazine that asks you questions and tells you what it thinks. Some dumb personality test or whatever. Ethan seemed worryingly interested to the point where he stole the magazine from his sister's room last night.

"The number of flowers taken shows how much you love, or will love, your partner."

"So 5? I'll love my partner a bit. I guess 5 is a bit?"

"But I took none?" Sean said.

"It says that taking none means your love is infinite. You prefer true beauty and wish for nothing to be changed and the amount of love you have to give will never die."

Pffft. What a load of bull. Although I can imagine that from Sean.

"Well, that was a boring question. Shall we move on to the next one?" Ethan said not even answering them himself.

"Think of a number between 1 and 100."

Ok… I'll go for 57 I guess.

"That is the number of partners you will have in your lifetime." Ethan read it over again to make sure he was reading it correctly. He even passed it to me and Sean to check.

I'm pretty sure this could only be possible through illegal means. But 57 partners. Will I really?

"What numbers did you guys say?" He asked.

"I only said 2," Sean said.

"Owen? What about you?"

"Oh, you know. 3 was what I said. Nothing interesting."

"Alright. Let's move on!"

How many more does he have?

"Pick a colour for a plain T-shirt. Dark blue, Dark red, Dark Green or black."

What the hell is a T-shirt going to tell us? I'm kinda interested in how stupid this is.

"I'll go for Dark blue," I said.

"Dark blue." Ethan looked for the answer. "People that pick Dark blue often enjoy peaceful environments and shine best when alone, although they act this way they value time with others."

Ethan and Sean looked at me, believing every word the book says.

"That's nothing like me."

"It is," Sean said confirming for me.

"I can see it," Ethan added.

"HOW!" I said defending myself. "I'M NOT LIKE THAT!"

"Calm down, dude. It's ok. We love you for who you are." Ethan said attempting to pat me on the head.

"I'd pick Dark Green," Sean said.

"Dark green people enjoy their friends and family. They surround themselves with people that will love them for who they are and will never betray them. Dark green people will go their whole life receiving endless amounts of love."

"Ugh," I said. "I hate that I can see Sean in that."

"Really? I don't see it?" Ethan dared question it.

"HOW! HOW CAN YOU SEE THE BLUE IN ME BUT NOT THE GREEN IN SEAN!"

"Alright calm down. Let's move on." Ethan was trying to change the topic. He wanted to move on as quickly as he could.

"NO!" I screamed snatching the magazine out of his hand.

"This time I'll read one for you! Let's see here." I flicked through the pages as quickly as I could trying to find the juiciest one that would expose him for who he is.

"Ah! Here we go!"

"Let's hear it." He was surprisingly calm about what was about to come.

"You are walking in the woods. There is no one around and your phone is... No, this one sucks. Hang on."

I continued to flip as fast as I could. Scanning each page and reading the answer instead of the question. Maybe I should just make one up? Will he notice?

"You come across several animals up for adoption. Which one do you take: A turtle, A cat, A dog, A parrot or a pig"

Hehehe. My plan is foolproof. By making one up I can trick him into getting embarrassed and expose him.

"Oh, the animal one. I've done that already. Pick another one." Ethan said.

Wait. That was an actual question in this magazine? I flicked through again looking for it. I couldn't find it anywhere. Does he perhaps know I made it up? Is he testing me?

His face wasn't giving anything away. He looked blankly into his phone. He must be testing me.

I guess I'll pick one from the magazine.

"You are stuck in a river. There are several options you can use to cross the river. Which one do you use: A small damaged raft, A luxurious yacht, or a small rowboat."

The two of them spent a few minutes thinking about it. Much longer than they should be taking.

"Have you looked at the answers yet, Owen?" Ethan asked.

"No, why?"

"We should all pick for this one." He suggested.

Dammit. I knew he was up to something. He must have spent hours looking through this magazine last night learning all the questions and answers. He planned this all. He knew what questions I would ask and all of it. He's secretly a genius. I should have looked at the answers to this question but he outsmarted me.

"I'll go rowboat then," I said defeated. I have no hope left in this world. I could only accept the embarrassment that was to come.

"Raft for me!" Sean said.

"What a coincidence. We all have different answers. I would pick the yacht."

This was it. I've lost to him again. He calculated and played me from the start. Whatever this is he knew I would pick the rowboat. Whatever he was after he has gotten it.

"The raft. If you pick the raft you like danger and like to try new things. You are outgoing and survive best in new environments."

"That does seem like Sean," Ethan added.

"Yacht. You enjoy the safety and comfort of what is most familiar to you. Although you aren't too keen on change, you try to accept it the best you can."

That one does seem like Ethan.

And here it is. Whatever this is, is going to expose me. This book must be from the gods; made to expose us for who we truly are. Made to make us angry at ourselves and see our lives from another point of view. What a cruel trick. What kinda psycho would make me want to expose my true nature like this?

"The rowboat. You enjoy life at your own pace. You follow your own journey and help anyone and everyone by guiding them. Although you help others more than you help yourself you wish someone would return the favour."

"Aw. isn't that cute," Ethan said, smugly. It was as if he was looking at an adorable kitten. But I'm not that, I'm meant to be a fierce beast.

'How embarrassing' I kept thinking to myself. Who would have guessed a simple magazine would have told exposed me like this? I want to die of embarrassment.

"I don't know why you are embarrassed," Sean said. "I think it's cool how accurate it got us all. Plus I've always known those things about each of you. I didn't learn anything new. I guess I did about myself though."

"Yeah, that's true. I was hoping to find something interesting out from both of you but it was already stuff I knew."

What? That was his plan? They already knew? So I won? Did I win?

"Of course!" I said sitting back up full of energy. "We all knew these things, to begin with. What a stupid little game." I said throwing the magazine away.

"Hey, don't throw that away, that's my sister's."