Bitter Wine. Bitter Love

WEI LI LIAN

YIYUAN

Li Lian did not have any expectations reserved concerning what reaction Yuwen Hong would have, though his neutral expression surprised her.

"Eunuch Nam?"

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"Serve me the antidote."

An antidote was meant to nullify poison. This meant the food he ate was poisoned. What she thought was childish play had been his contemplation at having her dead. Yuwen Hong almost had her dead. She hurriedly wiped her lip where the crayfish brushed.

Eunuch Nam rushed in with an antidote, a small bottle Yuwen Hong gulped in one go.

If it was bitter, his face did not show it. "Leave us."

The eunuch then took the tray with the poisoned food and left.

Oppressive silence consumed the room which made Li Lian weary. "I always wondered where you were but I couldn't look for you," she tried to explain herself.

"Why couldn't you?"

She wasn't prepared to tell him she was confined by Mistress Kei to concentrate on her training. "I was forced to spend my time preparing to be the emperor's concubine for my clan."

"Is that so?" His tone resonated disbelief.

"But I didn't want to be the emperor's concubine because my heart longed for you. That is why when I was made to dance I only asked to be a palace maid. I'd rather be nothing in this world than belong to another man that was not you. Well, that was when I was not aware that you are the emperor himself."

The other day Li Lian verged that she would not serve anyone. She would be herself, but now as she spouted lie after lie, she realized that no matter what she tried―somewhere, some other day, she had lost herself. What she knew was to be the woman she was taught to be; calculative, cunning and deceptive.

He laughed. It was a hollow pained laugh he gave as he fisted his hands. "What a waste," he finished. "To think that I yearned for you and beat myself up over you. What a waste."

Li Lian noted that he did not acknowledge to her whether he was indeed the emperor. "I don't understand what you mean."

"Pathetic liar!" His eyes raged as his hand smashed the wooden table, wedging a hole through it. "You dare take me as stupid."

She fell back in panic, stopping her fall by resting on her two hands behind her.

He flipped over the small table, the force sending it to plummet at the far end.

Outside, the sky roared indicating the oncoming thunderstorm. It also accelerated the tension that thickened the air. "Good. The sky will cry the tears I can't shed today," his voice was raw.

The Elora she was back then clearly left a huge footprint on him than she imagined.

He stood and took a wine bottle that was by his cabinet. He took a swig directly from the bottle. "So what were you thinking I would do if you told me you are Elora?" Another sip. "That I would not kill you?"

She quickly shook her head. "I have always been a truthful person. I had no such intentions." In the back of her mind she was begging that he spare her and not crash her head with the clay bottle of wine.

He grinned. "I don't care what you are or not." It was her first time to see his eyes blazing with anger at her. "You are not the same innocent thing I fell for. You are villainous, cunning and evil. Every word that comes from your mouth is a lie. What happened to you?"

He caught her off guard with his sharp piercing words. In them was the truth. Who was she now? "Maybe I have always been this way from the start. You just failed to see it from behind the veil of love-sickness."

His eyebrows scrunched and he chuckled. "Ugly. You are the ugliest thing I have ever encountered. Your venom is what sickens me."

Yuwen Hong looked down at her in disgust, she felt like recoiling back to the side room and covering herself in her discarded clothes. She indeed felt like dirt.

"Did you..." Whatever he was about to say seemed stuck on his throat. "Did you ever love me?"

He was her beloved. In her heart he had always been her beloved route to escape her constricting life. But love?

It was a stretch.

He went on to interrogate further. "Like man and woman. Did you ever love me?"

She looked at him uncertainly.

"You know? That kind of love Elora... love at first sight?"

Li Lian remembered the long nights she cried. She did not moan over him as much. Instead, she cried at the prospect that they would send her away to be locked away in a palace to battle in the harem for a nonsensical emperor's attention.

Bothered by her non-response, he grovelled for her affection. "At least something. Adoration? Crush? A liking?"

She shook her head with regret. What was love? Was it the sweet feeling she had when Nameless cared for her? Or was it Mistress Kei beating her to be better? For her after all, hate was a familiar fortress than love was.

"Then what did you feel?" He growled, crashing the wine bottle on the wall. "Are you telling me for years I had unrequited love?"

"I don't know. I don't know." She winced backwards covering herself. If her face was marked with a scar she would amount to nothing.

"What don't you know? What about you wanting to marry me? If you like lying, why not lie about your feelings for me? Let me not be in unrequited love!"

She was everything bad, but seeing him hurt affected her too. "Duibuqi..." (sorry)

"Shut up!" He crumbled on his knees. It was culturally despicable to see a man on his knees, especially an emperor, one who was not meant to bow for anyone. This act was done by men who had lost at war, stripped off and left with nothing on their land. Li Lian felt sore to think that this was probably what he was experiencing. He wailed in agony, though tears were not on his cheeks. In great turmoil he beat his chest, gasping for air.

"Yuwen Hong..." she began to crawl to him in an attempt to comfort him.

His body shook with the anger that possessed him like the devil. "Don't touch me!" he yelled.

"I'm sorry!"

"What are you sorry for?"

"Yuwen Hong, I did not want to be this way." She crept to him and held onto his arm. "Whatever you want, tell me. I will do it. I will heal your broken heart. Just tell me what you need of me."

He shook his head.

"Please tell me." She hugged his crouched body and carelessly, he shoved her away accidentally hitting her on her forehead.

"I will love you if you ask me to. Learn to at whatever cost. Please just don't be this angry." She was back by his side, hugging him and not caring about the swelling on her forehead. Thankfully, he did not push her away but melted in her embrace. He then sat down and took her into his arms, his beautiful scent welcoming her.

She rubbed his back solemnly for a while until he stopped being emotional. This was when he released her and sat her from him.

"Summon the scribe for me," he instructed those who were outside.

Li Lian was not sure what this was about, yet when his cold empty eyes caught hers; she knew it was not good.

A man in official clothing came in a few minutes later and bowed. Ink, brushes and a scroll were at his disposal.

"Write this down," he purposely gazed into her eyes, and this made the words that he said next feel like hot coal on her head. "Wei Li Lian sought to seduce the emperor. This wanton behavior is disgraceful. I demote her from a palace maid to a commoner, not to enter the palace ever again."

S.V