Qualifications

Quest Updated: A Stranger in a Strange Land.

Completed: Speak with the Boss Summon.

Meet the Emperor at the East Shore.

"So, I'm a little confused," I started as the two of us arrived at the shore.

"About what?" Yujiro asked, standing up straight.

"So…Sea Lions and Sharks have both allied with Fish to stop you from eating them," I asked for clarification.

"So, you were listening!" Yujiro grinned.

"But…Sea Lions eat Fish and Sharks eat Fish, and they've all allied together to fight the Penguin clan because you eat fish," I summed up, ignoring the barb. "And Sharks also eat Sea Lions, so the alliance makes even less sense."

"And so, you have stumbled upon one of our biggest problems," Yujiro nodded as if he were impressed. "The Alliance came out of nowhere and we haven't been able to figure it out."

"Another thing," I said. "I can understand the Fish wanting you dead, but why would the Sharks care? And Sea Lions already eat Penguins anyway, why make war on you?"

"Oh, you are a smart one," Yujiro said, nodding appreciatively. "So, here's the gist – shark is delicious, and Sea Lion's grace our tables as a form of righteous justice upon their hides."

I was quiet. I thought about this for one for a good, long while as Yujiro's smile got wider and wider. "You're kidding."

"Nope!" Yujiro grinned even further. "We figured, all those years ago, that they've been eating us for long enough, that we should see how it looks on the other side of the ice berg."

"I…uh…" He has to be kidding. "I...don't believe you."

"No? Come on, you should try some shark some time…sure, if you don't prepare it right it's really tough but if you stick it down near those volcanic vents they love so much, you can get it so tender it slides off the cartilage," Yujiro licked his beak. "And sea-lions…well. We like eating them for the same reason the fish are trying to kill us – turnabout is fair play."

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about this. "So, you guys were apparently powerful enough to get Shark and Sea Lion served on your dinner table…your natural predators, I might add, and this ticked them off enough that they allied against you."

"Yup!" Yujiro replied. "Speaking of volcanic vents, that's where you're going, actually."

Violations of natural law that I had no right to complain about aside, I blinked. "There's a volcanic vent nearby?"

"There is!" Yujiro replied. "But we should wait for the Emperor to meet us before we go further."

It only took a few moments before the Emperor penguin, massive thing that he was, created a small tidal wave that washed over us as he broke through the sheets of ice before us.

Quest Updated: Stranger in a Strange Land.

Completed: Meet the Emperor at the East Shore.

Speak with the Emperor.

"Now, Shimoda," The Emperor turned to face me, a fierce gale of winds accompanying every sway of his head. "Approximately a quarter league from here on the bottom of the ocean lies a volcanic fissure, created by the sharks. They've been using it as a resting point for their forces in between patrols around the island."

That makes sense. Sharks have problems breathing while they're not in motion but a volcanic fissure alleviates that problem by keeping the water moving. I would normally raise my eyebrow about a volcanic fissure this close to a frozen island without melting it, but I'm unfamiliar with ocean geography and that could possibly be normal. Or not, because Jutsu shenanigans.

"Your mission is to kill them all," The Emperor summed up. "There should be around 50, should our scouting prove accurate. But you'll be going in alone."

"I see," I replied. That didn't bother me in the slightest, but curiosity did linger. "No backup?"

"This is a test," The Emperor replied with a smirk. "You're a Shinobi from a village – if you're going to be worth anything substantial in this war of ours, this should be easy."

"Understood," I nodded.

"Yujiro will handle any remaining questions," The Emperor said, turning to look at the sea. "I'm just here to watch."

Completed: Meet the Emperor at the East Shore.

Kill the Sharks: 0/46 remaining.

(Optional): Speak to Yujiro.

Well…optional objectives give me EXP. I think.

You know the worst part about any quest is? When it forces you to talk to someone annoying to complete it. It just drags on you because there's a million other things you'd like to do than talk to this one irritating, insultingly obnoxious NPC that you have to talk too to complete the quest and…you know what, I think skipping a bonus objective is okay just this once.

I attempted to dive into the water, only to feel something stuck to my back and pull me back.

You know what drives me even nuttier? False choice. It's optional to talk to this person-oops, just kidding! You have to talk to them!

"So, hold on a second…" Yujiro pulled me back really quickly and wrapped one of his flippers around my shoulders. "What's your plan?"

"Dive in, reduce sharks to chum," I rose my eyebrow. "Why?"

"…okay, you know what? Imma do you a solid," Yujiro said, bringing the other flipper up to gesture to the ocean. "When you think of shark, what do you think about?"

"I giant hole lined by teeth trying to devour me," I replied, deadpan. "With abnormally vulnerable gills."

"Right, right," Yujiro nodded. "Sit down and answer a question for me."

I growled, but complied with the request as he drew a shark in the snow in front of me.

"So when you look at that," Yujiro said as he finished the drawing. "What do you notice is missing?"

"Missing?" I blinked. I looked at him for further clarification, but he just grinned and narrowed his eyes. I looked at the picture, which had a normal shark on it, with nothing missing. "There's nothing missing from the picture."

"Of course, not, it's a perfectly healthy shark," Yujiro nodded. "But it's lacking a fairly useful tool that would let it do lots of cool stuff."

I blinked. Come on, Daisuke. Use your brain…think. Think…think…wait… "Shark Clan means it's a clan of Ninja-summons, right?"

"If by 'Ninja' you mean 'they're summoned by Ninja' then yes," Yujiro nodded. "They're more like Samurai themselves."

"…they don't have hands," I blinked at the picture. "Which…means they can't use traditional jutsu."

"Exactly," Yujiro looked satisfied, hopping back on its flippers and using…it's clawed feet…to strike a facsimile of the bird hand sign. "While we can…yet they're tossing us around like krill feed for babies. What does that tell you?"

I took a breath and…then sighed. "They're masters of interpersonal combat."

"Which means what for you, if you just dive in there, fists flying?" Yujiro's smile had only gotten wider.

I grit my teeth.

"Well?" Yujiro asked cheerfully.

"They'll kill me," I finally answered. Why did it have to be this joker to give me the humility pill?

"They'll eat you faster than a bleeding seal," Yujiro's smile disappeared. "Don't get me wrong. You're good, kid. But you're not that good. But, you know…if you want to just dive in there, fists flying, I won't stop you. You might even get out alive. But the better the plan, the better the rewards at the end, right?"

I took a breath. "Right."

Fine, whatever. I can come up with a plan.

"Good to hear it," Yujiro nodded and got out of the way.

"Quick question," I still frowned. "How'd they make a volcanic vent without jutsu."

"Presumably, they had help from somewhere," Yujiro replied with a shrug. "We don't know where, though…but I wouldn't worry about that right now."

Quest Updated: A Stranger in a Strange Land.

Completed: (Optional): Speak to Yujiro.

I stood up. What was the main problem I had fighting the Behemoth? I kept missing with my best weapon against him – Depth Charges, something that really should've been an instant win condition. My best guess was that I didn't have enough explosive power behind them.

How to remedy that problem?

Use a bigger bomb. Preferably something that still sinks quickly.

I stood up and turned around. Behind the shore was a large boulder, about eight feet tall and would take ten clones to join hands and circle it. It was perfect. Dozens of times larger than my lightning-based depth charges and with a proportionally larger explosion!

The challenge is floating it out there. I wonder if I can seal an object away from the worlds gravity? Or rather, just part of the objects mass from the rest of the universe. I mean, seals can do lots of weird, conceptual stuff like seal away a person's ability to tell secrets, memories, locations…partially sealing away parts of this stone's mass should be possible…

Fuinjutsu Check Success: 76/75.

+1200 exp.

Well, that was actually a challenge, but as the seal-work wrote itself across the rock, I felt a remarkable feeling of accomplishment. To make it better, I gleefully lifted this giant boulder above my head with one hand.

2395 more EXP to go and I'm not entirely sure Ninjutsu is even relevant as a skill with Fuinjutsu taking care of all my problems like this.

I'm kidding. Mostly.

With that…what, about a quarter of a league? That's not too far. Shunshin'd out there as fast as I can until I was reasonably sure that I had reached directly above my destination. I felt a chill in my stomach as I looked around, and didn't see anything…beneath the ocean, I couldn't see anything either. I put my head beneath the waves and thankfully didn't see any murderous shark things anywhere near me.

Far below the ocean, however, I saw…something. A faint orange glow right beneath me. I was indeed over the target. Over it there seemed to be small shapes, wisps of shadow that I only knew where sharks thanks to my objective. Yeah. They were there.

Okay, so…let's go with as much power as I could put in this thing. I brought the rock down and with my other hand, I made several hand signs and then slammed my palm on the boulder, watching as a kiloton of explosive power wrote itself across the surface of the rock…then I wrote a variation of my communication seal to act as a trigger.

It was no nuclear bomb, as much as I wanted it to be, but it would get the job done. With my work done, I released the seal making the boulder light and it crashed through the ocean floor, nearly taking me with it before I released it.

The waves calmed down and I kept a vigil, staring at the boulder as it sunk, going down further and further, doing calculations in my head so as to know when the right time to detonate my bomb, while also making sure I didn't get anything on the surface attacking me. I was told patrols would come by here, I didn't want to be caught out by one.

My foot started tapping as my anxiety started to increase. I could be caught out. I seriously doubt Penguins haven't tried simply skimming on the surface of the water…I did not feel like getting eaten alive again. The alternative was even worse.

Then, the time came…I set off the bomb. The water all the way up here splashed and a series of waves rocked the surface with me atop them.

Quest Update: A Stranger in a Strange Land.

Kill the Sharks: 45/46.

+4500 EXP.

Holeeee…

…no level up screen. There's one survivor.

I'm in combat.

Crap.

Whereisitwhereisitwhereisitwhere…

Perception Check Success: 8/4.

I shunshin'd to the side as the shark burst out of the water in an attempt to chomp on me, water sticking to his fins and lengthening them like knives. It corkscrewed in mid-air, it's water-wins adjusting orientation to slice downward and making me back up even further to avoid my head getting sliced open…at this point, I doubt it would be immediately lethal but crippled heads sucked more than crippled torsos.

Depth Charges.

Plural. It was a lightning jutsu I devised, as it was literally a scattering of lightning balls that sprinkled from my hand and dove into the water before exploding in a flash of electricity and thunder. Once all the charges I could spare were in the water, I started moving again.

I barely dodged a water-blade from the shark's top fin and I sprayed another helping of depth charges beneath me. But they didn't catch him…they weren't working. He was fast enough to simply move out of my range and move back when the charges had detonated. It was likely the same tactic the Behemoth used.

That meant wait until I got a good visual, and since I only get a visual when he's close to the surface, that meant wait until he attacked. I hated waiting. It felt like wasting time, but I wasn't so suicidal as to charge into the water…if I couldn't see the shark now, I wouldn't be able to see it in the water and I preferred to have a place to retreat to.

Perception Check Success: 8/3.

He charged from the front while I was looking to the side.

Zeus.

The lightning bolt flew from my fingers while I shunshin'd backwards and it ran right into the things mouth, causing it to cackle with electricity and stop moving for just a second.

Zeus!

Zeus!

Zeus!

+100 EXP.

Zeus!

Zeus!

Zeus!

Wait, it's dead.

Ques Updated: A Stranger in a Strange Land.

Completed: Kill the Sharks.

Bum-bum-bum-Bum!

Level up!

Level 17.

I just dumped all 23 points into Fuinjutsu. It was incredibly useful, broken as crap and frankly the key behind 'enchanting' my armor to allow for superior buffs. I wasn't going to die anytime soon. However, that left my Fuinjutsu at 99, so I'd need one more level before I maxed it out.

Only 4545 more until level 18 and the Water element. Awesome.

Speak with the Emperor Penguin.

I sped back to the shore, the Emperor watched me as I approached. Then he smiled. "That…was a most excellent strategy. I'm pleased you actually took Yujiro's advice...the last applicant we had to get this far didn't do that, preferring his tried and true ice Jutsu. While he did well, he was still overwhelmed. But you succeeded, something I applaud. Congratulations…you're hired."

"Thank you, Emperor-sama," I bowed in respect. "I appreciate the chance I had to prove myself."

"And we are very pleased to have you aboard," The Emperor said. "That outpost was the furthest they have encroaching on our territory. I'll have the squad I had assembled handle any additional demolition work, but I doubt that'll be necessary. Since you are undoubtedly here without the knowledge of your superior officers, I assume you'll be needing to go back to the leaf?"

"Not necessarily," I replied. "I had an eight-hour window when I arrived. I've been here for approximately three of those hours, so I should be good."

"I see," the Emperor replied. "Alas, the next major action we'll need you for won't be ready for another day…will you be here once again at the same time you arrived? That would be perfect for us."

"Certainly, Emperor-sama," I replied. That made sense, they needed to set up logistics for the war. "Where would you like me to arrive?"

"If you can control that, right outside the Ice-palace would be for the best," The Emperor said. "I will see you tomorrow. Yujiro, if you'd provide escort?"

"Of course, my lord Emperor," Yujiro bowed and the Emperor disappeared beneath the sea, leaving a tidal wave in his wake. "Well, looks like you impressed the Emperor! That makes me impressed, and a little upset!"

Quest Updated: A Stranger in a Strange Land

Completed: Speak with the Emperor Penguin.

Continue Assisting the Penguins.

"Why?" I rose my eyebrow.

"Because now I owe one of my friends a few krill-snacks!" Yujiro said. "Do you know how hard those are to come by anymore? They've gotten way too good at hiding!"

I started laughing. Because honestly, this guy was annoying and the fact that I annoyed him back felt like sweet revenge.

"Yeah, yeah. Yuck it up, statue-man," He frowned with half-lidded eyes.

I looked down…yeah, I lost my henge in the fight, using all my chakra like that. I rapidly put it back.

"Don't look so shocked, we all knew you were wearing one," Yujiro replied. "Might not have known what you looked like underneath it, but you were wearing one. Besides, I am glad you're alive – means we got some additional firepower on our side. Well, lightning power. That's the good stuff."

"Uh-huh," I replied, a little put off by his newly friendly demeanor. "So…shall we go?"

Quest Added: The Liberation of Blackfoot Island

Go to the Penguin Empire at 12am.

"So, Daisuke," Hisako came up to me after we finished the training exercise for the day. Her hands were clasped behind her back and she tilted her head slightly. "How have you been?"

"I've been okay," I replied. I was leaning against the trunk of a tree, looking through the book to find some additional perks to possibly replace Ninja and Paralyzing Palm, since they were rapidly becoming obsolete. "Wh…how about you?"

"I've been good!" She chirped, smiling wide. "Helping those three is actually pretty fun. Naruto seems to be doing better, I've noticed."

"His stance has certainly improved, I replied shrugged. "All that nagging I did about it must've paid off."

"It must've," She nodded. "So, I was wondering…it's been a while since we've really gone at it. In a spar. And I was wondering…if you…you know, wanted to spar?"

"Sure," I blinked. Surfing for perk choices can wait, I guess. I stood up. "So, weapons allowed or Taijutsu only?"

"Taijutsu only," Hisako replied, still smiling. "You know – I want to see how I've gotten better."

Okay. That was a little odd. Normally, she at least used her twin kunai. Bare-handed was too frustrating for her since she didn't train it much. I guess she's stepped it up while I wasn't looking.

We walked out into the grass clearing and took opposing sides five feet away from each other. I took a stance and so did she – a strong style stance. Her training with Lee's stuck with her, and she looked comfortable in it.

Predictably, I made the first move, aiming a punch for her face, which she ducked under, aiming a kick for my stomach which I side-stepped. Then she followed up with two punches aimed toward my face, both of which I parried. I aimed a knee to her stomach, but she hopped away.

Alright, I was impressed. Did she…yeah, she had training weights on. I didn't see them immediately since she had her red jacket on, but they were on her wrists and judging from the slight bulge in her pantlegs, her ankles as well.

She hopped forward again, aiming a fist at my head but also a kick to my shin. I leaned to the right to dodged the punch to my head but…the kick to my shin hit?

-3 hp.

Huh. She has gotten better, especially evident when she followed up by landing a kick straight to my stomach and sent me to the ground.

-6 hp.

"Oof," I slowly stood up. "Alright, that was pretty good."

Hisako simply gave a feral grin and beckoned me forward. I rose an eyebrow and dashed forward, aiming a fist for her face and impacting, but she grappled my arm and leaped up to kick me in the face with both feet. I brought up my other arm and blocked both of them, and she spring boarded off of the arm, bouncing off one hand to land back on the ground. I rushed forward with another punch, hitting her in the shoulder and she retaliated with an elbow from the other arm to my gut.

-5 hp.

She's holding back, like I am. This is training and we're not trying to kill each other. But I still retaliated with a knee that she blocked, but that left her head vulnerable and I brought both hands down in a combined fist to knock her down.

"Ow," She said, slowly getting to her feet. "You still hit like an ox, you know that?"

"Sorry," I replied. "I'm not actually trying to hurt you."

"But that's what makes sparring with you fun," She said, getting up with a smirk and assuming another stance. "I like the element of danger."

Why do I suddenly feel a little bit warmer…no. Oh no.

"R-right," I replied, taking another stance. "Keep going?"

"Of course," She got into another stance, flicking her hair out of her eyes with a turn of her head.

Puberty is here. Kill a shark and call it breakfast, puberty is here. Goodbye any semblance of rational judgement for the next six to eight years and maybe beyond. I'm screwed. Completely and utterly screwed.

…I also think it's amusing and slightly terrifying that Hisako's flirting with me because she doesn't think I'll understand what she's doing...or maybe she does think I understand and is probably a-okay with that. I mean, I knew she didn't give up on that crush, but she's…being pretty blatant about her interest here. Or maybe that's just my retarded brain finally catching up after seventeen levels of crap.

She charged forward. I blocked the punch to my chest and retaliated with a punch that was similarly blocked before I moved my foot around and shoved her down. She grabbed my arms and I ended up going down with her, landing on top of her.

Hisako was panting heavily. She laughed, and I quickly got up, my face burning. Then I offered her a hand up that she took. "Thanks. That was fun."

"You're welcome," I replied. "It was fun."

"Soooo…" Hisako started. "…are you okay? I…heard about the mission ban."

"I…I'm doing alright," I gained a level and joined a war. I'm actually more than okay. I'm great. But… "Hisako, be honest with me."

She hummed and raised an eyebrow.

"Do…you think I'm self-destructive?" I asked with a frown.

She waited for a minute, her lips becoming a flat line. "To a point, yes."

I sighed. "Okay. Why?"

"Well, you did rush into hostile territory without leaving marks for us to follow and then rushed into a fight with a giant fish-man by yourself," Hisako answered with a shrug. "…why did you do that, anyway?"

"I…don't suppose 'keeping you away from the danger' is going to fly this time, is it?" I asked with a sigh, sitting down.

"No," Hisako replied with an annoyed look. "No, it is not."

I groaned. "I don't know. There's a lot of reasons, I guess. I wanted first crack at him, killing him would've given me a lot of EXP…"

Hisako blinked and tilted her head. "What's EXP?"

"It's the standard of measurement for how close or far I am to a level-up," I replied, annoyed that I had let that slip-on accident. "Bloodline, you know?"

"Level-up is a power spike?" Hisako rose an eyebrow.

"…yes," Wow, I'm such an idiot.

"Don't look so down," Hisako said, sitting down beside me. "Knowing the details of your bloodline's not going to chase me off…I'm still your friend. You know that, right?"

"Thanks, Hisako," I said with a small smile. "I mean that…really."

"So…you charged into an impossible fight because it would give you lots of EXP?" Hisako asked with a frown. I nodded and she looked up, thinking. "And…there's a power-spike in the future that'll fix your social skills?"

"Along with a lot of other things," I answered with a frown. "The mission ban's…irritating because of it."

"Daisuke-kun…don't take this the wrong way," Hisako started with a frown. "But I'm starting to think you go off on your own less to keep us out of harm's way and more to make sure none of us take your kills."

"I…you know what, probably," I replied, shrugging. "I don't even understand myself some days."

She actually laughed. "No wonder you got annoyed when I killed that bandit way back when."

"The fat guy on the way to Takayama?" I asked. "I…guess. But I wasn't kidding about asking how a blind guy could help us find Arai."

"Arai? Oh, right…the driver," Hisako nodded to herself. "I guess, but it fits, huh?"

"I…yes, actually," I replied. "Killstealing annoys me."

"You even have a name for it," Hisako shook her head. "Wow, okay. That means you like it when you're away from Sensei during a mission, huh?"

"I won't lie," I said slowly, resting my head in my hand. "I do like doing as much as I can myself."

"Well, I can understand that," Hisako shrugged, leaning back on both her hands. "But…see, the thing is, it still looks suicidal, especially when you just charge in and come back looking like you're dead."

"I like to get things done quickly," I said, looking at her. "Less chance for interference that way."

"But more injuries for you," Hisako frowned, sitting up straight. "That's kind of what I'm talking about. It looks like your disregarding your personal safety to blindly charge into danger…that's really concerning for those of us that, you know, care about you."

"I…yeah, I guess that makes sense," I sighed. "I just…I want my social problems over. Before the fish-man incident, I was perfectly okay with waiting until the level up to fix my social problems. Afterwards, I thought about…well…you know the Super Henge?"

"You haven't been using it, right?" Hisako asked, brow furrowed.

"The Super Henge was a lie from the get-go," I confessed.

"It…was?" Hisako blinked in confusion. "Then how did you do that?"

"I…have a wonky relationship with reality," I said. "So, when I wear certain clothes, I get a bonus to one of my stats. The clothes I was wearing increased my Charisma. My ability to interact with people."

"So…you were being serious about it just being the outfit," She deadpanned, looking across the clearing. "Huh. That…is bizarre."

"That's why I said it was the Super-henge," I nodded. "I wasn't sure how you'd react to it actually being my clothes."

Hisako's shoulders slumped and she spoke quietly. "I wish you trusted us more."

"I'm sorry," I sighed. "I…have a lot of trouble trusting people. Even my friends, apparently. It doesn't matter, though."

"I think it matters," Hisako frowned. "We're your friends, we care about you."

"No, I mean about the Charisma-boost," I shook my head. "I was banned from using anything that does it to begin with…the price I pay for being dishonest, I guess."

"Well, personally," Hisako gave me a reassuring smile. "I like you the way you are."

"You weren't complaining when I was wearing the suit," I replied wryly.

She sighed and smiled. She got the joke err…humor! "I mean, I don't mind if you don't get a boost. You're my crazy, hard-working, overpowered teammate. I like you like that. In fact, I hope you stay crazy, hard-working and overpowered when you get that level up. Nichiren doesn't care if you don't get a boost either. Naruto certainly doesn't care. Sakura and Sasuke don't care either…some of the clan heirs might care, but they'll learn."

"Sensei doesn't care either," Hisako finished.

"Yes, he does," I replied with a frown. "He helped put the ban on Charisma-boosters in the first place."

"He thinks you were brain-washing yourself to be socially acceptable," Hisako argued, completely deadpan. "That reminds me."

She hit me on the arm. Hard.

-4 HP.

"Ow."

"That's for making me feel guilty about liking you while you were supposedly brainwashed," Hisako folded her arms across her chest.

"Sorry," I shrugged. "I didn't mean for it to spiral out of control like that. I…just wanted to make a good first impression for the first time in my life."

"I know," Hisako sighed, looking across the clearing again. "It's okay."

We sat in silence. I laid back on the ground, watching the clouds go by. She laid back too.

"So…what's it like?" Hisako asked with a frown. "Not needing to sleep?"

"A lot of boring nights," I answered, watching a dragon-cloud eat the sun. "I usually go for a run around the village before I end up sleeping anyway just so there's stuff to do."

"It'll probably get better once we get promoted to Chunin," Hisako said, having joined me on the grass. "That way you can do all the missions you want during the night since you won't need to wait for any of us."

"…I guess," I watched an amorphous blob drift across the sky. "That's assuming I don't get assigned to Cryptography or R&D and stop being allowed to leave Konoha because my work's too valuable to waste."

"I don't think they'd do that," Hisako replied. "There's lots of ninja who pull double duty, taking missions and doing R&D when they're in the village…keep a consistent income going, you know."

"So…both your parents are Shinobi?" I asked her.

"Yeah," Hisako nodded. "It gets kind of lonely at home, with how often they're gone."

"So, are they primarily border guards or couriers or something?" I asked with a frown.

Hisako sighed. "I…can't really talk about it. I don't actually know what they do most of the time. I can guess, but…I don't know."

"I see," I replied. I…could be wrong, but I think I got what she meant. She's always wanted to join ANBU Black-ops…I think both of her parents are in ANBU. It would explain why they're so busy all the time. "Forget I asked, then."

"It's okay to ask," Hisako turned to look at me. "I just can't answer, you know?"

Right. Definitely ANBU. I will forever be grateful that, at the very least, my Charisma scales with level.