William_Wilson_6078

don't thank me. I'm just a mouthy asshole

I read the original getting a tech system and I've read this authours first try at remaking the story getting a tech system in the modern day. They are both enjoyable reads, but this try has so far been a 3rd rate attempt at best. the fixes mentioned have sofsr proven to be making the mc into a whiney fool and the system into an almost useless money dump.

PLEASE move the story along. these chapter long descriptive monologs are a waste and the repetitions of useless info is just turning this story into a fucking slog.

worse start that the 1st attempt

use the momentum you got and start pumping up parkers' stats and abilities. hes still pishing rookoe numbers almost 200 chapters in. 🤣

do you have this on a patreon?

so far i have mostly enjoyed this story but you do have a few things that could use some work. your pacing is a bit jumpy. the mc isnt being utilized according his stated personality and abilities and drive. he wants power to not be a stepping stone but fails to use what he has at had to grab that power. also if he has gone up 2 power levels why isnt that reflected better in his stats. he's had like 4 different positive body alterations and hes still barley 20 points in each gotta up them numbers or the rest of the system stuff is made fairly pointless. and your chapters are kinda short. You have a good plot and characters. i look foward to how the story goes

you have an interesting story but you seem to be jumping around alot

perfect template to have him massacre hydra with and wrap up their involvement

your MC is not sociopath he is a narcissist teenager despite being an old soul, which is just poor writing. shit he barely touches the psychopath spectrum. Nyx is a psychopath for sure, but marcus is just a hyper intelligent narcissist with ADD