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thanks for the honest feedback I'm trying my best to improve. From now I on I'll be using first and send pov
Good description and decent world building also i recommend on writing your character more detailed so that it could be a part of the story and also the world building keep it paced and understandable
The novel is pretty good, you should double check the grammar per chapter and polish it but as long as it's readable I'm okay with it. Good world background and keep making it interesting and mysterious
The story has potential when it comes to system, so as the world background it goes well with the system and lore of this novel. Seems interesting would read more about it
first chapter is quite good i like the world building and how the story sets. I'd recommend continue on working on your world build so as your characters as well, wording is well detailed.
Keep up the work like the setting of this story i read a lot of romance novel and manga but this seems good. Don't stop writing and also try publishing weekly if you can it would help your readers keeping the pace of your story [img=recommend]
Love the story the monologues and dialogues aren't confusing it makes every chapter connected and also the interesting characters from the novel are also likeable in every aspects
I like the story and i also love the world building of this novel
Hello, I am the author of this book please considering to support this project. I got lots of plans for this novel. I don't upload chapters everyday because I am too busy on other businesses but i am mostly active all the time.