Blyinx

LOTM mentioned

Yeah, thanks for reading! I realised I only had one chapter stick piled and writing a chapter per day was too much for me with my usual schedule. I’v taken it down and will be releasing it again when I have more chapters!

Great start author! I like the vibe of this world, and the church being suspicious while they search for these children sparks my curiosity. Writing style is mature and definitely leaves you wanting to read more

You mean Demergat? Or clean slate? Demergat I dropped because I started it with no planning and wrote myself into a corner that I didn’t like

Amazing start to the novel. Author has a mature writing style that reads very easily with no grammatical mistakes. The language is very evocative too, each paragraph paints strong imagery in your kind, good job!

Interestin start for a gate novel. Mc has a backround that’ to be explained and keeps you curious, and the dialogue is quite funny. Good grammar too, definitely potential here, I can see it as a manhua

Nice start. It gives me player one vibes, and the general atmosphere of your writing is pretty upbeat and bright, it’s good vibes. First person is pretty difficult to pull of but your doing a good job so far

Great start. Dialogue flows more naturally than most novels I’ve read on here. First chapter is captivating too, good job

Solid first chapter. Gives me sword art online vibes, and the mystery around their father and purple eyes is definitely strong enough that I‘d want to continue reading

The strong point of this novel so far is the constant descriptive language, very easy to picture what the author is trying to depict. However, the constant switching of tenses throws the reading experience of a little bit. If that’s fixed, there’s pontential here