Yesnth

I mean, what would even be the premise of a dragon ball fanfic? I honestly can't tell.

Things are getting somewhat hectic now. But it all ought to turn out well in the end. A happy ending is how fairy tales usually end, right?

See, parts like these are what makes the fight feel bland. It feels somewhat like exposition. Everything is plainly laid out without any flavour. It would have been better if this guy's reaction was also written out. Like, "Venin attempted a retreat, but as he attempted to move, shock overtook him. His entire body seemed filled with lead – his muscles were unwilling to listen, frozen into place as if he were a stone statue." There needs to be a healthy blend of reaction and real time information relay. Readers aren't satisfied with pure action anymore. There's a certain rhythm in which the action needs to be told.

Get well soon author! Thanks for the chapter!

I love how absolutely smug Rhine is XD

I feel like there's a bit too much repition in movement. At least in how the movement's being described. Things like 'no hesitation' and the like. I don't have too much of a problem with the descriptive aspect of it, but it would be nice if it had a bit more flow to it. something like getting into other aspects, besides just the movement and the move set of the two individuals – like the sounds that ring in the air, the destruction they leave behind them getting relayed at a large scale, the damage they are causing to the surroundings, etc. There's a lot you can do to make a fight scene interesting – one of which is play on the mc's quirks or his unique abilities to gain an exaggerated reaction by the assailant. stuff like that is always fun to read.

"Do not look directly at God."

I CALLED IT!!