mattzem

It doesn't get better, that's for sure. I'm on chapter 58 and I'm really struggling to give a shit as to what happens to him at this point. I mean you can only have your MC make so many poor choices before the audiences just gives up caring. The rest of the characters of the story have thread bare motivations and come off as 2d caricatures of competent people, as well as the politics of the galaxy so far is about as shallow and complicated as a school yard rivalry, To go from tyranny of steel to this disaster is mind boggling.

My ability to suspend disbelief is getting a serious workout here, The fact that he did almost nothing to hide his relationship after what already happened to him seems farfetched also this isn't how you treat people you are interested in for a long term contract or service. This is how you treat disposable pawns who even if they flip can do you no damage.

I don't know how they have gotten to their level with so little critical thinking skills.

This makes no sense? Why burn out your pilots for no reason?

This sounds more like a video game side quest then actual criminal behavior.

This is a god awful amount of time and effort to spend just to score some booze and smokes.

It's statements like this that have me doubting you did any research into an actual war in preparations for writing this war story. I can't understand how any modern navy would make such a foolish decision? If your increasing your navy by 50% in such a short time then you would never throw away veteran troops like this, you would instead rotate your fleets on the front line and to move your veteran's around to stiffen up the newer fleets while giving every fleet a chance to bleed there new recruits. This throwing away of your best for no reason is just stupid.

huh? The number one reason authors give for quitting an ongoing novel is the hateful comments they get online that kill any enjoyment they get out of writing a story. Considering you already finished your last novel which I loved, and is the only reason I am here, good on you!

is this the knock off kobayashi maru?

man every time I see a famous or well known movie/book quote being used inside a different amateur novel, it always makes me cringe a bit and really brings me out of the story. If your not familiar with it, the above is similar to a lord of the rings quote from King Théoden as he asks, "What can man do against such reckless hate?" in The Two Towers movie. Not sure if it's in the books but it was close enough for me to think of it when reading it.