BowmanW
I have read thousands of chapters of various novels from Japanese to Chinese to Korean.
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BowmanW11mthComentado porMentally a man, but physically? Physically Rimuru can be anything your heart desires. ;)
"Hm?" Rimuru tilted his head cutely. Nahida's heart nearly leaped out of his chest. But he rejected those feelings. Rimuru was a man. Don't think of strange things.- BowmanW11mthComentado por
"This one would have a happy ending... eventually..." I wish more stories did this. Sure, it's a spoiler and slightly dampens the surprises and drama because you know at the end everything will be fine, but its also nice just to enjoy a hardcore, depressing and grim story knowing that everything will be resolved at the end with a happy ending.
Legends would be made that day. Legends of a love-struck Sister descending into a berserker rage in search of the one she loved and obsessed over. As Sabine rampaged through the battlefield, traitors and loyalists alike stopped to watch her bloody and desperate tear. Enough people had seen the way Sabine treated Octus before the ambush. Their tales would add to the legends. The report of a respected Commissar would help spread the legends as well. Completely unintentionally, Sabine would go on to inspire generations of romantic Sisters as they told her story in their Schola bunks. And like all the best stories, this one would have a happy ending… eventually… - BowmanW11mthrespondió a overloaded_maxima(Pic here<<<)
- BowmanW11mthComentado por
L rekt
Este párrafo ha sido eliminado. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
Could have probably done without the 'to call a certain person'. It's implied he'll call someone when he takes out his phone. It's just useless words.
'It seems that I have to take care of another chore once again.' He took out a mobile phone as he searched for a specific name to call a certain person. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
Barely makes sense. How would she have a photo of him? Why would she not know if she does? Was she randomly taking photos before approaching him? Feels forced. Jarring.
She took out her phone from her pocket, hoping to have taken a photo of him when he wasn't looking. She decided that she would use her contacts and resources to find him. She decided that she would surprise him. - BowmanW11mthrespondió a BowmanW
Overall, pretty alright so far. Writing quality is brilliant, great grammar and vocabulary. However, the story is already seeming to be fairly repetitive. First chapter was especially bad, every other paragraph felt like the same thing just phrased differently.
Este párrafo ha sido eliminado. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
I'd avoid repeating stuff at the start of chapters, because while its somewhat good for returning readers its just jarring for people reading all in one sitting. If you want or need to do something like this, then write the paragraph differently, don't just copy and paste.
Este párrafo ha sido eliminado. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
Just want to flex my meagre knowledge for a sec: Generally, if someone is knocked unconscious, especially through a physical impact, then that means something has gone very, very wrong. There is a good chance they will die if they don't receive medical treatment very soon as serious internal bleeding is likely. Just wanted to point that out as anime, games and basically all media show being knocked out as being fairly safe for the victim and just a temporary loss of consciousness. These criminals aren't exactly underserving of such a fate.
I walked over to the guy with the bleeding fingers and gave him a quick chop to the back of the neck, immediately sending him to La La Land. The final remaining thug's eyes widened at my action. I approached him and said, "I'm Supergirl," as I slammed my fist right into his gut and knocked him out too! - BowmanW11mthComentado por
average webnovel reader: i have crung and you must know
Once again, the crowd of spectators went completely silent, some people's mouths gaping open as they all seemed to be taking in every word I was saying. I continued, "I would just like to say, it's nice to meet all of you for the very first time. You all can call me Supergirl, and I am... A SUPERHERO!" With that, I struck a quick pose for everyone filming me, and then I shot off into the sky like a bullet to eat my hotdog. In the background all I could hear were the deafening cheers I was receiving. And, to be honest, why wouldn't they be cheering? They just saw a super gorgeous girl like myself literally flying in the sky, wearing a superhero costume. Of course, they'd lose their collective minds! All those people's entire worlds had just been flipped on their axis, after all! When they all calm down and start to think rationally again then I'll see what the public's true thoughts on me are. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
rolled a 1 on a speech check
"I don't see any wires. That must be some really good CGI holding her up in the air." - BowmanW11mthComentado por
nani?
"Who?" Sam asked. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
A skirt wouldn't actually be that bad if you had shorts. A skirt over a full bodysuit would be pretty good as well. Just a bodysuit is pretty questionable.
I gasped at what was inside. In the box was not one, not two, but three brand new superhero outfits! What's more, they actually looked functional and not like the slutty skirt/half shirt comic book Supergirl costume! These outfits were full black skin-tight bodysuits with a bright red "S" stamped right over the chest area. There were also matching pairs of red gloves and red boots. And finally, there were three bright red, absolutely amazing capes! To test the costume's durability, I pulled on one of the outfits a bit with both hands, and to my relief and surprise, the outfit stretched and proved it could actually handle my strength without getting damaged! Whatever crazy Kryptonian science made these outfits, they made them borderline indestructible! - BowmanW11mthComentado por
woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. oo
If anyone ever asks, I didn't spend the last 20 minutes dancing around in joy at my apparent Isekai /Reincarnation. No, I did not... Okay, I did, but who wouldn't!? - BowmanW11mthComentado por
Shame. Was hoping he would stay as an old guy. It was what made me interested in the novel in the first place, now it just feels like any old multiverse travelling novel but with a 'wiser' main character.
Este libro ha sido eliminado. - BowmanW11mthrespondió a cereal_fisher_1194
Timeskip. Left the restaurant and then came back later when he heard the news.
Suddenly Veldora came rushing into the Restaurant. - BowmanW11mthComentado por
That moment when some of your best guys get blitzed like cannon fodder
The very next moment, all eight heads were chopped into tiny pieces. - BowmanW11mthrespondió a MikeTEM
Amagi Brilliant Park
"Oh by the way, didn't your friend want to see Fallen Angels? What do you say, want to go to an Oppai Club?" He asked the boy who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. - BowmanW2yrComentado por
o n e m i l l i o n ...?
She could not compare to those major streamers with over one million viewers, but at this rate, it was only a matter of time. All she needed to do was occasionally hug Qiuqiu to increase her popularity. - BowmanW2yrComentado por
w h a t
Now that she was in the same frame as Su Mo's panda baby, her viewership exploded, and there were currently more than 100,000 people watching.