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And? I gave an example and compared it to the attitude of these "people" who degrade themselves for "historical reparations". I didn't mention race, you could be black or a Black Hawk helicopter, I don't care about that.
Can you share the raw link?
No offense intended. But you give me the vibe of those people (white liberals) who kissed the boots of a group of black people for "historical reparations".
Dude, is this a translation?
I think the only purpose of a character in a story is to enhance the work and "lift up the ball for other characters". So, what’s the reason for the Acrobatic Silky being there? Why not let the Acrobatic Silky soul move on and reunite with her daughter, as the manga seems to suggest? That would be more beautiful and meaningful than just keeping her with Aira to teach things about XXX. If you want to keep Acrobatic Silky with Aira, you could create a mini-arc for Aira, similar to Yuta’s in Jujutsu Kaisen 0, where Aira bids farewell to her 'mother,' and the Acrobatic Silky leaves a copy of herself to stay with Aira as a Shikigami. Give Aira some sort of power, like the ability to absorb spiritual energy and channel it into her new Shikigami. And please, stop having Mahito interfere in everything. Let other characters shine. If he’s going to handle everything, why does he even bother training anyone? If Momo and Okarun can solve the problems, why does Mahito show up? Just to show off? It feels like a kid watching others play and wanting to join, but since they’re never invited, they try to butt in. Of course, this is just constructive advice, you can do whatever you want with your fic. And sorry for my bad English.
Why not also include the powers of the Fullbringer from Bleach. Of course, if, like in the Bleach universe, in Dandadan the objects also have souls. Or even try to put several souls and combine them inside an object, and thus try to create a Zanpakutō.
All the critiques and advice I had were noted on my phone, and my phone’s screen went black. Well, I’ll try to keep the original idea of the critiques. The main piece of advice I would give to any author, especially in romance — since most of them fail at this point — is regarding the female protagonist. The female protagonist doesn’t need to be the most beautiful woman in the world for readers to like her; she needs to be as charismatic as possible. In real life, older and more experienced men tend to look for women with a good personality rather than just good looks. A relationship isn’t only about what happens in bed. She has to be a partner, a friend, someone you can talk to and have fun with. In most of the stories I’ve read, the female protagonist is just a pretty 'inflatable doll'; they hardly have any personality of their own. Another point: your story is mostly about social interactions, right? Your characters are very '2D', you know? Like, they’re really bland, they hardly have any personalities, traits, or defining characteristics. The best characters in a story are the ones with strong personalities, so don’t be afraid to take risks with them. I’ll give you an example: Daemon Targaryen, up until he went to Harrenhal, was the most beloved character in House of the Dragon. Daemon has a strong personality, and he’s not exactly a nice guy — he’s actually quite a jerk. Now, a nice guy with a strong personality would be Satoru Gojo. He’s a goofball, but he’s still the most loved character in Jujutsu Kaisen. One great thing about having characters with strong personalities is when they interact. Look at Daemon and Viserys, or Billy Butcher and Homelander. Who doesn’t want to see Butcher versus Homelander? All of this is because of the interactions created throughout the series, and their personalities really add to it. And one last thing: never try to create a perfect character. Don’t try to explain in detail why a character has this or that type of personality either. Let the readers understand and see the characters' personalities through social interactions, such as dialogue and conversations.
I don't mind if you give me some spoilers if you want. Sorry man, but it really turned me off. I literally read until chapter 26 by forcing myself. I feel like the story doesn't get anywhere, and that the whole world and its characters are very D2. This story really isn't my cup of tea, good luck and much success to you author-san.
I don't even know what to think about this...
She should have arrived only after the guy had finished "playing" with the MC. That way he would stop being a brainless animal. A beta Japanese protagonist is one of the worst things there is. And don't come defending this shit, the guys were armed, so this counts as self-defense at the very least.