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Your piece shows great potential and honestly with the story line I feel like I am watching a drama play out before me. It needs a bit of polishing in some areas but I would love to read more. Keep up the good work!
A wonderfully charming piece, a few spelling/grammatical errors, but, not enough to take away from the story. Very intriguing and full of potential, there were a few spots in the first chapter that made me curious. Overall a wonderful read.
I'm yearning to read more it's absolutely brilliant! Character design and development flow so smoothly as you continue to read and the story development is spot on going from Naomi as a teenager to her as an adult. Her back story is brief yet full of necessary information that the reader needs to grasp an understanding of what she has been through and relating to Naomi I love. Please tell me once this is fully written you're sending this to a publisher.
Thank you! [img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
Your story-line has a really great concept and the dialog between your characters plays a very intriguing yet mysterious scenario. Definitely would recommend and can't wait to see your future works.
Absolutely love the story but i was in the midst of reading and went to go read the next chapter after firefruit but now the new chapters no longer exist? Ah I really want to read the next chapters.
Oh its turning out perfectly!!!
I absolutely love the story line and the art work! I cant wait to read more chapters once they are released this is turning out to be really exciting!