rukuto

Making a patreon exclusive fan-fic basically means he is pirating, plagiarizing and stealing... fanfics are supposed to be free. Shame on you.

https://www.256wx.net/read/61893/13.html read the raws. The translation here might not even be half of the full story, it is all smut after all.

Kudos to trying something new and the writing quality is fine with few mistakes. However: Using Indian characters had so much potential but this was so bad, I could not read more than 10 chapters. You could have cultural shocks, new outlooks to same techniques, missing family (especially when the concept of family in india is different from that of a clan in japan and china here). You could have even gone the route of stereotypes of indians and made them good at maths and studies, or taken on different kinds of food. So much potential. Then there is the idiotic stuff like them training together at night and talking out loud. Not even talking about trusting shikamaru without any build up. Then there is the whole missed important stuff that is more enjoyable to read (i.e. conversations/thought processes, explanations, etc.) over what is more enjoyable to see (i.e. the fights). Of course, skipping the whole bunches of chapters from going to school to directly the chunin exams makes one wonder.

Umm Sasuke?

Is it always going to be Indian names because it will create a huge disconnect with the story. Also, will there be hindu cultural clashes or will they be able to speak like ninja from the get go? Interested to read indian characters in a fanfic... I will probably read a few chapters but this first chapter is not really convincing. Too fast paced and hopefully we can see the repercussions of their out loud discussions that can easily be overhead by the ANBU that would one hundred percent be following them.

as far as I remember, knowledge and techniques and recipes were stored in parchments but you needed to use soul/mental power to read it. There was so much information in each of them that if they were to write normally, it would be impossible to read and understand and memorize. So, high level knowledge was directly transferred to the brain. That's why it was difficult to make copies.

Bruh...

I will also review in ff but I just want this story to spread more... it was so funny.... I laughed out loud so many times instead of the smile and a heavy breath...

Glaringly obvious that it was written by an AI. Read as a fast food story and nothing more. There is nothing new, nothing different from many other HP Fanfics. Many holes in the plot. Many skipped details. Fast paced at times and slow paced at times. The story from before and after 7th year is like a different story altogether. Would have in fact enjoyed the second part as an original over this (but the brain power required to navigate and then to put it in words (to make a great story) is not common).

Thanks for the chapter ChatGPT... It reads so much like a report.