Within These Walls

I’ve been here before, I lost count after my sixth time here. After that sixth time there was countless more times I was here but it’s always the same, either attempted suicide or an eating disorder flare up— that’s what I’d like to call it. My attempted suicides I can always remember but my eating disorder occurrences, not so much, I tend to take those overboard which usually means that by the time I’m heading to the hospital I’m already unconscious and connected to a feeding tube— so that’s my truth. This time I don’t know why I am here, I just booked myself in because I just needed to be more creative with controlling the chemical imbalances in my brain.