The Fool

I must have looked pale as a ghost. I was looking at all men at the table, completely shocked. I felt a warm hand on my shoulder. Baldwin gestured towards my cup. Not understanding his gesture, he sighed, only to fill my cup with wine to the brim.

"There’s a reason he drinks it all the time," he said, gesturing towards Melchior.

A scoff came from my left. I looked up, and saw Alexander, smiling at me over his enormous cup of beer. The fireflies were reflected in his eyes, making them look like a starry sky. His hair had fallen over them again. It all made him look strange and inhuman, traits I had not noticed in him before.

"Perhaps we should discuss these matters without the lady present. I fear she might faint."

Melchior sighed in annoyance.

"Since when do you fear anything. But very well. Baldwin, you can escort her back."

Baldwin was about to rise from his seat when Alexander spoke again.

"Actually, I will go with her."

"I think she has seen quite enough of you today," Melchior said dryly.

"We both know that is impossible," responded Alexander.

I slammed my fists against the table.

"I am not fainting, and I am not going anywhere!" I shrieked.

"You want to take my father’s lands?"

When I looked into Melchior´s cold blue eyes, I realised that this had been his main objective all along. The other mountain men must have just been a way to convince the others into it.

"You never abducted me for ransom money, did you? You just want what is rightfully yours, you thief!"

Melchior regarded me slyly.

"That is the main objective. However, ransom money also won't hurt. So rest assured, your hard work wasn't for nothing."

The mountain folk around us snickered.

However, Alexander got up from his seat. His usual annoyingly cheerful expression was replaced by a furious one.

One that made me angrier than I had ever been in my life, because it was entirely unjust.

"I would take another moment to consider who exactly is the thief, Lady Collios."

I shoved my seat away to get up, but felt the iron grip of Baldwin´s hand around my wrist. I looked at him furiously, but his worried expression brought me back to reality. I looked around, to see many angry, some seriously worrying, faces looking at me. Faces of men who had done things, experienced things, that I couldn´t imagine.

I therefore didn´t look up during the rest of the evening. Not even when Melchior patronizingly asked me whether I was still capable of dining with them. Not even when all the other mountain men laughed. Even Baldwin.

The men grew louder and louder by the minute. Some of them were mocking my voice in a high pitch, repeating what I had just declared in front of the entire entourage of bandits.

When I had managed to eat the meat, I noticed Alexander was standing right next to me. He didn´t say a word. He only looked at me, silent and disappointed. I hadn´t had many expectations of him to begin with. However, justifying my abduction in front of me wasn´t something I would have thought him capable of.

“You should get out of here,’’ he said, making a gesture with his head towards some men on the other table who were eyeing me. My hands started to tremble at the pure hatred in their eyes. No one had ever looked at me that way before.

I took one last look back at Melchior, but he was staring at his cup, seemingly deep in thought.

I silently followed Alexander towards my tent. When standing in front of it, with torches a few metres away, I realized how dark it was outside. And how alone I was. If those men were planning to harm me in any way, they would be able to do so unscathed. With my heart racing, I turned back, hoping Alexander hadn´t left yet.

He hadn´t moved and was still standing behind me.

"You´re not returning?’" I asked warily.

He raised his dark eyebrows.

"Would you prefer me to?"

I shook my head, then opened the tent door, expecting him to remain outside. I shrieked when he followed me in the tent, where a lantern was already lit.

"If I´m going to keep watch, at least let me do it inside,’’ he said grumpily, before taking the pillow I had thrown at his face and sitting on it.

I blushed at my own stupidity, but ignored him and walked straight to the bed. I sat down on it, and untied my white boots, which had become very dirty. After placing them neatly next to the bed, I lifted the simple, rough fabric of the covers, and let them envelop myself completely. In my mind´s eye, I saw the bloodied bodies of the servants that had travelled with me. I heard their screams. I saw the road I had travelled with the bandits, Alexander´s laugh, and Melchior´s taxing eyes. Tears silently filled my eyes.

A few minutes of silence passed, before I heard a deep sigh coming from the corner of the tent.

"I know this must have been terrifying for you."

"I feel like I have been stolen," I sobbed.

A few moments of silence passed again.

"Well, you´re not wrong," said Alexander awkwardly.

I quickly lifted the covers so he could see my face, momentarily forgetting that it was red from crying.

"Then how dare you say that I should consider who the thief is! I was robbed of my life."

At least, the life that I could have lived.

Alexander looked at my face in bewilderment. In fact, he turned a bit red.

"I didn´t know you were going to cry," he mumbled.

I quickly hid under the covers, but even from under them, I could hear his heavy footsteps slowly, reluctantly, walk towards my bed.

"I… apologise for saying that," he said softly, as if he was saying something extremely unpleasant.

"But," he added quickly, "I still think that you should consider who is the thief in this situation."

I was making haste to grab the pillow under my head, when he said something else.

"I'm afraid you don´t know your father very well, Ignis."

Ignis.

Apparently, Alexander was one of those "buffoons that liked familiarity".

However, why was I thinking about this after he had questioned my bond with my own father?

"I have known my father longer than you have, thank you," I said snarkily.

I could hear his soft chuckle. It was starting to become familiar to me.

"I found out that the people close to us are oftentimes the ones we know the least about."

I thought about this for a moment.

"I think that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard."

He was laughing again. A careless laugh, that reminded me of our little race on horseback, for some strange reason.

"Perhaps it´s a bit stupid. But, in all these years, have you ever wondered what your father´s power means for the rest of us? For the men, women and children living in the mountains?"

In all these years, I had been more occupied with embroidering, dinner parties and other things that young Ladies usually occupied themselves with. At least, that is what I presumed they occupied themselves with. In all these years, isolated in my father´s mansion, I had only met a few other Ladies. Let alone men, women and children from the villages.

My silence was enough of an answer for Alexander.

"I grew up in these villages, Ignis. And look where that has lead me to."

It had lead him towards the life of a bandit. It had lead him to rob people of their belongings, to killing servants, and even towards abducting a rich Lady.

I slowly lifted the covers to look at him. He was standing inches away from my bed, with a soft smile on his face.

"It is no excuse for what you did, you killed the servants," I said warily.

Alexander nodded.

"Yes, we did. And we did more shameful things that you cannot imagine."

I slowly sat up.

"Why?’" I asked him softly.

"Because the alternative, living under your father´s rule, because that is what he is doing Ignis, make no mistake about it, is so much worse."

As a child, I had looked over the mountains, from the windows of my room. High in the tower of the mansion, I had only seen the mountaintops, doused in sunlight. I had imagined that only happy families lived there, eating simple, large meals after their daily work.

Now, I realized that I had been a fool.

I laid my head down on the pillow, surprised to feel a large, warm hand on my hair. It moved up and down slowly, as if petting a dog.

"Get some rest, Ignis."

I still remember feeling safer, instantly, as if the mere touch of his hand could make all things better again.