chapter [23]

It was the evening before the departure to London and I found myself staring at the wall after not having left the apartment the whole day with the excuse of needing time to mentally prepare. In reality I just didn't want to deal with Raven at the moment because I knew as soon as I saw him I'd pretend like nothing happened and I was totally fine even though I didn't mean to.

He hadn't even apologized to me or anything like that... it wasn't like I was angry at him for that but it still hurt a little.

We were still cool though. At least I hoped we were because personally I didn't plan on holding any grudges or judge what he said to me yesterday much. I tried to.

At some point I realized that thinking about this too much wouldn't use me anything and I stood up from the chair I had been sitting on to get ready.

Before we left for London I needed to speak to Vera or it'd be too late to tell her about what Vince explained to me. There was a chance that she'd know more after all.

However, in order to meet her secretly I had to sneak out and unfortunately the front door of the apartment was the only way. Raven had 24/7 surveillance of the hallway and I was pretty sure that a movement scanner was also put there since these people were still suspicious of me.

I took a deep breath and touched the cold door handle. I only needed to be fast enough to not be detected...

Using the maximum speed I thought I needed to afford got me out of that building in less than a second before I continued my way to the bus station breathing heavily because of all the stairs I had to run down. Luckily, I didn't encounter any people inside the building because it was almost midnight but as usual the streets were just as lively as in broad daylight.

Vera had promised to be at a certain bar every time around midnight the last few days before I'd go and when I entered the old fashioned jazz bar that she loved so much I could already see her sitting at some bar table with a glass of whiskey.

I had to admit that I needed a few seconds to actually realize it was her because her natural blond hair was now cherry red and cut in a short bob. The black dress she was wearing fit perfectly to it but at the same time it made me look out of place with my black joggers and dark purple hoodie.

"Vera." I called her not too loudly as she looked up to great me and make some space for me at the bar table. The music was rather silent in the background and conversations of other people were heard from all sides coming with the smell of expensive alcohol.

I pulled up the bucket hat I was wearing a little so I could clearly see my sister.

"Wow, you actually came. That's a nice change to rich youngsters thinking they can just ask me for my number." Vera laughed sarcastically and I pitied her a little although I also knew that she enjoyed the attention of other people.

"But enough of me, are you doing fine over there? Did someone follow you?" She asked and scanned the room behind us but I quickly made her calm down.

"I'm fine there, we've been preparing for the mission the last few days and they still don't know anything about you and granny. I said you are my childhood friend. I sneaked out without anyone seeing." I assured her and she nodded before pouring me a glass of coke. At least Vera accepted that I didn't drink alcohol...

"I see, that's good to hear. And how's it going with your dark haired lover boy?" She grinned and rested her chin on her hands.

At the mention of Raven I mentally sighed.

"That's not why I came here and stop calling him that." I flicked her forehead slightly and she did it back at least 10 times harder making me groan.

"I won't hehe." She chuckled evily and took another sip of her whiskey.

"Project Healer." I didn't make a big story of it because I didn't have much time but Vera reacted indifferent and raised her eyebrows.

"What?"

"I found out about the Vernez family being allies of Falcon and I was told that this weapon that everyone feared is called project healer and originally was meant for some kind of... healing? Medicine? Something like this. Did grandma ever mention it?" I moved closer and waited for a response patiently as Vera closed her eyes and thought about it more intensely.

"Project Healer... I'm actually pretty sure I've heard it some time ago but I can't remember when, by whom or in what context I'm sorry." She sighed putting her glas down.

"No worries. I already expected this." I took her response as the best I could get at the moment.

"By any chance, if you can reach granny again then please try to get something out of her. I can't call her for her own safety and last time it ended in a fight." I explained to her and she gave me an assuring nod.

"I will do as much as I can but don't forget that I am still trying to not get involved with this. I would never talk you out of what you are doing but for me I am satisfied with living like I am right now..." she explained because she knew better than me how I tended to forget about that.

"I understand." I answered a little sad that I always depended on her to help me although she had no obligation to do so.

"But still thank you. I need to go now before someone will notice." I stood up from the bar chair and wrapped my arms around her tightly. This felt like we'd not see each other in a long while again...

Gently Vera caressed the back of my head like she used to do when we were little.

"Be careful Runie. And open up to those friends of yours... I know you're dealing with everything by yourself and that you don't like telling others about your worries but that mission is also going to test your mentality." Her voice sounded worried and there was nothing more that I wanted to do than to simply stay in her arms and cry... but I let go and said a last goodbye before leaving the bar silently without anyone noticing.

Maybe Vera was right about needing to depend on others more but I wasn't able to just change my behaviors after having lived on my own most of the time. There was never a shoulder to cry on after I left my grandma and Vera and even if there had been someone, I didn't know if I'd even have considered to open up to anyone.

It was difficult for me and I had always preferred doing things on my own.

After a while I decided to get rid of these thoughts because they'd not get me anywhere so I focused on the pedestrian path and all the people walking through the streets at night.

Luckily, the bus stop was rather empty with only one person leaning against a street lantern. I couldn't see their face because of a hood but I didn't pay any attention to begin with.

Suddenly that person grabbed my arm and I almost sqieked when I flinched back to see Raven glaring down at me with furious eyes.

Shit. How did he even find me here? I was sure no one noticed me going!

"Where have you been? You know we had an agreement, Rune. What for fucks sake are you doing?!" He raised his voice in anger and disappointment making me remember how serious this agreement was to him. Of course he could still not trust me and now that I suspiciously ran away it made sense to react that way.

My first instinct was telling him to let me go and then leave but I quickly remembered that this would not make things better.

"I met with my friend. Vera." I told him the truth but left out the fact that she was my sister.

However, that seemed to make Raven even angrier. The mood was awkward enough as it was...

"Are you stupid or just suicidal? We agreed that we will report you if you leave the building without me or the others and you go out on your little date with your celebrity girlfriend? Is this a joke to you?" His grip got tighter and it started to hurt.

Keep your calm Rune... keep your calm.

I took a deep breath and tried to somehow solve this situation as best as I could but again tears formed in my eyes. Yesterday had left me on edge emotionally.

"You're hurting me." I averted my eyes to his hand still gripping mine and he immediately loosened it a little.

"And Vera is neither my girlfriend nor was this some kind of date. I just wanted to see her before we are going to London tomorrow because she is the only normal friend I have here." I glared up at Raven and thought about what to say next.

"I didn't want anyone of you to come along because I don't want to involve her in all of this."

"And how can I know that you're not lying? What if you met up with your comrades of Mellontikos to report about our mission, huh? I could kill you on the spot if it was like this." Raven not even considering believing me was something I didn't expect. How could he still mistrust me so much?

I let my lips curl into a sarcastic smile.

"After all we've been through you still think I'm some traitor that is trying to fool you? As the person in Inoue group that is supposed to know me the most, I think this is pretty disappointing... I am sorry that I left without permission and I'll face whatever consequences but hearing you say I'm teaming with Mellontikos although I'm considering you my friend even after what you said to me hurts."

There, I said it out loud and there was no going back. This was what Vera wanted, right? That I talk openly about my feelings.

Raven's eyes sparkled with an emotion that I couldn't read as he just stood there saying nothing before he slowly let go of my hand.

"I... have difficulties trusting people." Raven then sighed and avoided looking me in the eye. He wasn't angry anymore? To be honest I thought that the opposite would happen... this was untypical of him.

"I know. You've made that obvious since the very first day we met." I answered unimpressed making the older make eye contact again as if he was surprised by that.

"Right, I've treated you like shit most of the time but you always came back talking about friendship. That led me to think that you have to follow a motive because no one ever tried so hard." He explained himself and I could follow well while at the same time it gave me satisfaction that I was the first one to go that far.

"Well, every single bad thing you said hurt me, I'm not emotionless after all. Especially yesterday evening..." I paused for a second to see how he'd react and I swear I sensed him being ashamed at least a little bit.

"But... I prefer people being brutally honest over others and I know you're hiding a lot about yourself so I'm staying." I crossed my arms and raised my chin a little. What I said was only half of the truth but I could never say that I had a little crush on him. I had to keep my honor.

"I wasn't honest!" Raven spoke up sounding somehow desperate when he put both his hands on my shoulders and made me look at him. My heart skipped a beat when he pulled me closer.

In confusion I tilted my head.

"I mean all the times when I said bad things about you... it was not what I actually thought, I just came up with something to try getting on your nerve... and yesterday I... didn't mean to make you cry."

A sad expression washed over his face but I was caught in my own thoughts when I froze in place.

How did he know that I cried after our argument? There was no way he could've heard me through the walls. We weren't even on the same side of the hallway.

"You left with teary eyes and in the morning they were puffy so... it wasn't hard to tell." Raven explained starting to grin slightly when he noticed how much this upset me. How did he even dare to grin right now?

"Hm, maybe you're a little girl after all." He joked and made fun of me and before I knew it I hit him on the chest hardly because I knew he wouldn't even feel it.

"Is that everything you have to say?"

"Oh, you mean I should apologize?" Raven wondered raising his eyebrows and I nodded even though I doubted he'd do it.

"Hmmm..." he sighed extra long just to make me get impatient before he finally seemed like he made up his mind.

"I will apologize..." he started speaking and took a step closer to me while pointing at my forehead so his finger touched it. Why was he acting so weird?

"...if you give me a kiss on the cheek." He finished his sentence with a wide grin and dangerously sparkling eyes.

I inhaled sharply and closed my eyes for a second to gather my thoughts and not freak out. It was dark enough here that Raven shouldn't be able to see if the color of my face changed, right? But who the hell would ask for something like this?! He really enjoyed getting on my nerve after all.

When I opened my eyes again I didn't hesitate much because I knew the more time passed by the more awkward it would get.

So I grabbed Ravens face a little more roughly than I intended and pulled him down before pecking his cheek right where his sharp cheekbones were visible. I got it over with as quickly as possible. At the same time the bus arrived but neither of us really payed attention to it.

I pulled away and instantly let go of the olders face to cross my arms in front of my chest.

"Here you go, now apologize." I couldn't say why it felt so easy to play my nervousity of as if this was the easiest thing for me but somehow it worked. With full expectation I watched Raven touch his cheek like the most clichee thing to ever do.

"I... meant that as a joke." He explained speaking more slowly than usual and I suddenly felt ten times more uneasy than before. Of course it was a joke! What did I think?! Why would Raven even ask me to give him a kiss?!

"S- so you won't apologize?" I changed the topic as fast as I could. Raven took a deep breath and grinned at me again.

"I am sorry for having made you feel upset with what I said yesterday but now that you're standing here all cute I have the urge to tease you more." He chuckled seeming to know damn well how that affected me.

"We missed the bus." I looked away trying to ignore him but it was too late for that.

"Not even Ayaka gives me pecks but who would have thought that you are into me so much." Raven sighed and suddenly threw his arm around my shoulder while starting to walk. So we were walking all the way home now? Perfect.

"I am not into you!" I shoved his arm off me while hating the fact that what I said was most certainly a lie.

But Raven didn't even pay attention to it and started patting my head like you'd do with a little child.

"Of course, blondie. I know it's hard to admit." He played with me so easily and yet my heart skipped a beat when he did that gesture.

"I swear to god, I'll run off to get me a knife and slice your throat." I spat but didn't expect Raven to tackle me all of a sudden before throwing me over his shoulder so I was facing his back.

"No you won't." Raven happily continued his walk having no difficulty to carry me at all. This was not necessary right now. Why?!

"Let me down! I was joking!" I shrieked and hit his back a few times but of course it didn't help.

"I'm supposed to make sure you don't run off and you already slipped one time. I can't risk a second time." The older simply explained.

"You can just hold onto my arm or something! Come on!" I used simple logic on him but he didn't even consider listening to me.

A couple was walking by us and I clearly heard them whisper something to each other before they looked after us in concern.

"Blondie, be quiet or people will think I'm kidnapping you." Raven patted the back of my thighs a few times and it sounded like he gave me the fault for people staring.

"You ARE basically kidnapping me and stop touching." I said back.

After than Raven only chuckled and continued to carry me the whole way back to the Inoue company building. At some point I just let it be and hid my face from by passing people until I was finally pulled back and landed on my feet again.

A wave of dizziness hit me for a second and I almost fell again. I could easily manage to stand but still Raven instantly supported me. His hand moving to my waist was probably out of reflex but I was aware of every spot he touched in detail. Why was I treated so nicely by him? I wasn't used to be treated like that by anyone. I felt cherished for a very small moment but it was over as soon as I pushed his hand away from my waist. It happend faster than I could think and I instantly regretted it thinking Raven thought the wrong thing... but even if he thought anything, he hid it completely but opened the door for me so I could enter.

This morning we'd already be on our plane to London... and then all the trouble would really start.