Ben Solo: Falling For Her

The lake's silvery surface that reflects even the bright moon floating in the night sky, the bright street lights that shine upon the dark pathway as they stroll, Rey's sweet scent reminding Ben of the aroma of a freshly bloomed rose; everything that makes the atmosphere between them so pleasing which felt so different.

It's been days since he met Rey. And those days made him feel insanely peculiar, yet, words aren't enough to describe it. Tonight, he couldn't imagine how this would go. He asked her out, but for why? They aren't even dating, and what he feels about her is still in a mist, considering the fact that he has no idea how it even helplessly formed up, and now making things complicated for him.

Rey is someone who Ben actually never had a care about before, starting from the very first time they met each other during the interview, until that very moment she accidentally slipped over a wet floor and fell into his arms... He  reminisces how they stared contemplatively at each other's eyes that moment, and at the same time, how her eyes sparkled as she blushed embarrassingly in front of him...

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They both stared at each other longingly, and Ben could feel Rey trembling in his arms. Her face was becoming pale, yet blushing self-consciously while she tries to get through the awkwardness surrounding them. Although flustered, her gaze was so lovely, eyes sparkling in awe. Ben couldn't help but just helplessly admire her in the midst of embarrassment.

"I-I'm sorry. I was in a hurry to your office. I didn't notice that the floor was wet." Rey uttered shakily as she stood stiffly, finding her feet.

"It's alright. Just be careful next time. You'll never know if someone's there to catch you." Ben regarded her intentionally with a faint smile, holding back the insane feeling within him.

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Also, when they both got stuck inside an elevator the entire night, it was full of emotions where they both shared and felt each other's own agony. Ben has always been alone as he grew up — alone, suffering in grief and hatred since then. It was none of what he dreamed of, and definitely not the life he expected to have. He thought no one will ever understand him; all the pain he'd been through... until that very night.

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They did everything they could do, but it was no use. Hopelessly trapped inside the elevator, Ben and Rey sat calmly in silence, patiently waiting for a possible miracle to save them.

"Rey," He called her out, "you told me you dreamed about your past. Tell me about it." Ben questioned her hesitantly, thinking it wouldn't be too bothering to do so. He was indeed curious of knowing her past, along with the remains of who Rey Kenobi really is.

"Since I was a child, I never knew of my parents. I haven't seen them, or even talked to them. As a matter of fact, I have no idea how I ended up with a fake surname, and could lie to everyone else and tell them that I'm a Kenobi, considering that I really ain't one..."

He could see the tears forming in her eyes, and yet, she was trying to prevent it from falling. But it didn't take long enough 'til those tears slowly began to well up as she wept in sorrow. Ben continued to listen with full intent. Yet, the longer it takes, the more emotional he feels. To his distress, he sensed that she was trembling uncontrollably in despair. His chest was throbbing, and so as hers. He felt pity for her — how she lamented and mourned for her own self without withholding the anguish flowing through her at last.

"...He maltreated me many times, but I tried to resist everything. All the pain he has given and caused me throughout these years..."

He couldn't dare to keep his stare at her. And bit by bit, he soon found tears began to stream down his face.

"...All my life, I've always felt like trash, hoping that my parents would return and come back for me." Rey whimpered, for she couldn't help the quiver in her voice. "I've never felt so alone."

"You're not alone." Compassionate and life-changing words blurted out as Ben uttered softly in sympathy and comfort. He do feel for Rey, and he wanted to alleviate her situation. But at first, he didn't know how. Until he reached out to her, in a way to make her feel more at ease.

Rey then held out her hand in gratitude, and they both gasped as they grasped each other's hands passionately. "Neither are you."

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Ben couldn't take his eyes off of Rey. He knew there's something special about her that creates the succession of rhythmical pulsations in his chest which makes him so soft, and his world often gradually put to a stop. And their life was parallel. All he knew was that, they both lived in solitude and violence; a manipulative life they both wanted to suppress since then. It came to his mind that they're destined to come together equally as one another's hope to rise back into the light, away from the darkness that lies within their lives.

"This place is very fulfilling. Thank you for bringing me here." Rey thanked him with great pleasure, and once again, their eyes connected undeniably with endearment.

"You're welcome. I thought you'd like it here."

"Anyway, I'm sorry about Rose." Unknowingly to him, she apologized. "She shouldn't have — you know what I meant to say, right?"

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"Rey, you never told me you have a boyfriend."

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Oh, that? Ben pinched his lips, and simpered apropos to his thought. "Yeah, she thought that we're together. But, it's no big deal to me." It's never a big deal — to him. But of course, Rey would feel ashamed since it's very uncertain and doubtful. Despite her perceptive, Ben still thinks there's nothing too concerning about it, and it wouldn't affect what he currently feels towards her.

Their conversation went on. And it was all so worth the night to spend it together.

"Also, I didn't figure that you have the guts, the intention to ask me out on a date with you. You get that?" She addresses in appreciation as she faces him. "I mean, why would you even spend half of the night with a typically redundant girl like me? Considering that I'm just a waste of your time. Besides, I'm trash and basically, I'm nothing."

I haven't been honest with you, yet I wouldn't hesitate to spend my days looking at you so thoughtfully, talking and sharing our own stories to each other. And no, you're not a waste. In fact, you mean everything to me.

From all the amorous and ardent moments they had for the past few days, he was fascinated by her in a special way, feeling something he have never felt before. Confusing it is, letting himself ask his beating heart, with the quivers in his body every so often he sees and thinks about her. It was telling him something... something that was known to exist in each and every one in this world. He then again questioned himself — could this be love?

Ben cares and has compassion for Rey, because of what he feels towards her. He usually denies it at first, although he's always been aware of it. He needs to be honest not only with himself, but also with her. He isn't anymore afraid to show it, regardless of the certainty that he might fear for the possibilities and consequences of his feelings. As a matter of fact, by now, he wants to be sincerely open about it. "You might feel and think that you don't have any place in this world. You're nothing." His words dramatically altered in the silence as he stepped an inch closer to Rey, already feeling her deep, warm breaths. "But not to me."

The tenderness was real. They both locked eyes, staring at each other so intensely with admiration. From her eyes, he took a gander and looked fixedly at her soft, rose-complexioned lips. Yet still, there was this rather point of desire that's been urging him interminably, which he couldn't withstand its irresistible potency.

Ben gradually leans in, his head starting to tilt towards hers. He was going to kiss her, and he wanted to so badly without any more reluctance, even if it seems so wrong. His hands cautiously slithered down her waist, wanting to pull her closer as he pressed his lips onto hers.

"Ben—" Rey's words went back into her throat, lost in between their intimate bond.

Ben was about to stop, pondering that it would be very inappropriate and disrespectful of him to treat her like this, especially in consideration that she would probably pull away and protest for of his stupidity. But surprisingly, she didn't. He felt her arms warily enclosing his neck, and heard her groan inside whilst her lips ceaselessly brushes with his. Breathing her breath, and her breathing his — it was so exceptional, and Ben wouldn't regret this night he had with her.