Forever Nine

1

The nurse left after giving me a sweet smile and telling me they’d be back shortly to prep me for surgery. I blew out an explosive breath, looked around the small room I’d been in since I’d entered the ED, then picked up my phone and called Holden.

He answered with nothing more than a grunt and it made me grin.

“So hey, funny story.”

Holden groaned. I fought not to laugh, but only because it would hurt.

“I had a little bit of pain, so I took a Lyft to the ED at St. Joes.” A “little bit of pain” was an understatement, but I didn’t want to sound too needy. It had been excruciating, and after the third time I’d thrown up within an hour, I figured it was time to get checked out.

Holden choked, and I wanted to tell him he should be careful when swallowing but that sounded too suggestive. Instead, I waited until he’d stopped coughing before continuing.

“And it turns out I need to have my gall bladder removed, like, um, right now. Because of a stone obstructing the duct.” I frowned. “At least I’m pretty sure that’s what they said.”

“Jesus, kid.” His voice did funny things to my insides, even if I was getting another wave of pain and he called me “kid.” Again. Even after I reminded him all the time that I definitely wasn’t a kid. I was twenty-nine, or would be in a few months on my birthday, and owned my own home. I wasn’t anywhere close to a child.

But I hurt so I let it slide. “So I’d appreciate it if you’d come here, and you know, bring me home afterward. It’s a quick procedure, the nurse said, and once I wake up and I can tolerate a drink or whatever, I can go home.”

Silence from the other end of the phone, but I could hear him breathing like a winded rhinoceros, so I knew he was still there. I stayed quiet and let him work out whatever was going through his head. I’d learned a long time ago that was the best way to get the sometimes-grumpy, always-dominant man to talk.

Holden and I shared a wall. He owned the other half of the duplex and he’d been kind and helpful when I’d moved in four years ago. I’d made a pass at him, he called me “kid” and told me to date someone my own age, and I’d kept my pining and desire hidden since. Well, as hidden as I could anyway. It was hard not to drool whenever I saw Holden McRae.

He was beautiful. Big and muscled, with wide shoulders and strong arms. He kept his dark hair shorn almost military-short, and his face clean-shaven. And the first time I saw him leave his house in leather pants and a harness strapped across his chest, I’d nearly passed out from the heat. Eventually I learned he was a Dom, but he ignored me when I said I was interested in learning about the lifestyle. That I was a submissive looking for a man to take charge. Nothing I could say would convince him, so I’d given up hope he’d ever scene with me. The truth was, I wassubmissive, and really didwant to learn. But when I’d tried to do it without Holden, it hadn’t felt right. So for the past four years, I’d been trying to forget that side of me.

It wouldn’t be ignored, but I couldn’t do anything about it.

But we’d become friends. Neighbors. We’d shared beers and coffee. Conversation in our shared backyard that we both worked to keep neat and appealing. He’d put in a pond on his half; I’d put in the patio. We didn’t share a lot, but we’d definitely gotten to a good place and I was more than happy I had his friendship.

Especially now.

“Jesse.” His voice broke into my thoughts and I gave him all my attention. Because that was his exasperated Dom voice, and whenever he used it, everything in me settled and I was one hundred percent focused on him. “Why did you call me instead of one of your eight-hundred family members?”

Because of that, right there. Because he called me “Jesse” and not “Nine,” and he actually saw me as a person instead of the baby of the family. He wasn’t kidding about having a large family. I had eight older siblings, so despite being nearly three decades old, they still treated me as if I were only three and couldn’t manage anything on my own. I loved them all to pieces, but they didn’t understand me, what I wanted, or my life. They tried and I gave them points for that. But it wasn’t enough.