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Filthy Gamer in Narutoverse

Tired of one bad choice in the personalization of his trait, Kaye, now Kai, logically planned his suicide for a better chance of reincarnation to get rid of the curse that his trait had almost become. Now, Kai is in a world where people breathe fire and fart thunder! *** Warning: I'm still playing with the idea of a female and submissive Orochimaru and if you don't think fem Orochi is a waifu with a long tongue and a quirk of swallowing things then... welp. The harem and r18 stuff will happen later because I generally write them after developing a few things but the work is at a fast pace in the terms of mc's strength and growth. Slight AU. *** I do not own the cover pic, credits to the creator. If you want me to take it down, I will.

FanHarem · Cómic
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237 Chs

Darkest Night Hidden in The Leaf (2)

As talented as Mukai is, he is far too young to understand the implications of his indifference. Was he always indifferent? No. He cared about money to use his financial development to start a family eventually. In essence, he had less 'Honorable' ambitions expected from weapons like him. Politics wasn't for him, using his genius to write a new chapter in the development of Jutsu wasn't for him, and meddling in war definitely wasn't for him.

Being a shinobi is a job.

That's all.

A job he enjoys excelling in because excellent performance leads to more jobs, hence, more money.

His reasoning may be unfounded on the Hyuga Twins, who are trying to revolutionize the social standing within their clan. But Mukai simply doesn't care. He is living through the motions. Quietly and calmly.

Given his nature, he should have implied his need for more compensation from the Hyuga Twins once someone tried to assassinate him, and he did, but for some strange reason, Mukai felt the money was a waste of his time.

He remains seated on his cushion. His dull eyes stare blankly at a piece of scroll. His hand moves the brush on the scroll's surface as he writes the meeting's minutes before setting the furled scroll on the floor.

A pale white arm snatched the scroll from the floor the next second.

Mukai's dull gaze regains a bit of brilliance as he looks around oddly.

'Hmm? A brush? What was I going to jot down… and on what exactly?' He sighs and sets the brush on the table before lying on the cold floor.

'Shit hits the fan today, eh.'

A thought from unknown origin blooms in his very soul.

'If I can't find anything interesting in Konoha, I should try looking out. But Hiruzen and others won't let me leave as easily as I'd like. Not even giving up the Byakugan will work.'

His thoughts ring no alarm in his mind. His indifference feels as simple as breathing.

'But if I do leave, I should make it engaging. The village will pursue me no matter what. Same old thing—being branded a Nuke-nin.'

A yawn escapes his lips as Mukai closes his eyes to rest. His body radiates a sense of unreal relaxation that does not befit the situation at all!

---

"A Seal, huh?" Tsunade narrows her eyes as Nawaki recounts the meeting. She has a pretty good idea who Yata's unknown associate is, and the persona in question would never contribute to something of this stature in the village without knowing the great extent of the situation.

'But he did not inform me.' Tsunade frowns secretly while Nawaki explains the workings of the seal with an impressed expression.

'He has a plan. That little bastard is devious when it comes to such matters.' She muses confidently.

'What I wonder is who's in on the situation. Kai loves having accomplices while making long-winded plans.'

Tsunade recalls when they planned Dan's downfall and recalls Kai's distaste for planning without a partner to share some laughs with.

Tsunade glances at Nono discreetly as the bespectacled teen writes whatever Nawaki speaks.

'Mikoto is busy with the Uchiha Police, Kushina is too drunk on cock for now to form coherent thoughts, Tsume's got intelligence as great as her ninken, Orochi's still acting like an indignant mother left by her man for a cart of milk, and Minato is too honest to take part in any of Kai's discreet plans. That leaves… Nono.'

And Tsunade feels that she's pretty much hit the mark.

But would she do anything about it?

Probably nothing. Tsunade has duties for the night, and the Senju Matriarch is more than glad to see her paper bitch working her way up in actual plans. Now Tsunade feels a bit of a chump.

After all, she asked Kai to make their Compound's security airlocked after cautioning him of a mysterious entity snooping around to collect information on the village. Hiruzen forbade his students to disseminate the truth to others, but Kai is Senju Clan's salient security detail, and this information pretty much belonged to him.

Only now she realizes Kai must have known about the situation long ago. Given his nature, he must have known it before Hiruzen found out.

'So, the one week I leave for my mission, he decides to discard me as his partner-in-crime and sniff Nono out?' Tsunade attends to the conversation with Nawaki through a few nasal hums while resolving internally. 'But, if I play my cards right, I can pretty much shake him down for some more vats of Somarasa~! I hear from Nono that he's pretty weak to Kushina's puppy eyes. I've got some good stuff, too!'

And there you have it—the dangers of a Kunoichi Harem. They'll drain 'ya!

Kushina is just the start, and the fact is, Tsunade has some Uzumaki coursing through her veins, too.

"What about Hiashi? How'd he take the news?" Tsunade cuts to the point.

How this night ends is upto the Hyuga Clan, or so the vast majority of Shinobi believe. But the truth cannot be far from it. Tsunade is aware of how devious her Sensei can be at such times. After all, he once turned a blind eye to the silent assassination of the prominent Senju shinobi by his war buddy. While Tsunade admits things will never go the way they were before, Hiruzen is not the same as he was a decade ago, too. Nawaki demonstrates the sentiment with a very strange expression.

"Once Yata Uchiha explained how his seal performed similar functions as the Caged Bird Seal, Hiashi Hyuga loudly condemned the village and accused the Uchiha Clan of stealing Hyuga Clan's secrets. When Lord Third tried to calm him down, Hiashi accused Lord Third of spitting in the face of Grandfather's promises to the Hyuga Clan. Lord Third ordered the temporary imprisonment of Hiashi Hyuga, but he disarmed the three anbu members fairly easily before attacking Mukai Kohinata."

Even Nono looks up with an odd glint in her eyes which she hides quickly. She would have hidden it from Tsunade if not for the latter already stalking Nono's reaction.

"Mukai is dead?" Tsunade questions.

"No, Hizashi Hyuga intercepted his elder twin and sealed the man's chakra in a flurry of movement."

Tsunade digests the information.

"Lord Third ordered Hiashi and his wife to be confined by the Anbu members. Meanwhile, Lord Third asked Hizashi and Yata to follow him after adjourning the meeting."

"And the conclusion?" Tsunade leans forward slightly.

Nawaki gulps softly.

"Lord Third announced that these trying times may have a large hand in Hiashi's 'stress-induced' outburst, and Mukai agreed with this assessment. However, Mukai will accept the seal Heavenly Blessing-Earthly Restriction instead of the Caged Bird Seal. He also conveyed another meeting and sent two Anbu members to the Hyuga Elders to demand a response for Hiashi's actions."

Tsunade nods calmly.

"And what were you doing when Hiashi went berserk?" She questions out of nowhere.

Nawaki blinks before replying naturally.

"I had ten shadow clones around me the moment the Anbu members flickered in the room."

He adds with an annoyed expression.

"You really broke my natural reaction, Onee-san! I felt dumb having such a freaked-out reaction!"

Tsunade smirks at his words and replies fondly.

"You'll have all the time you need to act composed when you survive worse situations than this. And believe me, others in the room felt more of a fool than you when they saw a kid half their age having a better reaction time than them."

Nawaki carefully considers Tsunade's words and nods. He then vibrates in his seat hesitantly.

"Out with it."

"What's with the evacuation? All the civilians and genins are relocated. Shouldn't we be preparing for a predicted attack more carefully? All this feels so… lethargic."

Tsunade smiles at her brother quietly before shrugging.

"You'll be told what to do when the time comes. Nono is the same. She knows nothing either."

Tsunade turns to look at her assistant with a narrowed gaze.

"It truly is annoying," Nono asserts with a sweet smile.

---

"I apologize from the depths of my heart to have kept this from you."

Hiashi whispers to a dark-haired, fair-skinned woman. Her looks are traditional, close to the likes of Mikoto Uchiha, and for a reason. Clans like Uchiha and Hyuga groom their clanswoman, especially their princesses, in all the traditional values to plaster a face of demurity. The Sharingan's existence makes it harder for the Uchiha Clan's women to remain as demure and submissive as possible, but Byakugan has no such emotional issues.

Hon Hyuga, Hiashi's wife, and distant relative is one such woman. Cared after by attendants from the branch family, Hon was groomed to be the perfect wife for the next clan patriarch. Neither Hiashi nor Hon got any say in whom they were to marry. But it did not matter to the duo.

Marrying according to their elder's will is the price of being a Main Family Member. And as fortune would have it, both of them faced no marital issues. Hiashi kept his professional and personal life separate, learning this from his young twin to become a better husband. Meanwhile, Hon gave no reason for anyone to complain about her.

The two remain seated in a confined room. It truly is a prison cell in the Uchiha Police Building.

But Hokage's order of leaving the two with sufficient furniture and privacy makes his intention clear to Fugaku. And a personal word with Yata persuaded Fugaku to clear the floor entirely as two Anbu members guard the prison bars.

"Please do not lower your head," Hon supplies softly. "You did what you believed right for the Clan."

Hiashi works his jaw and then clenches his fist.

"I cannot speak further of it. But I'm relieved to know your trust in my actions. I–"

He takes a shuddering breath. He already knows how this will end for him. While it would have been unacceptable for the young and past him, Hiashi understands what he needs to do.

Hon casts her gaze on her husband before smiling gently and reaching out to overlap his clenched fists on the table with her warm and supple hands.

"Dear, nothing you can do will make me repulsed by you. Nothing. Bear that in mind and act appropriately. And know this—I shall be right behind you when circumstances become too hard to bear."

Hiashi locks his gaze with his wife's equally lilac eyes before nodding quietly.

"Follow the guard's lead in time. They understand the situation, and your safety is their greatest mission. They will lead you back to the evacuation point later."

Hiashi stands and straightens his back. He half-turns before leaving and questions, "Do you feel free?"

Hon blinks in surprise, but the answer is surprisingly easy.

"Freedom is a luxury not many can afford. I don't believe freedom is necessary for our life. Peace is."

"Are you peaceful?" Hiashi whispers.

"With you, I am."

He nods quietly and leaves. The Anbu members don't stand in his way as he flickers away from the open window of the floor.

Silence descends on the floor as two masked Anbu secure the prison gate while Hon closes her eyes and lets time flow by without an ounce of anxiety.

---

Eagle, or precisely, Enma's Sarutobi's duty is to locate the few Shinobi specifically asked by Shikudo. The Leader of Anbu won't have any issues with other clans, but finding Kushina was hard until she let her presence known from Tsunade's manor. That wasn't all. Enma had to deliver a sealed scroll to Kai, who happened to be with Kushina, as the duo enjoyed bowls of milk and fruit in Tsunade's kitchen.

He couldn't stop, however. The specific seal of the Kage made it clear that the mission on the scroll is the duo's priority, and he left the Senju Compound soon after to travel along the Naka River cutting through Konoha. He enters a specific sealed entrance within the Forest of Death and travels through the underground passage to exit into a spacious chamber covered in grey-brown tiles. His gaze rests on the laughing and giggling group of four sitting around a short-legged table with cards and literary pornography set on its surface.

"Yo, Eagle. We're sharing stupid stories from our time in the academy. Wanna join?" Jiraiya looks back with a casual smirk as the successors of the Yamanaka, Akimichi, and Nara Clans have different reactions.

Inoichi and Choza wave at the Anbu Leader casually while Shikaku yawns and slumps his upper body on the table.

"I'm about done sharing stories. Just wake me up when it's absolutely vital. If possible, just find my old man. He's far more responsible."

"I shared the necessary orders with Kai and Kushina Uzumaki. What next?" Eagle questions sternly.

Jiraiya huffs and questions, "What's the result of the patrol?"

"No presence on or under the ground. The river is clean, too."

Jiraiya scratches his chin thoughtfully before nodding.

"Great, send half of my share of Anbu to Orochimaru's side."

Eagle and others still.

Once the mysterious organization targeting them became the prime suspect, the former members of Root, suspended from the force after suspicions of Sakumo's disappearance fell on Danzo, returned to Anbu. As things are, Hiruzen has divided these forces under Jiraiya's, Orochimaru's, and Tsunade's command, who have decision-making power unless Shikudo or Hiruzen step in personally.

"A half?" Eagle confirms. For the moment, he fell under Tsunade's command, so he had no say in the deployment of his organization's members.

These are extraordinary times, so Eagle can only accept the situation, but he advises patiently once Jiraiya nods.

"That will leave the village partially blind with the lack of scouts."

Jiraiya smirks and whistles loudly.

"Did you set up?"

A weak voice musters from the dark corner of the chamber.

"I did *gero.* I've got my eyes around the village." The soft croaking voice announces, "But my children cannot sense chakra just yet. Leave the sensors and some useful scouts to spread out… I'll inform you when I see something unusual."

Eagle gazes at the palm-sized cloaked grey frog with a bushy white beard. Unlike usual toad eyes, this toad has insectoid compound eyes that stare back creepily.

"Thanks, Gamamata!" Jiraiya grins and looks at Eagle. "Send my half to Orochimaru and tell… him to remain prepared. If anything happens, the first assault will be a speedy affair. What's Tsunade doing?"

"She is in her office filing the renewed wills of her clansmen."

Jiraiya thins his lips and massages his head.

"Sounds like a headache."

"Anything else?" Eagle curtly questions.

Jiraiya ponders for a moment and reaches into his clothes to retrieve another small scroll.

"This one is for Fugaku. The remaining scrolls are already assigned. Return to your position after this."

Eagle scoffs and flickers away.

"That man has no joy in his life," Jiraiya comments as Inoichi supplants. "Well, we shouldn't judge a book by its cover."

Jiraiya looks at his subordinates for this catastrophic mission as his lips twitch in annoyance. Someone like Orochimaru would have been a better choice to lead the current generation of the ino-shika-cho team. But he can't complain over spilled milk.

"Stay sharp." Jiraiya cautions while leaving his seat to walk into the lower chamber.

"Staying sharp won't help, though," Choza bites on his snack. "We can't move unless we get a signal from the detection team."

Meanwhile, Jiraiya enters the said Detection Team's chamber within the Hokage Residence.

A Hokage's Residence is used for anything but a residence. Hiruzen resides in his Clan's compound or his office most of the time, as the Kage residence is a sealed structure used to store multiple Jutsu and documents alongside housing Konoha's Barrier team.

The Barrier Team is divided into two teams, the Interception and Detection Team.

The current generation of Ino-Shika-Cho led by Jiraiya is the Interception Team.

The detection team resides on the lower floor where Jiraiya observes the globe of floating chakra controlled by a group of Fuin-shinobi cultivated by Konoha to devise fuin ingenuity in-house.

These three middle-aged men are garbed in long white robes from head to toe as the central shinobi is seated between four earthen spikes. The other two shinobi look at Jiraiya and nod respectfully, but the one in the center focuses on the globe of water.

Jiraiya looks at the sphere of water quietly.

As impressive as a Barrier around the village sounds, this ingenuity is far from complete. Yes, there is a thin layer of barrier around the village made of intangible chakra, but it cannot stop any attack. This enormous barrier works alongside the small liquid sphere hovering not far from Jiraiya, thanks to the seals shaping it.

What this barrier does is register foreign chakra and reveal its position on the water sphere controlled by the Detection Team under the Hokage Residence.

But differentiating the Chakra of the village's force from the foreign entity is easier said than done. No spy could have entered if this barrier was foolproof.

And as if the differentiation of enemies from allies isn't hard enough, this barrier faces other weaknesses, such as the enemy shinobi's ability to mask their chakra. This use is rather common within the ranks of Jonins and elites. Even Jiraiya is prone to suppressing his chakra when traveling in other lands.

Not only Konoha but other villages have similar ambitions to secure their privacy, but necessary ingenuity still isn't invented. So, the village settled for detecting any odd concentration of chakra from the other side of the barrier.

Jiraiya did not consider this a dead job. He's Hiruzen's eyes and ears outside the village, and Konoha is aware of how other villages have stunningly similar seals in development, no thanks to the scrolls present on their doorsteps every odd day.

His job is to ensure that their enemies don't catch them by surprise, and Jiraiya has a pretty good idea of the enemy's mode of transportation.

"Any news?"

"The village's jinchuriki left the restricted spot of the Senju Clan alongside another source of chakra noted as Jonin Kai. They are traveling to Hokage's Office."

Jiraiya nods and listens to other updates before determining a lack of any action from their side.

'The Senju Clan's seals even restrict Sensei's Telescope Technique,' Jiraiya muses while returning to the upper floor. 'Kai would have made one hell of a sealing leader of the village, but can't expect one kid to shoulder all things. He's already training with Kushina to help her control the Kyubi to a moderate extent while lending a hand to Orochimaru's research. Not to mention having a team to train…' Jiraiya shakes his head.

Jiraiya himself was adept in seals but not the detection kind. After all, his sealing knowledge did not stem from any clan. He's a self-taught Fuinjutsu practitioner.

'Minato will make a heck of an initiative.' Jiraiya furrows his brows soon.

'While Minato's chakra reserves lack in intensity, he should be starting his sage training. What's with that Old Toad still sleeping and not giving the green light?' The Sannin quietly sits beside his team, deep in thought.

'And I can't just use the same excuse as Minato being the child of prophecy to excavate more from the Forbidden Scroll. Minato needs contribution to learn more things. Sensei should understand his drive to innovate after Taiyogan's fiasco, so he'll give Minato a shot in trying to do something out of this Barrier Seal. That's the least I can do before leaving the village one final time after weathering this storm.'

Since his freedom will be greatly restricted after the beginning of the predicted war, Jiraiya has to make a final trip around the different lands and settle a few things.

"The silence is stifling."

Choza comments.

"You get used to it," Jiraiya smiles thinly. "Else, you know other ways to relax your nerves if you don't get used to it."

Shikaku blearily looks up and mutters, "It's just silence. It's a terrific environment for sleeping. So, can we just put our heads in the game and keep quiet?"

Jiraiya, Choza, and Inoichi look at each other before announcing simultaneously.

"No."

---

"Tailed Beast Bomb…" Kushina hesitates with Kai, Minato, and Tsume one step behind her.

Hiruzen nods calmly and awaits Kushina's response.

"Like you practiced. Lie through your teeth. A slut and a liar aren't mutually exclusive." Kyubi haunts the redhead's mind as her lips twitch, something she uses to her advantage by presenting a conflicted look.

"I've trained a lot with Kai, dattebane. I used to lose control, but now, I can pull enough chakra to go one-tail without snapping. A Tailed Beast Bomb takes too much chakra."

Hiruzen looks past Kushina and questions Kai, "Can I trust you to handle Kushina-kun going out of control?"

"We'll be fine as long as she's under six-tails state," Kai nods calmly. "But Lord Third… if all you want is destructive power, we have a better way."

Hiruzen looks at Minato before shaking his head.

"That technique cannot be mobile, right? You four know of the situation that we predict an invasion. We expect a Jinchuriki, a Jinchuriki capable of mass destruction. We need an equivalent counter once you get your signals."

Kai looks at Minato and gestures to the boy with a tilt of his head.

"What?" Hiruzen makes a curious sound as Minato nods and steps forward.

"Lord Third… I have devised a jutsu. Here." He sets a palm-sized scroll on the desk for Hiruzen to peruse through.

Hiruzen continues through the scroll before his eyes widen slightly and he sighs.

"This technique is untested. I cannot—"

"Actually, Lord Third, Minato, and I brainstormed a few possibilities while our teams trained together. I have a similar prototype planned."

Planned, not developed—Hiruzen notes.

"And I can complete this jutsu with no margin of error in execution."

While Kai knows very well that Kushina may never lose her control, he understood that she still hasn't mastered the Tailed Beast Bomb. And, to be honest, he couldn't just let Hiruzen assume that he could command his lover to a hysterical state.

Hiruzen's trust in Kai is unmatched at this point. Hiruzen questions while perusing through the scroll again, "And Minato-kun, is it alright with you if Kai masters this technique?"

"Kai's contributions were necessary for me to get to the ground floor for this seal, Lord Third," Minato replies softly. He is happy his contributions are recognized, but now isn't the time or place to act cheerfully.

Hiruzen thins his lips.

"This technique will allow us to mitigate needlessly losses. But this also makes your team the most mobile. How do you plan on coping with that?"

Kai fishes his hand in his glorious shinobi fanny pack along his hips and takes out twenty senbons with tiny seals engraved on their thin surfaces.

"Again, this is Minato's idea. But if you spread these twenty senbon needles in the village, I'll be able to teleport to them at a moment's notice. Lord Third, if I understand correctly, our team is to intercept major attacks using Kushina. While I can seal Kushina, the enemies may have another trump card up their sleeves aimed at Jinchuriki."

Hiruzen narrows his eyes and looks at the rest of the gathered shinobi.

"I'd like to have a word with Kai alone."

Kushina and others quietly retreat as Hiruzen cuts to the chase, "You don't want Kushina's life to be at risk. Is that it?"

Kai shakes his head.

"If that were the case, I'd be making cases about why Mikoto shouldn't be at the Police Station right now, or why Tsunade should evacuate with the rest of the girls. My point is that Kyubi is unpredictable. One thing I understand from facing a berserk Kushina in small spaces is that the Kyubi has a more dangerous way to use its Tailed-Beast Bomb. What you will be doing by placing Kushina in the middle of the combat, is betting on Kyubi's sensibility."

Hiruzen narrows his eyes and leans back on his chair.

"What do you propose?"

"I'm sure you have information and plans outside my knowledge, but I can deal with Tailed Beast Bombs. Minato, Tsume, and Kushina's presence is spent better elsewhere."

"I cannot risk Kushina with others. Tsunade has assured me that you are more than capable of handling a Jinchuriki. But you and Kushina alone may get distracted."

Kai doesn't dissuade Hiruzen's fears and nods slightly.

"That's possible. I didn't mean to ask for going solo, Lord Third. I just wanted to emphasize that there are better ways of dealing with a Tailed Beast Bomb, in my opinion. But I wouldn't trust Minato's and Tsume's current skills against a tempered enemy Jinchuriki should we face one."

"But they can assist you, right?"

"Yes."

Hiruzen begins to tap his table with his index finger.

"I will be frank with you only because I expect you to assume my responsibilities someday. I expect a Kage and a Jinchuriki to be present in the predicted attack. And as of now, we aren't aware of the actual invasion plan. All possible mode of travel on the ground is checked and cleared."

"That leaves the air and space-time ninjutsu like the summoning Jutsu." Kai nods.

"Indeed. Once you deal with the expected Bijudama, chances are that the enemy Kage will intercept you."

Kai nods and questions, "How long does my team need to hold them?"

"Until my arrival."

"Well, the Dragon Sennin is known to be stronger than the Sannin of the village, right? But his bounty barely matches the claim. I suppose tackling a Kage will be an appropriate wake-up call for other Villages to fear the strangely masked shinobi."

Kai presents a quirky grin.

A grin that relieves Hiruzen's tense nerves slightly.

"Konoha's Dragon Sennin," Hiruzen corrects the youth.

"Tch, a cheap political ploy."

"Ploys you're expected to utilize to their greatest extent once you sit in my position."

Hiruzen chuckles and heaves loudly.

"Lord Third, are you alright?" Kai finally questions with faux concern. Well, he didn't particularly dislike Hiruzen for his past weakness. Hey, everyone's a human, right? Mistakes aren't unfounded to humankind.

"I'll be fine once we weather this. Call your team back. I'll have to adjust a few orders that I'd like you to relay once you leave my offices."

***

Alternate Title: The Calm Before the Storm; Locked Patriarch; Better a Fool than Being Unprepared; Failed Negotiations; Startling Indifference; Indifferent Undercurrents; Where's the Scroll?; Incomplete Barrier; Minato Didn't Waste His Time at All; Standing Up for Kushina; The Dragon Sennin Rises Again; Not Freedom But Peace; Determined Hiashi; All for the Sake of Clan; Silence is Required to Sleep!; Eagle's Annoyance; Surplus of Anbu; Expected Conflict; Air? Summons? Both?; Faux Concern is still a Concern; Muddying Kyubi's Honorable Name

***

A/N: Bruh, Hiashi gonna get that Itachi treatment.

***

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