Harry's Painful Confession

"I still hear him," He said in a soft and quiet voice. "sometimes his voice rings in my head."

"Voldemort?!" Dumbledore asked with wide eyes. "What does he say?"

"No," Harry shook his head. "not Voldemort, I'm talking about Vernon Dursley."

"What?" Dumbledore blinked.

"Occasionally Petunia and Dudley as well." Harry added as his fists tightened. "Their voices, they ring in my head, they scream, they cry, they pound against my skull. I can never tell if they're trying to break in or break out, but they keep pounding. If I'm not distracted with something, if I don't think about something then they jump at the opportunity to remind me of them."

"From when your family died," Dumbledore frowned. "I understand that..."

"You understand nothing!" Harry cut Dumbledore off, the old man nearly jumped back at the venom in Harry's voice, Harry took a very deep and slow breath before speaking. "I...it's not from when they died, I hear their voice from when they were alive."

"I...I don't know what you mean."

"Then for once, shut up and listen to me, don't think you know anything and just shut up." Harry sighed, he continued speaking, his voice sounded detached from all emotions. "The Dursley's were quite fond of physical abuse, after a while I got used to it, just shut up and take the pain, let them get it out of their systems, don't show weakness and wait until they let me leave the room. But...it was their verbal and emotional abuse that hurt the worst.

I...I don't like sudden loud noises, I hate shouting. When...when they shouted...it would stick in-between my ears. It wouldn't go away, it didn't matter if I cried, it didn't matter if I shut my eyes and hid in the dark, their shouts and screams echo in my head. Most of the time I don't even remember the words, just the loud raised voices. My head throbs and my veins pop when I think about it. I hear my aunt calling my mother a whore, I can hear my uncle screaming that I'm a freak, I can hear my cousin yelling at me." Harry paused to take a deep breath. "I...they don't stop screaming. Even when they died, I thought they would stop screaming at me...but they haven't. They keep...screaming...they keep...shouting. Shouting...screaming...yelling...insulting...degrading...frightening...all in my head thanks to years of abuse that I have suffered because of you." Harry said, his voice had never gained a single bit of emotion while he had talked. "I fear hearing their voices in my head more than I fear Voldemort. After all of this time I still can't get them out of my head, and whenever I asked you, no when I begged you to stop sending me back to them you patted me on the head, told me to stop exaggerating and sent me back along. I like to think that I am a fair and forgiving man, but if you think that I would ever forgive you after all I have suffered because of you, then you are an idiot. As far as I'm concerned there is never, and I mean never, a good excuse to abuse a child or put one in an abusive house hold.

And when I come to Hogwarts, away from their abuse, you let Malfoy and his gang pick up the slack through bullying because you don't want to punish them and teach them consequences, and if that's not enough then you have your death eater spy who has been abusing me since the start of school but that was apparently fine as well since he had 'your full trust'. If it means ending Voldemort then I will work with you but do not ever think that I will forgive you." Harry finished with a glare strong enough to burn magical ice.

Dumbledore remained silent, part of him hoped that Harry was simply overreacting but it was hard, near impossible, to think that he was. Dumbledore didn't get much time to think about it however as Fawkes flew into the room and landed on a nearby chair. Dumbledore had realized that his phoenix companion hadn't seen Harry in a long time.

Fawkes stared at Harry, judging him, Harry fearlessly stared back, or he was at least fearless on the outside. After a tense silence Fawkes trilled before flying over to the armrest on Harry's chair and rubbing his head against Harry's face.

Dumbledore breathed a sigh of relief, phoenix's were light creatures and as everyone knew they despised darkness, if Fawkes trusted him then that meant that Harry was still good enough to be the hero that Dumbledore needed.

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