Mind Reader

Wait. What?

He said he could read what others were thinking. Did I get that right?

It was said so casually as if he only told me he knew how to cook. It freaks me out. 

I still had some doubts until he explained it to me.

"You thought of leaving this room, right?"

"Y-yes."

Everything about the situation now seemed weird to me. I think I messed up with the address. Now, I am dealing with a lunatic. Or maybe this house is an asylum, which explains the gates and the garden.

"How insulting," he said while directly looking at me. "I told you. I am not insane."

For a few moments, I felt numb. 

"I understand if you don't believe me. Even if I'm not a mind reader, it was obvious from your reaction that you still doubted what I said."

"So you're not a mind reader," I said, hoping he was only joking.

"I wish," he answered with a solemn look on his face. It happened so quickly. As soon as I blinked, he was back to being chill. "Whether I am a mind reader or not does not concern you, anyway."

He is right. But it still blew my mind. I mean, I only knew about people with psychic skills through television. Or whenever I watched some weird documentaries when I was bored. Things like this only exist in a fictional world. Right?

"So, now, I am not real?"

Shit! "I did not say it," I defended myself. Somehow, I do not want to offend the stranger.

"But you are thinking about it. I can hear your thoughts loud and clear, you know."

I might be in a dangerous situation. I did not know any self-defense, and I knew I could not run faster than anyone. But I could try.

I must get out of here! 

"I already told you. You shouldn't do that."

I stopped listening to him and looked at the door near us.

He held my hand. 

I was expecting a firm grip. 

But it was a light touch. It was as if the stranger was trying to calm me down.

"I thought if I would be honest, you might understand my situation," he said in a softer voice. "But it seemed you only think of yourself and not other people."

I was stunned. It was as if this person slapped me in the face.

And instead of a numbing effect, my rage started to build up inside me. It was another misconception about me that I do not like to hear.

It reminded me of that time I argued with my ex-boyfriend during college. He told me that I am self-centered. It hurts to hear it. It was shocking to hear again, even if it had a softer blow. But I learned from that experience, so it should no longer bother me.

I take a deep breath.

"Are you not the same?" I asked before looking at him. "You were also just thinking about yourself."

He flinched. He reacted negatively.

"But it was not that bad, right?" I continued before he exploded. "It was not wrong to think about yourself before you decided to think about somebody else."

"Are you saying it is okay to be selfish?" he asked while slightly teasing me.

"Being selfish and selfless is confusing, right? We are labeled selfish if we refuse to give in to what others want. We are selfless when we give everything to the people we love. But being selfish could mean you are prioritizing your well-being. And being selfless could mean having no concern for oneself. So if we say someone is selfish, it was hard to justify someone is bad or good."

He looked at me as if I surprised him the way he did when I heard him say he was a mind reader. 

"You are really not one of those people," he whispered as if relieved. 

And I am unsure if I heard him correctly. 

Before I could ask for clarification, he spoke in a clear voice. He also looks apologetic.

"Please listen to me, okay? I did not mean to scare you. I just ran out of options and decided to be honest with you. It was not easy for me to do this. But since I needed your help. Please. I am begging you. Stay. At least for a little while." 

The stranger beside me looks sincere. He seemed to be running out of options. I did not notice it before. Like me, he was panicking, too. But that is because he was hiding from someone. On the other hand, I was panicking because I found him weird.

Sometimes, it was hard to see another person as another human being. I often forget to care because when I do, I do it to the point that I tend to forget myself. I am selfish and selfless. I could not balance both.

It was a flaw I kept trying to correct. I kept telling myself I should try to spend more time with other people. But that does not imply trusting a total stranger.

But I often wonder, do we know when exactly to give our complete trust to someone? Or should we only trust ourselves?

I looked at his hand, which was still touching me. We were both squatting as we thought of what to do next.

"But you know," he said as if he remembered something he must tell me. "I expect you will freak out. It was bound to happen when people believe I am a mind reader," he tried making it sound casual. 

And he seemed relaxed about it. But he also does not know what to do when somebody suddenly is scared of him or is unsure how to deal with him.

Somehow, we are the same.

He instantly looked at me as if I had said something that surprised him.

Shit. He knew what I was thinking.

He smiled.

"You seemed calmer now. Did you stop freaking out?"

"I did not freak out. I was just shocked," I lied while trying to remain calm on the outside but panicking on the inside.

He looked at me in a way that he was like saying: "I don't believe you." Or, "Yeah, right. Keep telling that to yourself." 

What the hell? Am I also becoming a mind reader?

But then, what was the point in hiding my embarrassment? It was an instant response, I guess. 

"Well, okay, I freaked out. As you said, it was normal. What type of reaction will you expect anyway from this situation?"

"I don't know. Thankful, maybe? Because I am being honest."

Honesty isn't the best policy, you know.

"Why not?" he asks innocently.

I held my forehead and tried to distance myself from him. I even extended my hand in front of him as if that would be enough to protect me from his mind-reading ability. Or skills? Power?

"Stop. It. Now. Is this how you normally talk to people?"

"Normally, people are sweet to me because they find my looks appealing. Then they would say they find me charming, and some would flirt with me. It was the first time I told someone I did not know that I was a mind reader. So this is something new even for me. Oh! It's also the first time someone was mesmerized by me and thought about my flawless skin."

I was stunned. 

He clearly saw my reaction earlier. I felt like I no longer had my privacy.

"I was mesmerized because you were not what I expected to see. And your skin does look flawless."

He laughed at me. He knew I was uncomfortable, but we still talked in hushed voices. But, if given another choice, I might have yelled at him. And that seemed to entertain him.

"Please don't think I am doing this deliberately," he explained. He is still trying not to laugh loudly. "Sometimes I can't help it. I have no control over what other people think about me. But maybe you are right. I am not a mind reader because I do not read thoughts. As I said, I hear them. I can only hear what others are thinking if their thoughts are related to me and if that person is near."

So, if I think about myself, he will not know it.

"If I could not hear your thoughts while we are together, I would know you are not thinking anything about me," he said while smiling.

I look at him sharply. He read or heard my thoughts again.

How can I not think about him? Damn it!

But then he said there was another option.

"So, how far should I be before you stop hearing what I'm thinking about you?"

He grabbed the sleeve of my jacket and held it firmly.

"I thought it was clear that you cannot leave yet."

No, it wasn't.

"Fine. I'll explain it then," the stranger said. He also let go of my jacket. "You may ask me anything you'd like to know."