Ch437. Fanfictions?

Rei wasn't interested in talking more with the Daimyos. He definitely was not gonna argue with them if this plan was stupid or not. They will see for themselves once everything is said and done.

After all, he already got a report through the telepathic connection he had with Kaguya that the invasion of Kumo and Iwa had already started.

Stupid? Pfft.

Nobody in Konoha was in any real danger. Rei was hundred percent sure of that. He had that much faith in his sealing skills. And in exchange for roughing up Konoha a bit, the last two major hidden villages not under his rule would be suppressed enough to never become a problem again. All that while everybody was fixated on what was going on in Konoha.

It was a nice strategic sleight of hand and if he didn't have the two biggest trading companies, Konan's perfect spying, many interesting seals that could conceal loads of important things, and thorough knowledge of how the information network of hidden villages worked, it would have never been possible to accomplish.

The only Daimyo he would not mind speaking with was the Fire one, and even that was because he seemed genuine in his appreciation of the friendship between him and Tsunade. While the Wind one had a similar relationship with Pakura... Rei couldn't find a guy with over fifty consorts and past desire for one of his women likable.

Call it pettiness if you will but...

Rei was barely managing to keep his girls happy. How could the dude do fifty!? Life was friggin unfair sometimes!

And no. He was definitely not pouting, huffing, nor was he cutely scowling no matter what Konan said as they were leaving the room.

He didn't see it so it can't be true. Period.

"So? What are we gonna do? Any plan or aim?" Konan asked, her voice slightly excited while her amber eyes sparkled expectantly as she looked at Rei.

She might not mind doing paperwork every day but she wouldn't say no to more... exciting ninja stuff.

Not even causing a massacre seemed all that bad after a few years of 'desk duty'. No wonder every Kage was a murderous bastard.

Rei questioningly raised his eyebrow at her, "How would you come to that conclusion? We are just tourists here." He innocently tilted his head, making Konan snort a laugh at his answer.

"Well, you usually have one of those during chaotic times like these." Konan offhandedly remarked after she stopped her brief laughing. Her tone suddenly flipped back to an excited one, "Remember how we first met Pakura? The entire Sunagakure could not calmly sleep for at least a month afterward! And how much chaos we caused when we were going around as Yozora, getting the samples of the bijuu chakra?" A content and nostalgic smile appeared on Konan's lips, "We plunged the entire Elemental Nations into chaos and made them chase ghosts so we could calmly focus on building up our hidden village. Ah, fun times."

Rei's lips twitched at that. While true, it was not his aim at that time. To be completely honest, causing chaos was fun. That's why he did it. Not because of some scheme with so many twists even Orochimaru with his special predisposition would not be able to wrap his head around it.

"Now that you mention it, we really do thrive during the chaos, don't we?" Rei idly spoke with an awkward smile. "But no. There is nothing to do in Konoha. No foe that would require our attention, no vault worth our time to steal from, and no person worthy to be kidnapped." He sighed and looked towards the horizon, seeing Konoha in all of its beauty, even if it was marred by lots of fighting on the streets and several houses burning.

'No need for such things as we already own this village.' Rei added in his head as he frowned, 'But damn if this plan won't cause the need for a lot of costly repairs. I wonder who will pay for that.' His eyes briefly wandered in Konan's direction as he knew Tsunade was too stingy to use her own pocket money.

After all, there was this thing called work-related expenses... 'And Konan will not be happy with her for that. Family drama is incoming. Oh, joy.' Rei mused.

Then again, those were always fun to watch. He would have to remember to make a lot of popcorn. Kaguya was an expensive rabbit to keep and feed. Especially when she was amused. No doubt would she demand some refreshments for the show.

Unfortunately for Rei, she learned the invincible puppy-dog eye technique and it worked damn well with her Byakugan eyes. Evil thing, that.

'And she just had to get interested in seduction techniques on top of picking Mei as her teacher. Talk about a recipe for a disaster.' Rei's awkward smile became a bit forced, 'At least I have the mental connection with her and can be certain she would only try to practice those techniques on me. I guess that's a plus.'

The men of Elemental Nations should thank him for that. Kaguya would sooner crush them to death in irritation than woo them.

'Now that's a funny mental picture. If she was not mine I would definitely want to see that.' Rei amusedly thought.

"I guess, we suffer from the exact same thing in these fancy fantasy scrolls, don't we?" Konan giggled. But when she saw Rei had no idea what she was talking about, she decided to explain a bit. It wasn't weird he didn't read it. He was a guy. Expecting a sense of art from him would be too much.

"The main characters in these stories usually make themselves so powerful and have so many capable subordinates that in the end, they have nothing to do." Konan explained.

Rei continued looking at her weirdly, 'Since when does Elemental Nations have fanfiction?' He inwardly thought in shock.

'More importantly, how come I don't know about it!? So much value for entertainment wasted!' Rei got excited and was about to ask where she read those stories when...

"Unfortunately, the fantasy scrolls are just fanciful kiddy scrabble compared to real life." Konan cluelessly continued with a sigh, "It was less interesting than the accounting books of the Biri-Biri company."

"You meant to use them as an excuse to slack off while still appearing like you're working." Rei deadpanned, knowing that technique from his past life. Having a book in front of you helped make you seem busy as long as people could not discover what exactly that book is.

Konan slightly blushed and turned her head away, "I have no idea what you are talking about. You must be mistaken. My work ethics are nothing but diligence incarnate. How could you accuse me of slacking off, I would never know." She huffed but Rei could clearly see the twitch of her lips.

She was totally lying.

Rei sighed and rubbed his forehead in frustration, "Just tell me this..." He hopefully pleaded in a quiet tone, "were those stories really that bad you rather did your work than read them?"

An awkward silence spread between them, and the only noise interrupting it was coming from all the fighting around them.

Rei was anxious for the answer. Getting entertainment from books was really hard for the current him. The ninja life spoiled most of the local fantasy genre because, in a way, he lived in a fantasy book. There was no reason to read about heroes with special abilities when you were a killer with special abilities.

Just... boring.

But fanfictions? That could actually be a bit interesting, no? These tended to go beyond common sense even if it meant sounding dumb as heck!

That's why he hoped for a no from Konan but fate is never really kind.

"Yes." Konan delivered the final judgment and Rei instantly knew he would not enjoy them.

If Konan preferred doing her least favorite part of being CEO rather than reading these things, they must have been exceptionally bad. Webnovel level bad. Marvel fanfictions level bad. Or worse.

While Rei had already forgotten most of the fanfictions he had read in his past life, he still remembered these references.

It... was just not worth it.

---

Author Note:

Yeaaah, I am taking a jab at the webnovel fanfictions as of late.

Do you have the same problem as me? At the time I wrote this chapter, there seemed to be no good new fanfic. Nothing I could be excited to read about.

I have a few personal likes but... I simply feel that in the past, there was a bigger variety of interesting stories coming out.

Sad, really.