The Trip

By the time Liu Zijian entered the twins' room, he was greeted with an absent minded wife who was swaying her right arm inside the crib in a rhythmic manner. The left arm was holding a small box with a simple design.

Liu Zijian loomed over the crib and his lips curled upwards.

The twins were holding Han Meixiu's fingers. One was gripping the pinky and the other one was holding the forefinger.

The two cute little angels were seemingly sending a message to their absent minded mother.

"They are awake." Liu Zijian softly said.

His voice made Han Meixiu's attention back to reality.

"Ah, right. How long have you been here?" Han Meixiu asked before carefully placing the box to the nearby table and picking up one of the twins. 

"I just came. Li Xiaozhi already left?" Liu Zijian asked after seeing the box. It must have been her gift.

"En." Han Meixiu fell into a trance again after answering.

"What did you talk about?" 

"Just her usual ramblings and her plans..." Han Meixiu answered and looked at the man picking up the little princess.

"Does it involve you or your parents?" 

Liu Zijian pretty much knew the things that could make his wife act this way. 

"She wanted to still investigate them. It's either she really didn't believe they're supposed to be dead or she wanted to know what happened during the time they were missing."

Han Meixiu was fully aware with Li Xiaozhi's character. Once she doubted something, she would exert all her efforts to relieve that doubt. Aside from this, she once promised her that she would help her find her parents. 

But Han Meixiu couldn't just plainly say she already met them.

Li Xiaozhi is a police officer with a strong sense of justice.  

And precisely this is the reason why she couldn't say anything to her.

"Whatever your decision is, I'll support you." Liu Zijian answered. 

"I know." Han Meixiu murmured and smiled softly.

She looked at the box again. It contained a pair of jade pendant. The design was simple and elegant but the material used was really good. It must have cost quite a lot. 

Han Meixiu could actually imagined Li Xiaozhi's crying face when she was buying the gift. As a frugal person, she must have spent a long time letting go this little treasure.

It simply showed despite being a bit stingy, she was willing to spend for the twins. 

It was a simple gift but for Han Meixiu it was also the representation of her best friend's feelings. 

They knew each other for a few years yet she never received this kind of expensive gift.

In her heart, she was hoping that when the time comes that they would face each other, they won't forget the things and memories they shared. It would be better for that time to not come at all.

*

After a few months of rehabilitation,  Han Meili was scheduled to visit the places she wanted to before finally accepting her new identity.

Right now, both Doctor Su and Han Meili were entering the old Han residence. 

Based on its state, it was clearly an abandoned house. Although nothing seemed to be missing, the layer of dust and the gloominess of the environment were more than enough to make one shiver. 

Han Meili didn't really probe further on how they got the permission to visit the place nor who provided their transportation and other necessities for this short trip. 

After Doctor Su told her that she shouldn't worry, she indeed rest her worries and went on with her plan.

Looking at the room she used to use, she couldn't help but be emotional. 

In this room she formed her dreams and aspirations. 

The naive girl who thought that as long as she has the support of her mother and grandfather,  she could get anything she wanted.

Han Meili slowly gathered some of her personal things and carried them outside. Doctor Su who was still admiring the abandoned mansion glanced at her and followed her. 

After placing the box outside the mansion, Han Meili went back inside. 

Doctor Su looked around. The place must have been a garden in the past. 

In a span of ten minutes, the woman came back holding a can and lighter. Her face had few soot but the woman wasn't bothered by it. 

Han Meili then started to fill in the can and lighted a fire after putting some dried leaves and stems she quickly gathered from the area.

"You're not going to keep them?" Doctor Su asked when the fire started to consume the things inside the can.

"I'm letting go of everything. There's no point in keeping something that would only hold me back to move on." Han Meili answered as she stared at the burning flame.

It took almost an hour before Han Meili was satisfied that everything she placed inside the can was burned completely. 

"Let's go." She softly said and quickly went towards the gate. 

After the mansion, they went to the hospital where the Old Han was being confined. But they didn't enter the room. 

Han Meili only looked at the old man lying on the bed before she turned around and left. 

The last place she visited this day was her mother's tomb. Compared to her grandfather, her mother had a hard time accepting what happened to the Han Family. Eventually her health got worse and she died almost a year after she was imprisoned. 

If there would be someone Han Meili should seek for forgiveness, that would be her mother. 

She wanted to say a lot of things. She wanted to voice out her grievances. She wanted to ask to be pampered. She wanted to be hugged. She wanted to hear her mother's voice one last time and tell her, ``Don't worry. Mother is here..'

But there was no one anymore. Her mother dies when she was also fighting for her life. 

She wanted to cry but her tears were already dried up. 

She must have cried too much already. 

She could only murmur a soft and painful 'sorry' in front of her grave. 

Her heart was crying but there was no single tear came out. 

The sun already set on the west part but Han Meili was still standing on front of her mother's grave. 

"Meili...it will get dark soon..."

"Just one more minute." Han Meili gently said. Since this might be the last time she could visit her mother, she wanted to treasure the quiet and serene time with her.

Doctor Su nodded. Although she doubted that a minute would be enough, she still left the woman and moved a little farther. 

She was right, the one minute lasted for more than an hour. But after seeing Han Meili who looked like she would collapse any moment, she didn't utter a single complaint. 

When they got on the car, her poor stomach started to complain loudly. 

"Sorry." Han Meili said while her head was lowered. 

"It's okay. We can just take out if you don't want to eat outside."

Han Meili nodded. 

She really wasn't in the mood to eat. But it's not the case for Doctor Su who silently accompany her without any complaints. 

After arriving at the hotel, Han Meili quickly took a bath. Her mind and heart were still in chaos. There was still little part of her unable to let go but..she knew she had to.

Maybe it was because of the relaxing warm bath or the calming scent of the bubbles, her mind started to clear.

As she leaned back and resting her head on the edge of the bathtub, her vision travelled back to the past. 

It was like a movie that only she could watch. By the time she came back to her senses, the water already lost its warmness. 

That night, she didn't sleep. She was writing and by the time she finished, she saw a few drops of tears on the paper. 

'Ah, I managed to cry.' 

When Doctor Su knocked on her door, she was already prepared. 

The last destination was the burned mansion of Chen Dewei. 

The car stopped at a certain distance from the area. Although Doctor Su was puzzled why they didn't go nearer, she kept her mouth shut. 

"Wait for me here." Han Meili said and got out of the car.

This time, Doctor came prepared. She brought snacks inside her bag just in case Han Meili forgot again that someone was accompanying her. 

The place where they stopped wasn't even near the gate of the mansion. From the gate there's still a good distance to the main mansion. Calculating the total time of going to the mansion and coming back to where the car was based from a distance, it would probably take an hour. 

Doctor Su decided to take a nap. 

The doctor was indeed right, Han Meili again forgot her companion. 

When the doctor saw Han Meili coming back from a distance, she was munching a pack of chocolate chip cookies. It was actually the second one. 

The past days were her cheat days. After emptying the pack quickly, she drank the entire bottle of water before going out of the car to greet the woman. 

"Is there any place you want to visit? Let's have lunch first before we go."

"There's no more." Han Meili simply said. Compared to her complexion the previous day after visiting her mother's grave, she looked calmer. 

The two then went back to their hotel to pack. They took the late evening flight back to K Country. 

On the way to Doctor Su's place, Han Meili handed her a letter.

"What's this?" The doctor asked. 

"If one day my new self would pester you about my past, give it to her." Han Meili answered and smiled gently. 

Doctor Su nodded before responding, "I'll be sure to keep this properly."