chapter 20: the last piece

Blake's P.O.V I spoke in a breathy way trying to catch my breath "where am I?",

the voice inside me spoke "can't you remember?",

"can't you remember the feeling of your first kill and how exciting it was?".

I found myself biting my lip with the excitement I found the tingling sensation in my body. 2001 I was 15 years old I just got home from a tiring day at old oak high-school,

my house was quiet empty? Which normally it isn't the TV would be on my mum would have been watching her favourite soaps and she'll always be on the kitchen which is near the front door so I would always smell the delicious dinner she would be making for us she loves to spend her time in the kitchen making anything and everything, she's always had the radio in the back ground she would be dancing happily,

my mum has always been a happy enthusiastic person who had a smile on her face everyday,

she's is always there to great me and ask how my day has gone as always,

I would reply with awful and she would give me a big loving hug and carry on making dinner,

my dad was in prison at this point wasn't the first time, he wasn't the best of role model but I loved him alot,

it was difficult for me at this time because I missed him I just wished he would behave,

I never knew what he would be in prison for, but it was many of different things he'd only be in for a couple of months but still it seemed to drag on,

my dad always kept to himself it's a rare occasion if we ever ate dinner together it'll always be me and mum but I got use to it,

I don't think my mum liked it,

I would always hear her cry every night when I went for a glass of water or to use the toilet,

it was difficult to hear her cry I've always seen her happy and not a negative bone on her body nothing really upset her but something must have to make her that upset, my dad would always spend time with me like play football,

help me with homework and take me for walks if I was ever upset or angry he always told me "Blake if you ever need time to yourself and need to think nothing like a good walk wouldn't help" he would smile and ruffle my hair I didn't like it but I let him,

like before I would miss him when he went to prison I just never understand why won't he be good for me so we could spend everyday together.

Today was different I couldn't find my mum downstairs no TV no radio no amazing smell that would hit you the minute you walked through the door, I placed my backpack down walked into the livingroom she wasn't there I walked slowly up stairs I faintly heard my mum talking was she on the phone?,

as I slowly opened her bedroom door she...was cheating on my dad with a random guy "Blake!...this isn't what you think" she yelled out as she scrambled to grab her dressing gown from the door and run to get me leaving the random guy in her bed I walked away from her and decided to go for a walk I slammed the door before she could get to me and I ran, I ran as far as I possibly could I ended up in the middle of a forest I knew my way round my dad once took me here, thought ran round my mind did dad know is that why I don't see them together and is that why he's in prison because he can't stand to look at her, then I heard the whispers for the first time it was the loudest whispers I've ever heard,

BANG! a gun shot sounded in my mind I covered my ears I didn't know if it came behind me or at the side of me, I didn't realise at the time it was in my head,

I ran a bit further to be safe if there was someone with a gun "Blake!" A loud and sinister voice called my name,

I turned all in a circle to find the person who called my name I bellowed "who's there!?" "BLAKE! I'm in your head...I am you" "what this doesn't make sense who are you?" "I'm telling the truth really...I don't think that was a good thing your mum did" "h..how do you know that?" "I told you I am you...I think she should pay for what she did...don't you?" "Like what?" "Why don't you head back home grab the biggest kitchen knife and slit her throat" the voice got deeper and deeper "w..what...no! I'm not going to kill her" "well she did cheat on your poor dad...why do you think he's in prison...he does it so he can keep you safe make you think we're all a loving family...he did it for you...and what did she do?",

I felt hatred,

depressed and nothing!, nothing for her what she did,

I didn't feel like myself but I liked it with a smirk on my face I headed home. I did what the voice told me I grabbed the biggest kitchen knife and walked upstairs slowly trying not to stand on the sqeeking stairs,

I stood in front of her door with the knife behind the wall so she couldn't see it and pushed the door a little she was sat on the edge biting her nails in worry but I don't care she deserves it "Blake!" She spoke with worry in her voice as she ran over to me "I'm so sorry Blake...lets go talk about it yeah?" "NO!...IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" I screamed in her face I grasped the knife with all my mite and slit her throat her warm milky blood splattered on my face I didn't flinch yet I smiled I enjoyed every second of it as she collapsed to her knees,

she shocked expression was still on her face as all her warm blood splashed out of her oozing neck then she collapsed to the floor in her own pool of blood.

Back to present day.

"See Blake you do enjoy the feeling...just let it go!" As the voice spoke I felt nothing, nothing at all the only thing I wanted to do was kill! All the felling I felt as I rubbed my croch with excitement,

all my memories came back killing Rose's parents, Tj, Anika those random girls until once again in the distance i could hear the police sirens I knew where to go and so I ran.

I bolted through my apartment bellowing for Rose "ROSE!" I kept on shouting as I checked through each room and the voice in my head began to yell "WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!" "Looking for Rose what do you think I'm doing!" "Are you stupid they'll come looking for you straight away if your here" "I still need Rose...I...i love her okay",

the voice in my head started to laugh ever so sinister "really Blake can't you remember her death" "what your lying...you always lie to get what you want" "you killer her" "NO SHUT UP!" "You had a flash back a bit ago" "I thought I was going crazy with all this stuff...why did I kill her...NO! She was here" "Blake...you are crazy you pretend so you didn't fell guilty they were never here",

i slid down my wall in defeat I grasped my head "I can't believe it" "it'll come back to you" "I don't want to remember".

2004 I was 18 years old I walked into the apartment and slammed the door shut behind me and leaded back and closed my eyes with exhaustement "hi Blake" it was Anika she was always sat at her desk doing what ever Anika does "hi Anika", I walked into her room and smiled at her "how was work?" She asked me "what do you think?" I said in a sarcastic tone "you should really chill out for once your always working and stressing yourself out" she turned to look at me "well someone has to work" I spoke as I raised my eyebrow up at her.

At the time I used to work at a coffee shop round the corner from the apartment. "Any cute girls there?" She smiled at me "no Anika I told you...I don't want a girlfriend!" I raised my voice a little I was already annoyed because she was right not about the girlfriend thing but about me not having any rest, my boss already asked me to do extra work this week I never have a break,

"look you can't spend your whole life single" "Anika leave it please if someone comes along...then yeah" "what happened to those other girls you went out with?" She questioned "Anika I told you not to mention them...okay...and anyway they were just one night stands no meaning" "oh that's why I never met them and...gross" "Anika your not my mother okay and why so invested in my love life" "because I love you like my little bro and my little bro needs a girlfriend a-", before she could finish I cut her off "I DON'T NEED A GIRL..." I sighed "I'm perfect fine without one" "if you say so" she rolled her eyes. Anika use to piss me off so much I just wished one time she's leave the whole girlfriend thing at bay she would always ask me "is there any cute girls" or "get yourself out there" I'd hate it. Anika spoke before I left her room,

i bobbed my head back into her room "yeah....I kinda....singed you up for a dating app" she could tell I was pissed off but at the time pissed off wasn't even remotely close to what I was feeling "you've got alot of matches" she spoke trying her hardest to make things better, I just closed my eyes and clenched my fists taking small deep breaths in and out but then BANG! Once again I wasn't myself I gave out a smirk to Anika "your right" she just smiled at me,

I walked out her room into the bathroom and opened the draw I noticed some nail clippers which attached to it was a nail cleaning tool I thought to myself this would do with the pointed part clenched in my hand I walked into Anika's room, she turned to look at me "Blake you okay?...you look sick" I slowly walked towards her she was petrified and I liked it which caused me to grin even more "Blake w....wwwhats in your hand?" "I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE IT ALONE!" after I spoke I stabbed the nail clippers into the side of her throat,

she did try to fight but it was too late she gasped at her throat,

I really do enjoy the shocked look in there faces its like they didn't expect it, once again Anika was sat in her own pool of blood as it gushed more and more out then she took her last breath as I watched with plasure.

It's the same year but months before I killed Anika I was walking home minding my own business as always coming back from work still annoyed as ever in the distance behind me I could hear two girls talking and giggling I ignored them as it's normal for girls like that I would say younger but they looked round about my age,

until "hey!...cutie", were they talking to me? I slightly looked over my shoulder trying not to make it obvious just incase there not talking to me or to someone on the phone but as I did one of the girls made eye contact with me and said "yeah you" so I stopped dead in my track before turning around I let out a huge sigh,

I normally get this from girls and sometimes guys which as the person I am I don't like new people i hate talking unless I know them especially when they try flirting with me but I don't mind it's the fact someone of them don't stop and it just makes me uncomfortable and when I see myself in the mirror I don't get what people see I'm not this handsome muscly guy but I guess I'm just people's type.

I turned around and spoke with annoyance in my tone "yes..." "ever had a threesome?" The red haired girl spoke. Both of them were really skinny one with bright red hair which was in a Bob cut and green eyes she looked like she had trouble in her eyes she didn't look the most approachable the other dark hair I couldn't really tell if it was black or dark brown as it was in the night sky, her hair was in plats so I'm guessing she had medium length hair but I could tell she had brown eyes as the same as the other girl she again looked like trouble. I raised one eyebrow at them "no can't say that I have...and would never" "aw...what a shame you could have had both of us" the dark haired girl said "your both very beautiful but I'm not into any of that" "what you like gay or something" the same girl said "no...like I said I'm tired I want to go home" "we can give you our number so another time" the red haired girl spoke as she did she walked over to me and placed both of her hands on both of my shoulders "can you not do that please like I said I'm not interested so no not now not ever" as I spoke i slightly shoved her hands away "aw your no fun" the dark haired had said as she also walked towards me,

I turned my back tying to fight the whispers the voices then BANG!... I turned back to them and raised an eyebrow at them and let out a smirk as I said "you know what okay... I know a place".

I took the girls to a special field of mine "where are we?" One girl asked "somewhere secret" I let out a smirk "I'm not doing it on a wet field" the other girl said "you'll end up wet anyway...but no in there" I chuckled to myself as I pointed to a hatch I opened it with force as it made an imprint on the grass "come on then girls" I spoke as I headed down,

walking down the hallway one of the girls said in a anxious tone "I...I.. don't know" "what you wanted to" I spoke as I opened the door I held the door opened to let them in and locking it behind them "w...why lock it?" The red haired questioned "we don't want anyone walking in do we?" "What is this place and how did you find it?" The dark haired girl asked "mhh...it was my safe spot as a child...my father made it for me" as I spoke I walked closer and closer to the girls the both chluched each other linking there arms together and slowly backing away from me,

I picked up a small little horse statue on my desk as I did I let out a smirk and stared at them both "w...what are you doing?" The dark haired asked me "well...you wanted fun....AND THIS IS MY FUN!" As I bellowed at them I smashed the dark haired girl over the side of her head her warm bright blood sprayed over my face the other girl let out the loudest sqreech it made my eyes twitch "SHUT UP!" I screamed at her before doing the same to her,

I stood over there bodies smiling to myself still grasping the statue tightly both of them had a satisfying indent in there head but I noticed the red haired girl was still alive as she was trying to crawl to the door I rolled my eyes and I slowly walked up to her knowing I'll easily catch up,

I stood over her she spoke ever so breathy and quiet but I just made out what she was saying "p..p..please" "aw pleading for your life now...you should really think before harassing a stranger because you don't know what there capable of" I said as I began to hit her over and over again each hit her blood splashed over my face and on my dark blue work top,

a droplet of blood entered my mouth which caused me to stop and drop the statue as I watched it roll a little and as I did I licked my lips of the taste of blood and how delicious it was I felt it slowly run down my throat and I moaned in delight, I smiled and squinted my eyes of excitement and of peace as I rubbed my hands on my top to get rid of the blood I felt like someone who does drugs finally got their fix of drugs I never felt so good.

Months after the incidents I set out a flyer advertising for a new roommate and as it was a nice and decent apartment I got a couple of people straight away asking to come see it in person but one person stood out to me one guy named Tj,

I've never had a guy roommate before but I've only had one which was Anika,

Tj got alot of money but it never said what he does but it would be perfect as I know he wouldn't be late paying the bills so I asked him if he could come and visit.

A couple days after he finally came we talked we had a couple of laughs he was great we hit it off straight away I knew we would be thr best of friends and surly enough we were he had been living with me for a couple of weeks alot of the time he kept to himself but when he didn't he was the best friend I have never had,

I was coming up to paying the monthly bills as the apartment was £988 I was say working out how much we both should pay so it was fair I was sat at the desk in my room working out loud "if we both pay 410 pound each a month that should work out" as I finished Tj walked into my room "sorry for correcting you but dude your 30 pound each out on your calculations" "NO...i'm not I just worked it out Tj it addeds upto 988 pound...i'm not wrong" I mumbled under my breath "Blake I Want this to be fair and it isn't your wrong I'm sorry",

Tj was always the smartest he was really Good at maths and working out things really fast but I didn't like being wrong nor being corrected especially when I know I'm right and I wasn't having it just one time can I be right and him be wrong, "please Tj leave me to work this out" "I don't mind leaving you alone but I want you to get this right" I stood up anger and jealously got the best of me I stood up staring at him "you always have to be perfect at everything your so smart aren't you" I cockly spoke "Blake I'm not gloting I promise I hate to be known as the smartest person...which I'm not" "forget it Tj your never wrong are you" I stood with my back facing him trying to calm down my anger is like a snowball it starts at the top of the hill and when it rolls down it gets bigger and bigger until BANG! I faced Tj once again "you okay dude?" Tj asked eith concern "yeah I'm just peachy" I smiled with delight as I walked into the kitchen he followed me "Blake you don't look so good you don't look yourself..." as I opened the pantry I just smiled at him as I slowly grabbed the meat cleaver and swatted it in the air "what you doing Blake?" As Tj put his hands up and slowly backed away, I let out a sinister smirk before I bellowed at him "let's see how smart you are WITHOUT YOUR FUCKING HEAD!!" As I swung at his neck as an open wound cracked open and dark blood came gushing out,

Tj fell and as he did I hoverd above him taking the meat cleaver and wacking him 5 times more and more blood came oozing out and I loved the feeling of the warmth blood on my face as I hit harder and harder until his head finally came off and rolled towards the front door, I walked towards it throwing the meat cleaver to the floor and picking up his head by his hair the petrified expression was still on his face which made me chuckle "you don't look so good" I cockly teasing what Tj had said to me as I spoke to Tj's dismembered head, then I realised "oh shit...you were right about the money situation".

Back to present day "I remember everything now...but why am i so angry and why do I get so annoyed so easily?" I spoke as I slid down my wall in confusion in depression all the emotions hit me like a ton of bricks I don't know what to do anymore,

"Blake this is you" the voice spoke "no...this is you" I spoke while trying to contain my tears as I sniffed,

"I killed my girlfriend, my best friends, my parents in law, the random girls and my own mother I can't and I would never understand,

"you will...can't you remember how much you got excited when you finally realised who you were and who you are" it spoke,

"it's just I don't understand anything this isn't who I am" "NO! You will I promise",

I let out a big sigh and pushed myself up from the floor using my hands on the wall "you need to get rid of the evidence" "what evidence?" I questioned "we need to go back to where it all started",

I knew exactly what it ment and it was the field.

We finally made it to the field and not detected by the police but still it the distance I could hear the police cars,

sniffer dogs and helicopters, one thing I can't understand is why I killed my own girlfriend and her parents "oh you will remember Blake and you will enjoy it" the voice spoke,

to be honest I don't know who I am anymore I lost everyone because of me maybe I should give up just maybe this is who I am it always has been since I was 15 years old,

I sighed and opened the hatch before letting it drop I realised the dint in the grass which was from that day when I killed those two girls which in that moment of time I didn't feel anything and it was a worry to me as it's finally happening I'm not feeling anything any sympathy for anyone I have hurt and i want more blood on my hands it worries me it's like taking a drug once you have it you want more and more until you lose it and I lost it a long time ago and this is the day I don't care about anyone anything but myself,

I slammed the hatch down and headed down into the hall way everything I had felt when down the drain and I smirked as I felt good and calm there wasn't a care in the world anymore and I felt like myself I haven't felt like that in a long time,

I reached the door and I stood there for a while thinking about my old memories and the ones in the future if I don't get caught of course until i remembered something.

At this time in memory I was about 7 years old it was a Saturday i had no school which I was happy about but I was bored until I realised my dad gets out of prison today and excitedly I ran to my mum who was lounging in the back garden it was summer of course and it was about 30 degrees sunbathing she was laid on her sunbed with her pink swimming costume on her favourite sunglasses reading her weekly magazine,

I sprinted towards her yelling "mum!...mum!" Making her jump as I reached her sunbed she dropped her magazine and lifted her sunglasses on top of her head "yes...Blake what's up?" She questioned me "when is dad getting released?" I had asked her she sat up from her bed as she signed "he's been released this morning I think he's down on that old field" she smiled as she laid back down to continue reading her magazine.

I bolted as fast as my legs could take me I was thankful the field was close to my house or I probably would have collapsed due to this heat I stopped a bit to catch my breath as in the distance I could see my dad and I realised he was digging a hole of some sort I raised my eyebrow in confusion and took a big deep breath and ran towards him I bellowed for him "dad!" He heard me and looked up and cuped his mouth to echo his voice and I could just quite make out what he was saying "hey kido!",

and finally I reached him and dove on him giving him the biggest hug I could and he did the same back jokingly he said "kido have you gotten stronger your going to hug me to death" I chucked a little as I let go of him "how've you been dad?" I questioned him he stopped digging his hole and looked up at me "I'm fine...it's prison those it's not a holiday" he smiled sheepishly at me I nodded understanding how hard prison is and how scary it is, I looked down at the hole he was digging "what's this?" I asked him he continued digging while he spoke "well kido....it's for you" i felt more and more confused as I did before "for me?" "Yeah..." he chuckled "well it's not finished obviously but once it's done it'll be your little safe spot" " I still don't understand dad?" "Well give me a couple of more days then you will understand...it's going to be a little hatch for you with a door and everything so you can come down here and do what you need to do" he smiled at me "what do you mean by safe spot dad?" He stopped and let out a big sigh as he knelt down and grasped my shoulders "look kido...i'm not a good man I've done things I regret and I don't want you to end up like me and if you are anything like me then you'll definitely need a spot just for you" he smiled at me "Blake make me a promise" I smiled and nodded at him "please don't end up like your dad you don't need to live your life with regrets and I have many and most importantly not to end up in prison...so please Blake promise me" I just nodded he frowned a little and spoke in a teasing way "Blake SAY IT!" I laughed a little before saying "I promise dad".

"Everything is coming back to me" I spoke as I grabbed a box of matches and a carton of petrol,

"I told you it would and now how do you feel Blake?" "I feel good like nothing, nothing on my mind I couldn't give two flying fucks about anything or anyone",

"and how do you feel about all the killings you have done every single person you killed?" I smirked ever so sinister but it was me doing the smirk not my alter self "I take that you don't care now?" "That's right...they all deserved it" i spoke as I stood hovering the hutch I saw the glistening petrol in the hallway as I poured some more around the door to the entrance as I took one flick of the match on the box I stared at the fire on the match ready ready burn all the memories along with it as I threw the match it all happened in slow motion,

as I saw a image of Rose in my mind i shook my head trying to get rid of her from my mind as the hutch lit up into Flames, I would be obvious to the police but at least there's no evidence anymore down into the hatch as I watched the flames grow larger and bigger I could hear the crackling of the fire burn more and more,

then I looked closely down into the hatch I swore I could see Rose she...spoke to me "Blake...help" her voice was gasping in pain I blinked a couple times as I thought this was my imagination but surely it was in that period of time I remembered a memory it was the first time I met Rose.

It was 2005 I was 19 still working at the coffee bar it wasn't as busy as it normally is,

so I could take it slow which I didn't mind I know some people love to work and test themselves and push it to the limit but I worked so hard this past couple of days it was draining and I wanted a break but I live alone at the minute so I needed the extra money,

we had one of those bells on the front door so we knew someone was coming in if we were in the back,

I looked up as I saw this girl...she was the most beautiful girl I have ever seen,

she was different I could tell something about her was just so perfect that makes her stand out was it the bright green eyes the long blonde hair the perfectly shaped body,

who knows all I know it I want to get to know her I just wanted her in my life as a friend or as something more,

"hi" she spoke in a soft yet quiet voice I smiled at her she did the same back as I spoke "hi how are you today? And what would you like?" I questioned her "mhh...difficult question as I want something strong but sweet at the same time"... she leaned over the counter "I don't like coffee very much but it's been a rough morning" she laughed a little her laugh would make anyone smile like the way I did,

when she laughed she could make anyone smile even if they were having the worst day of their lifes, even though I had just met her my life was worth living knowing she's in it and my goal was to make sure it's going to stay that way, I chuckled a little at her before speaking "mhh...that is oddly specific" she just smiled "so what can you do? She questioned me "what about an iced latte with an extra shot of vanilla?" I asked her "mhhh...bit cold for an iced" she pulled a little smirk at me I smiled "well...I can make it hot?" She smiled and nodded her head,

i turned my back as i went to go and make her the coffee i could feel her eyes watching me every move and to be honest I kind of liked it I thought to myself maybe asking for her number but what if she declineds it I feel like everything will be over if so,

as I finished her coffee I took a deep long breath before building up the courage to ask her,

"here's your very strong but very sweet coffee...like you" I spoke in a Flirty way, she looked at me in a weird way i thought oh god she didn't like it,

but to come to it, it was kind of cringy and cheesy,

i looked down as there was an awkward pause you could hear a pin drop it went dead silent probably the people out said could hear and start laughing at how bad it was until...,

she smiled,

did she like it? Did she smile to calm the awkwardness, "the worst pickup line I have ever heard" she started to laugh hysterically,

I still didn't know if she liked it or not I didn't know whether to laugh with her or just smile,

a tiny bit of me felt angry at the thought she didn't like it, i had a feeling she wasn't like any other girl but I guess I got my hopes up,

I bet she's thinking right now that I don't stand a chance with her until,

"even though that was very cheesy I liked it...I wouldn't any other time especially by any other boy but you...your different and I want to get to know you" she smiled and I sighed with relief and smiled back at her "here...my number" she had written down on a note pad she had taken out her bag and a pen and handed me her number I took it for her and had a look at it before smiling at her "you better text me" she smiled while pointing at me jokingly "I sure will" I said as I smiled at wave at her,

she ran back in saying "I'm so sorry my mind is everywhere how much for the coffee?" "On the house" she gave me a 'are you sure look' I just nodded and she smiled once again before leaving, that's when it all started.

I frowned a little at the thought as I realised I've lost Rose the only person I would ever be with and she loved me back but now it was too late I don't care I've lost all my emotions every single feeling it's all gone now,

I continued to watch the flame burn brighter and bigger it was satisfying I've never realised how entertaining it is to watch something burn,

I've never had the obsession as a kid of burning things and I know alot of kids do but now I see why,

I could hear the police cars in the distance and I completely forgot they were after me as I'm fascinated in the fire until I was blinded by a much brighter light it wasn't a mixture of orange or red or yellow it was like a huge flashlight then I realised it was in the sky and I spoke "shit",

until I heard "MR BLAKE MADINE...PUT ANY WEPONS DOWN AND YOU WILL NOT BE HARMED AND PUT YOUR HANDS UP!" I looked up into the sky it was the police helicopter a police man was shouting through a mega phone as I stared and placed my hands up I squinted my eyes as I got blinded even more staring directly at it,

the police cars stopped at the road near the field I saw at least ten different police officers bolting towards me holding guns that was point at me then I saw Sally as I did I pointed at her "she's the real killer it isn't me I have proof" "don't play dumb Mr Madine" as she handcuffed me she turned me so my back was facing her she started to search me from my arms to my legs "don't be shy now" I spoke sarcastically "I tell you,

you have the wrong person" "oh yeah Mr Madine, Zarah described her attacker that description was identical to you...your coming with us" she spoke as she linked my right arm in her left hand as she guided me towards the police cars, it was an uneasy feeling as behind me I could feel 10 maybe more guns pointed at me "look guys...can you stop pointing the guns at me" "what ever you say now will be justified in court" "I don't need court because I'm innocent I tell you you'll realise that" "mhh...we will see Mr Madine" she spoke as she tugged me ever more towards the car she placed me in front of the back car door and she opened it and placed her hand on my head to push it down So I don't bang my head,

as she got into the front before starting the car she grabbed her talky and pressed the button "detective Sally code 904 and we've finally got him",

at the back of the police car there was a separation between me and Sally obviously to keep the officer driving "how long you been pretending Sally?" I questioned her "what are you talking about" she replied "I know the truth Sally don't lie now were all alone you can tell me...just give up",

I could tell she was getting annoyed as she let out a big sigh and I could see her roll her eyes in the mirror on the car,

I can't believe they have the wrong person when it's their own boss and my father which I killed it was self-defence it's literally right in front of them,

"Blake I think I should be the one saying that" "what!?" I raised my voice a little "I should be saying stop lying it's too late for you,

when your there your able to call a family member to come into the station" "what family member...I don't have any left" "what about your father?" She asked I gleamed at her in the car mirror "my father...oh of course" I rolled my eyes mid sentence "you would definitely want him to come to the station" "yes Blake me and your dad are together...but you should know you can't help falling in love",

I knew what she ment as once again another picture of Rose was in my mind as I looked down on the car floor until I realised something "wait!?" "Yes...Blake?" I looked at her blankly and confused "my father is dead" "what!?" "Yeah i killed him" before I could finish Sally cut me off "Blake...you just admitted to killing someone...bear in mind your father is still alive" "NO!...before I could finish as you rudely interrupted!" I yelled at her "it was self-defence you and my father are the real killers I found letters between you and my father saying you wanted to kill my mother so you and him could be together" I spoke with a little annoyance as I sat forward trying to get close to her "Blake slow down you have it all wrong...I can't understand a word your saying",

she took a deep breath before speaking "you and your father fell in love after your mother was sadly killed...which we never found the killer",

I muttered under my breath "it was me" "what was that" she asked me luckily she didn't hear me "nothing" I spoke back as I slumped back into my car seat "as I was saying yes we wrote to each other but that was because at the time I was embarrassed to be dating someone who was in prison and me being a police officer didn't really work...but I promise you Blake we would never do that especially not at the time just a young boy,

I know your father use to be a bad man but he would never hurt a fly...this is really difficult for me Blake your my boyfriends son I don't want to but it's my job my duty to keep this town safe" "so your telling me my father is alive?" "Yes I saw him three days ago" I sighed and thought to myself I killed him didn't I?.

As we got to the police station Sally dragged me into a room she placed me on a chair i was still hand cuffed in front of me was a desk and two chairs and in the door walked...my father "what!...no your dead!" "Blake....what have you done!" I paused as I were going to speak but he...looked so disappointed in me which my dad has never been disappointed in me angry and upset but disappointed felt more harsh,

"Blake...i'm not dead I'm stood here",

my mind was frazzled my body felt weird I can't believe it nor understand anything what is real? What's all in my head? I can't take it anymore it's all confusing as I was trying to compose myself Sally walked in,

"this doesn't make sense...you two were the killers...you think I did it?" I questioned them they both looked at each other then at me before sitting down at the chairs in front of me,

Sally closed her eyes then looked me dead in the eyes before speaking "I'm just going to ask you a couple of questions...Blake" before I could say anything my dad leaned over and whispered something in Sally's ear I couldn't quite make out what he was saying, she looked at me and nodded "what!?...you know it's rude to whisper especially when I know its about me!" I got really angry I was trying to breath and calm,

"guys it's really pissing me off now!" I bellowed at them which made them both jump "Blake...I've never seen you like this before" my dad was shocked he groned trying to think on what to say he was speckles "DAD!...like your any better" "Blake...I know I haven't been a good man but don't speak to me like this I understand your condition..." before he could finish I cut him off "what condition?" I questioned them, they didn't say anything they just looked at each other "please tell me I have the right to know" Sally looked at my dad and she nodded,

my dad cleared him throat before speaking in his more calmest and softest voice which was difficult for him as him being a deep voiced man but I knew what he was going to say was going to either hurt me or hit me "Blake this may be difficult to believe...but I promise you this is the truth...I wouldn't lie about anything like this are you going to promise me that you will be open minded...?" "I made a promise years ago to you that I would never end up in prison...but look at me now" I looked deep in his soul I could tell he was hurting, he closed his eyes in pain not physical not mental but his heart was breaking "Blake...I know what was said...but it isn't your fault and if I can find the documents then you won't be going to prison you just need to promise,

listen and awnser" "it depends dad...what is it first then I will promise" my dad took a deep breath in I could see his shoulders move up and also his chest it was long he was scared he blamed himself for not telling me sooner or for who I was and what I have become,

"Blake...you have split personality" "w..what it's that?", the whole time Sally didn't say anything I wonder if she didn't know what to say or she didn't want to get involved just yet, "split personality is were you have multiple personalities you can't control when it happens or what happens" I cut him off "so it's like I have a darker me inside me?" "Yeah like that" my dad replied "I have experienced a voice talking to me and loss of memory I'll just wake up in a different location and sometimes....sometimes" I paused I wanted to tell them but I was scared "it's okay Blake you can tell us" I sighed "sometimes I'll wake up with blood on me...I don't know why and I'll hallucinate...in my mind you two were the killer and me Tj,

Anika and Rose were trying to help all those other people who went missing then murdered",

Sally pulled a sheepish smile before speaking "Tj and Anika's body well...what was left was identified..." "what do you mean what was left?" I asked "there bodies were burnt after being killed...but weirdly we couldn't find Rose's body" she spoke "you met Rose...Sally" she gave me a confused look "I've never seen the girl i only know what she looks like due to the missing persons posters and files...her parents were found scattered on the field" "so everything I just imagined?" "Well...yeah" my dad spoke with hesitation,

everything has just been a big lie and I can't believe it "wait!...if you can't find her body how did you manage to identify Tj and Anika...and were Rose's parents burnt too?" I asked Sally she nodded her head before speaking "there was a fire on the field we got there just in time and their bodies were burnt but we could just make out and confirm it was them"..."same as the random girls" "Why call them random girls I cut her off?" "because non of them had no coalition and no relationship to you" "but how do you know it was me?" I questioned her

"we don't...but like I said in the car officer Zarah described the person why attacked her and it sounded like you" I might just have a look a like" "maybe so but until then we need to ask questions" "That's fine...I will awnser what you need but until when what?" I asked "as we speak Zarah is currently building up the courage to come here and confirm if it was you or not" just as she finished speaking Zarah walked through the door,

Sally looked at her and stood up "I know this might be difficult for you to look at him if it was him but was this the man who attacked you?" She asked as she pointed her finger at me,

Zarah looked right into my soul I could tell she was petrified and I knew it was me just by her reaction and just as I suspected... Zarah nodded.

"Okay me and your father after leave the room" Sally spoke "why?" I questioned them "were just not allowed" my father said while shaking his head "but what about the questioned?" I asked "I'll be asking you some questions Blake" said Zarah as she sat down in front of me "B...but I don't feel comfortable talking to you" "I'm sorry Blake rules are rules" Sally spoke her tone was apologetic as she headed out the door, my father looked at me and frowned as he walked out shaking his head, "okay Mr Madine where were you the time of the fire?" She asked me as she placed her pen on the note pad waiting for me to speak "which one?" I replied "the one of the beginning of this year" "the one i found Rose again?",

she signed "Blake I know you loved her" before she could finish I cut her off "I still do" she nodded "but she's gone..." "NO!...Sally said she couldn't find her body nobody has" "yes I know but there's a period of time we're we predict that she dead" "so you mean...you just give up" "no...it's not like that Blake...if she was on the run we would have found her if she was kidnapped we would have found her...we can't just say she's alive and get her families hopes up"

"she has no family" "why's that Blake?" I paused as she said that to look at her I wasn't angry I was upset "it wasn't me you know that" "Blake I understand the situation but if you can't help us we can't help you...do you understand?" I just nodded "but what if she isn't dead all the bodies were burnt wouldn't that mean there's a chance she's still alive?" She gave me an apologetic look and shaked her head "if you please help up Blake we can help you" I took a deep breath before speaking "what do you want to know...just a warning sometimes I struggle to remember" "That's fine I'll help you remember"

...."so....where were you the time of the fire?" "In my mind I saw Rose she was in the ambulance with Sally she woke up in front of the fire and it had exploded that's what Sally was checking for" she cut me off "but Blake it doesn't tell us where you were" "I know but what I see in my mind what's happened it might tell us something" "maybe but I need you to awnser one simple question" "I don't know Zarah I wish I could tell you...when he's in control I can't remember anything or what he's doing" she looked at me as she slightly tilted her head "what is it like before he...you know?" She asked "I hear him talking to me" "what does he say?" "It depends on what's happening...like you can't do it,

your worthless,

she or they don't love you...thing's that make me angry that's his goal to get me angry...so I'm at my weakness point" "Why does he do that?" "I don't know we'll probably never know but I think so it's easier for him to take control" "what else happens?" "It always happens since I was young...I would hear a loud gun shot...when I was young I didn't understand what was happening i always thought it wasn't in my head that an actual gun shooting was happening" "if it happened when you were younger why didn't you tell anyone?" "Because I thought I would get taken from my parents...then my mum died and my dad was going back and forth to prison...I didn't have anyone...all that sadness went away when I met Rose" "Why didn't you tell Rose" "I was afraid of her leaving me...thinking I was crazy",

"you said he says thing's to get you angry and depending the situation he says different things...is that right?" I nodded "okay...the first missing person that had relations to you was your mother...at any point did you get angry...did he say anything?" She asked I nodded "when I was younger I caught my mum cheating on my dad...he said it was my mothers fault why my dad goes to prison all the time...so I blamed my mum" "what happened then?" "I heard the gun shot and...everything was blank"

she wrote down on her note pad "what about everyone else?" "Those girls they kept on calling me handsome flirting with me" she cut me off "Why is that a bad thing?" She smiled at me "I would be flattered" "not when they won't leave you alone...I tried to tell them to leave me alone but they wouldn't they just kept digging and digging" "Blake that's harassment..." I looked at her I was speechless "I didn't know...Anika always pressured me to find a girl...get a girlfriend...ever...single...day" she didn't say anything she just wrote down on her note pad "Tj was smart...really smart and it bothered me"

she cut me off "why?" "I...he was jealous...it made me even more angry" "what about Rose's parents?" "I can't remember much of that but I know I was upset with her for spending more time with her parents than me" "does the gun shot happen all the time when you get angry?...and after you can't remember anything?" "Yes" "mhh...okay after everything you've said there isn't evidence of you killing anyone...you did attack me...but we can't just blame you for everything else...not until what we find in your little hutch" "it's okay...?" "What do you mean?" "One thing I remember is him telling me to burn it" "we managed to save it...so what's in there we'll know"

"what happens if there isn't evidence there?" "I don't exactly know but we'll not have enough evidence to say it's you the only evidence we have is you attacking me".

A couple of minutes later there was a commotion in the hallway I couldn't see what it was but Zarah entered the room again holding a plastic bag inside I couldn't see until she placed it on the table and pushed it a little towards me "do you remember this Blake?" She asked I couldn't remember anything "I haven't seen this before...or if so u can't remember"..."what is it?" I asked "this is the evidence to prove you killed them...ID'S and driving licences,

jewellery and teeth of all the people we found burnt and dead...and Rose's tooth is here",

all my body went limp my mind empty my moth dropped open "I'm sorry..." "I can see you have empathy...if your dad can find the paper work you might not be going to prison...we managed to bring the court date,

you've got court next mouth if your dad can find it then you might be safe" "wait where will I be for the time being?....and if not prison then where?" "For the time being prison yes...if your dad finds the paper work before then it'll be a psych Ward".

It was the day of my trial,

my day's in prison was awful and alone nobody would talk to me knowing of what I've done and being so called 'crazy',

I was sat on my prison bed it wasn't the best room but what can I say it's prison I know what my dad was saying all this time, the bed was hard,

flimsy sheets that don't keep you warm especially on a night time and a toilet which I refuse to use it smelt even before I got here the whole room smelt which caused me to throw up a couple times, if my days in prison was only for a mouth I can't imagine what it would be like for years,

all of a sudden Zarah walked in with handcuffs I stud up the orange jumpsuit dragged on the floor it was way too baggy, Zarah put the handcuffs on me and guided me to the court room. As I entered you could hear a pin drop a couple of people gasped to the sight of me the only noise was the rattling of my handcuffs,

as I sat down there was a desk in front of me and my defendant at the side of me with lots of papers and folders behind me tons and tons of rows filled to the brim of people and in front a judge sat at his desk,

straight behind me was my father and Sally, "all rise" the judge spoke as we all did snd sat back down,

"before we clare what happens to you, you wanted to say something" the judge spoke meaning me "yes your honour..." I stood up holding a piece of paper I had written I cleared my throat before speaking "I just want to apologise to the families and friends I have sadly killed, I didn't mean to it wasn't me and it was out of my control",

as I was speaking I could hear sniffles of people behind me crying, "I can't say anything else but I'm sorry",

"thank you, you can sit" the judge spoke after my defendant stood as he handed the judge a piece of paper and she spoke "this is a document from a doctor diagnosing Mr Madine with split personality at the age of five, this young man here",

she pointed to me, "didn't get a childhood,

he didn't get to be a teenager he couldn't be free,

what he did wasn't his fault and he is still very sorry for all those lifes he has killed",

"thank you" the judge spoke "thank you your honour" said my defendant,

the judge picked up his gavel before hitting it he spoke "I pronounce you clinically insane" and banged his gavel.

The lambeth hospital was a mental institution.

A couple of weeks there wasn't bad the room was better and different we weren't allowed curtain things like if we wear a jumper were nor allowed strings just incase we try to strangle ourselves,

special sheets so we don't suffercate ourself alot of things to protect ourselves and the people around us and not to mention alot of tables to keep him at bay.

One night I could hear a slight rattling noise it isn't the quietest place but what did I expect so I tried to ignore it until I heard a familiar voice "hello...Blake" I slowly opened my eyes I couldn't see who it was as just have woken up or I didn't know how this person could get in before I knew it BANG! a actual gun shot but at me it happened so slowly but it killed me straight away.

Murder and mental health is a real thing and taken seriously before it's too late and in my life it was if things were different maybe this wouldn't have happened.

Strangers P.O.V I hoverd above Blake's lifeless body smirking "your the missing piece of the puzzle".