12. My Love, My Life.

Then they left. I was divorced again, you know, but now I couldn't be fucked up anymore. I was in the middle of a difficult European trip, I'd just lost one of my most important fleas because of Sark, and now Damon was leaving me because I wasn't vampire enough, and he smelled of passionfruit.

I felt like, now I can't do it, I can't do it, I can't do it. Jake was gone. He truly was. I felt that my heart was broken because of that, shock from divorce hadn't registered yet and oh how I wished that I could start to drink and forget but no, I had my duty.

Hope for love, for someone to be there for me, someone that I could lean on, was gone. Once again, I was alone to do my job. I had no idea what other pack members were doing or where they were. I wanted no one now. This was easier when there would not be false hope, the promise of love that then that will be yanked out of my feet. Destiny and the universe could be cruel, and for me particularly. 

Mimosa and Mirella were quiet around me, and I kept going like a robot European, keeping my emotions under control and moving on. Somewhere along the line I could be Mimi and collapse or something, but now I had to be a flea, fearless, powerful, deadly, persistent. I was a soulless killing machine. I let my darkest part of me come fully out. My vampire part, too. I drank from my enemies; I killed them and that was fun, too. My rage had evolved into something beyond just pure rage. I let pleasure come out; I embraced it fully. Let it fulfill me, there was nothing left in my soul but my darkness. 

I was now without emotions, or at least that kind that might hinder me, or weaken me. I was now the strongest and most resilient creature in the universe. Bulgaria, Bosnia, Macedonia. My reputation got quite a boost as I had unleashed something inside me. I did not know I had, my inner beast. This was a time when I learned that it was not just my rage that made me a killing machine, but I had this part of me that enjoyed taking lives, and the most cruel way possible. 

I did it slowly if possible, making my victims beg and plead before I finished them off. One can just think what kind of torture fully grown nine level Demon can take before it begs for its life. I was not telepath, I just tortured them with my poisons, with my ripping. 

Charles had been on gigs by the fleas, and he had been the one gig for his father. But not anymore. This gig, well, it had been once again one clean-up job when a few alphas had gotten in trouble with their pack members, who had thought it would be a good idea to challenge those alphas. Bran wanted these alphas to stay as they were and he had sent Charles to take care of those who would have challenged the alphas. The killing had not been too hard, and he had spent a few days with one of the alphas. 

They had drunk and Charles had good tolerance, but this alpha was not. He had told to Charles how good it had been when about six months ago, Bran had once again put up a decent alpha party and there had been a bonus. Bran had had one bitch to be bred, and she had been so fertile that it had only taken a week to get her knocked up. And then she had miscarried, but she really wanted to be pregnant as she had been in heat soon after and she had been bred again, six times in total, and she has miscarried every time. 

She had then moved away when there had been no heat, and they had a party going on. When Alpha describe how this female had smelled like strawberries and had been skinny as hell but her heat had been so smelly that they had to fuck her, Charles left. He had said nothing.

He went to see his father and told him he knew he was not gonna say anything to Adam, but he was not gonna work for his father too. Bran had denied nothing, and he had explained that it had been a punishment for Mimi to run in the heat outside without permission. Charles pointed out about 65 females who did the same and Bran never punished them. Bran was silent.

Charles was not even thinking how one could get over that kind of treatment and something had lit up inside his soul. The part that he had tried to deny, just because he was scared, and hurt in the past so badly, but now, he could not lie to himself anymore. He had strong true feelings for Mimi and he was going to do everything that he could to help her heal. 

Charles had left, and he had heard about Mimi's new reputation and he had been on base, seen Jake killed in action. He was now in Macedonia, in one fight club where Flea was up to the next. He was shocked to see almost a living skeleton walking into a cage and sheer brutality. How Mimi had killed everyone told him she was not fine.

That beast was almost unrecognizable for him and he sent a short snippet to Adam as he recorded it with his phone. How she made demon begged for its life, before killing it. She was soulless beast. Something had really snapped inside her. Charles felt so big need to go to her, embrace her, tell to her it is fine. He will take care of her.

Together with Adam, they came up with the plan. But Charles did not tell Adam about what Bran had done to Mimi. Adam's temperament could not take it and now it was not time to get into war against Bran. The plan was to help Mimi, what even she was doing, and they had heard about Damon's new marriage and either of them did not wonder why Mimi was in a state like that.

Charles understood, losing Jake, having raped by Bran and divorce. What that poor girl had done to deserve that all. He wow to be there for her. He and Adam would help her, heal her. 

The plan was to call Mimi. To see what she was doing and then go to her. To help, as she needed medical attention. Charles had given in to his brother and read himself as a doctor, too. Samuel had been adamant about that because Charles was old. He had helped Mimi and others, and being a doctor was just a bonus. So he had had time, and he had just gotten his training done. He and Adam were both general and trauma surgeons and GPs, too. Samuel had made him learn everything about Mimi too. It was not easy or fast but he had read it all.

They had gotten their plan of action ready and this would not be easy for Mimi, not at all but they would be there for her, to help her heal first and then move on, maybe deal with the loss of Jake, but somehow, something inside Adam told him that she would not face that. She would have buried that loss so deep inside her and it would not be maybe wise to try to dig it out. Adam took his phone and dialed Mimi's number. Charles was sitting next to him. Ready to listen.

I was just about to go and take down the Italian mafia when Adam's urgent call interrupted me. The sound of his voice sent a shiver down my spine, filled with a mix of anxiety and determination. I could almost smell the tension in the air as he revealed Damon had already remarried and that he knew what he was up to. My heart sank, but I couldn't let it show in my voice.

"I've been on a grueling European gig for what feels like forever," I replied, my words tinged with exhaustion. "I'm not interested anymore. Life goes on, and choices have consequences, even for others."

Adam's response was calm, but I could detect the underlying worry in his voice. He didn't want Mimi to suspect anything. "Oh, a European gig. I had no idea. Tell me where you are, and I'll come and help you."

"I'll be fine, really," I insisted, my voice devoid of emotion, as if I were a machine.

I couldn't allow myself to feel the pain of losing my dearest friend, the one who had always been there for me, the one who had professed his love without regret. But I had regrets, so many of them.

Despite my objections, Adam's tone grew firmer, taking on the commanding authority of an alpha, a pack leader. "Young lady, tell us what you're doing and where you're going. We'll come and help you. You're not fine. I can sense it through our connection. You need help and a lot of it. Losing Jake is difficult for you and a rough European gig. You are not gonna be alone, not anymore."

Reluctantly, I relented. "Fine, I'm on a mission right now. One mission went south. Sark had another little toy that I missed. Jake, Dash, Christy, and others died, but their bodies were sent to be buried. The next stop for me is Lake Lanier after this world-saving tour. In my schedule, I have Italy next up. I plan to dismantle the Italian mafia, and then take on the Russian mafia, the yakuza, and the treacherous jungles. Before that, I have to deal with fight clubs in India and China. It'll be a while before I can be free to be with you."

"Are you heading to the Sicilian house? As for your mission on the Mafia?" Adam asked.

"Yes, that's my destination. It is a good place to be, as they are mostly in Sicily," I confirmed.

"Alright, we'll be there to take care of you and get the gig done," Adam assured me. "You need some tender loving care, and we're ready to provide it. That's me and Charles. He is with me here now. "

We agreed to meet at the Sicilian house. I had no choice. Adam could be stubborn, but I had my rage on, my cruel side on so I was not going to need TLC right now. I needed to be able to work, to destroy, kill. That seemed to ease some knot inside me. I wanted them to beg for mercy, plead. 

I quickly strategized, knowing I had to disguise myself effectively. I applied pads to my cheeks to add fullness to my gaunt face and carefully chose my attire to conceal my slender figure. A touch of skillful makeup would complete the transformation. I knew Adam was perceptive, but I had my expertise in this field. I looked like I had been through a lot, but I would be still able to work, and if they would feed me, maybe I would get in better shape too, so there would not be a need to disguise myself so much. 

And as long as you don't have to strip naked, you're fine. We arrived in Sicily the next day. I drove my white and golden SUV to the big yard. That way I could go and no need to back up. I hated backing up, as I was not so good at it, so I avoided it every time I got a chance.

I got out of my car and grabbed my bags. Mirella and Mimosa were free, and they stepped out of the car too. Then I realized Adam was waiting at the door, and so was Charles. He seemed shocked at my condition. Apparently, they could see through my disguise.

Adam said to me. "Quite well done. You disguise yourself very well, but my God, how unwell you are. We are both here now to help. And we have a little surprise for you, baby. We're both doctors. We now have your medical authority to do anything for you. Magnum is in on this. You need some serious treatment and it is not optional."

He kept the door open so I could step in and Mirella and Mimosa, too. Mimosa looked at him. I saw Charles looking at me. There was something in his expression that I could not read. 

As we were walking towards medbay, Adam explained," Magnum is taking care of a lot of things already. He's already helping out with the mafia stuff and unraveling all that stuff, too. Your wolf was kind enough to just give me a schedule for the rest of the gig, so I'll start organizing that going forward. You're starting to ease up a bit now. But now, young lady. Now we're going to medbay and give you a good going over. "

We arrived at medbay. Charles had gone first. He was by the cabinets to take something out. Adam ushered me toward the patient beds.

Adam held up the syringe and said, "If you have any objections, this will help. "

This was going to be tricky because I still didn't want any touching. Not at all. I knew I might even panic and go full-on assault and I couldn't help my reaction. I had been on a long and demanding gig streak that ended me getting shed session, group rape, and multiple miscarriages, before this world-saving tour.

Damon and I had always been fighting about something. He had been with women; we had not had good times in ages. Then this fucking demanding gig where my most trusted friend had died and the rest of my group was killed, too. Just when I thought I could save them. And then Damon wanted and got the divorce because I'm not a vampire enough.

I had shut my feelings more or less down, and let out my inner beast, veritable monster and trauma of this all had gotten me into a state where physical contact was something that triggered a violent reaction in me, the reaction that I could hurt Adam properly. I could feel a slight pressure between my eyes. My fangs were making poison already. I was a mess and big time too. 

Adam looked at me for a while and said, "I see you had a pretty hellish gig in Romania. If I'm looking at it right, you lost Jake and others. Wanna talk about it? Jake was very important to you and all of us, and it will take time to get over this, and with your memory, it won't be easy. "

I shook my head and said, " Yeah, Jake is gone. Sark got him. I was not good enough. Now I warn you, I don't want any kind of touching, so just be warned, I might actually attack you. I am making poison in my fangs as we speak and it is just a reflex so no touching or I can kill you even, My poisons are not anything that you can take lightly, I know I am more or less a freaking mess but I need to function, to get this gig done. "

Adam looked at me for a moment and then walked over to one cupboard, opened it, and took something from it. I observed him, not paying any attention to the other man who was also in the room. Suddenly, I gasped as a sharp pain hit me in the middle of my chest. I looked down. The tranquilizer dart was in my heart, and I turned to look at Charles, who still had his pistol loaded. He kept his expression neutral. I felt myself start to fall to the ground, and I noticed Adam grabbing me and lifting me onto the bed. He murmured calmly to me, but I could not hear him anymore. Then everything went black.