I'm really not good with these things

That little chat with Lieutenant Colonel Kwon made me realize why Hina has been unhappy with me for the past couple of days. He's far from being an admirable man, but did have the wisdom I did not think of. 

Gees… what a sensitive little girl… so troublesome.

But at the same time, maybe the way I have been interacting with Hina wasn't what she was looking for. I naturally kept my professional appearance and distance between us, maybe except that one time I lost myself a bit when I first visited her room, but well that was only because she had so many instruments and gaming gear that stole my eyes.

I still had a bit of a hangover, but it was one of those rare days that I got to sleep in a bit longer. I was only requested by Hina to come in the afternoon to debrief on how things went with the Lieutenant Colonel. Our appointment was at 15:00 so I had plenty of time even after waking up at around 10:00. 

Man, needing an appointment to see her. That really felt odd. 

Nevertheless, I got dressed and went out early, lighting up and puffing my cigarette as soon as I got out of the building. I was still keeping Hina's 'work car' although I wasn't driving her around anymore, but I didn't feel like driving. I felt satisfied with how things went the night before but physically I was tired and thought maybe walking around for a change would make me feel better. I also intended to go shopping and it's a hell trying to find a parking spot in the shopping district, so it was probably just better to take public transport there and go to the office after I'm done.

I really didn't know what I was doing though.

I wanted to apologize to Hina. But I wasn't gonna tell her that I'm sorry because I have been too professional. That's absurd. 

At the same time, I had to, and to some extent… wanted to show her that I did appreciate her as a person, not just as a boss. 

:Sigh:

Such things shouldn't really matter in work workplace. Besides, we spent so much time together already in and out of the office, with me even staying at the Chan Mansion for some time. Maybe I can never consider her a 'friend', but I was like that with Chairman Chan as well. I respected him and admired him but he wasn't a friend, perhaps like a father or uncle at most. In any case, Hina should know that I do appreciate her as a person.

Hang on… just what about her do I even appreciate?

Then all the bratty things that Hina has done so far came to my mind, but instead of making me annoyed, these flashes of memories made me laugh out loud for a second. 

Well, a 19-year-old would never accept this, but she is a kid after all. I wasn't really good with interpersonal relationships that are not work-related or motivated, but I suppose kids get happy when they get presents. 

But when I got to the shopping street. I realized that I really didn't know what I was doing. 

Just what the hell am I even supposed to get her? There is no excuse or reason to give her a gift today. Not her birthday, not any anniversary. People don't just buy a random gift on a random day and give it to their colleagues, right? Wouldn't it be weird if I suddenly turned up with a gift? I wasn't even gonna say sorry anyway. But wait-, why am I even buying her a gift then?

I pondered why I was even doing this, but still, all I could think of smoothing this situation without getting into some deep and cringy talk with her was to buy her off with some nice gift she would like. Maybe it was a cowardly way for me to dig myself out of the recent troubles, but I had to do what I had to do.

Then I thought about what she likes. And two things came to my mind.

OK, she likes cheese and chocolate. Fair enough. It's not weird to give her those, right?

"Miss, I was passing by some cheese shop and thought you might like this"

That would just come across as nice and casual, and most importantly, it will show that I do keep her in mind not just for work reasons, and when I do see something I think she'd like and then I think of her. 

So I walked in and found some good Parmesan cheese sliced into bite-sized cubes. I do like cheese too actually. It's just that I wouldn't eat them with chocolate.

Oh, wait, chocolate! If I give her cheese AND chocolate, she will appreciate it even more! She will see that I 'accept' her taste, which in turn means that I respect her. 

So I found a good chocolatier shop that I knew was nearby. I did come here a few times before to buy some as gifts for Chairman Chan's guests. There were many top-tier chocolates that were packaged in fancy boxes, but I thought it'd be odd for me to buy them for her. It's not like she can't afford and appreciate if I got her something expensive. Then I saw a small box of chocolate that had bowl-shaped chocolates inside. I think the idea was that you could put what you like into those chocolates. Most people probably went for nuts, but knowing Hina, if I gave her this Parmesan and these chocolates, she'd find it to be a great combination and appreciate my gift even more.

When I walked out of the chocolatier's shop I was feeling good and I felt lighter both on my feet and my heart. 

Hm hm, this will sort things out I'm sure. 

But as I was walking towards the subway station to head to the office, something caught my eye when I was passing by an accessory ship. 

No, Sin. That'd be weird. Like really weird. 

Why would anyone buy accessories for their boss? Especially when it's not any special occasion at all?

So I shook my head and just walked on.

But what I saw kept on coming up in my mind.

It's nothing. She won't like it anyway. But then-, why am I keep thinking about it?

Just before I was about to go through the gate to enter the train platform area, I turned around like a possessed person, walked all the way out of the station again, and went into the shop. I bought what I saw earlier and had it gift-wrapped.

Gees. This is stupid.

I immediately regretted it because I knew I wasn't going to give them to Hina in the end. Maybe I got them because I wanted them? Yeah, they are something that I would like. Actually, hm, yeah, I can just use them myself. Consider it a treat for my hard work in putting up with Hina for the past weeks. 

Life has been hard on you, Sin. Here are some presents for you. 

Thank you, myself.

It didn't take me too long to arrive at the office and I got to the top floor, which only had Hina's office. I used my fingerprint and iris scan to go in. I checked my watch and it was 14:50.

"Good afternoon, Lui"

"Hi, there, Sin. You are a bit early"

"Well, you know I don't like being late. I have an appointment with Miss at 15:00"

"I am aware. But it was her instruction that I do not let anyone in before the appointment time"

"What?"

"I'm sorry, but she specifically said that includes you"

Jesus. 

I felt like throwing the gift bag I had in my hand.

"What's that, Sin?"

Damn. She spotted it.

"Er, it's nothing. My-, my sister. Yeah it's my sister's birthday today"

"Sin"

"Yes?"

"You don't have a sister"

Damn. Why the hell did I come up with the lamest excuse ever to the woman who knows everything about my background?

":Sigh: Fine. I can't trick you. These are for the Miss but I don't think I will give them to her anymore. Do you want some chocolates or cheese? Or both?"

"They are clearly meant for the Miss. That's very thoughtful of you, Sin. I'm sure she'd be happy to receive them"

"You… think so?"

"I can guarantee you"

:Bzzzt:

Lui got a message on her smartwatch.

"Miss Chan says you can come in now"

Hugh… I guess I'll just do this.

"Good afternoon, Miss"

Hina was still lying back on her massive bean bag and waved at me without getting up. 

How rude. Maybe I won't give these to this brat after all. 

"What's that you got in your hand, Sin?"

Shit. She saw them already. Of course, she will see them, what was I thinking? I walked in with a gift bag in my hand for no reason.

"I… was just shopping and saw some things… and thought maybe, erm, you'd like them…I think?"

"Huh? It's not my birthday"

"I am aware, Miss. I just saw them and they made me-, how do I say-, yeah, something like that"

"You are not making much sense today, Sin"

But she was now sitting properly on her bean bag with anticipation. 

Man… let's just do it and get it over with. 

"Anyways-, Miss, these are for you"

I passed the bag to Hina and she took them with both hands, and when she opened the bag her face lit up.

"Wooo~, cheese and chocolate. Thank you"

Her mood now was better than it had ever been since our little - what was that in the car that time, that wasn't even an argument… but whatever. 

"And what is this?"

FUCK. I forgot to take it out.

Hina picked out the gift-wrapped box and held it in her hand. She looked so happy and touched I couldn't tell her those were for myself.

"It's nothing. It's just like the chocolates… I saw them and-"

Hina was already carefully opening the packaging, not tearing it apart, but opening them slowly and nicely to make sure that the wrappers didn't get torn. 

She then saw that it contained a box with a black velvet surface.

"The-, these are for me?"

I did not answer and Hina proceeded to open the box, and she burst out laughing when she saw what was inside. 

I knew it. It was a grave mistake. Why did I even think these would make a good gift for her? If I'm ever gonna drop into a sinkhole, now would be a good time.

"What the heck, Sin? Who gives these as a gift to a girl?"

She was laughing all the way through, but the way she said it conveyed that she wasn't mocking me. She found it funny because it was unexpected, but she was genuinely happy.

"I'm sorry, Miss. I'm really not good with these things…"

"I love them! I'm gonna try these on now!"

She then took out the cuff links out of the box. 

Those cuff links were square-shaped with a golden frame and jet-black smooth finish surface in the middle. I have often seen her wear French Cuffs and also many of her suit jackets were jet-black, just like on our first day at work together. 

She was right though. These weren't even girls' cuff links, which are quite unusual to start with. They were for men. But I just thought they would look good. I didn't think things through very well. It must have felt really out of the blue to receive those gifts from me. 

As I was slightly lost in my thoughts for a bit in embarrassment, Hina snapped me out of it by standing right in front of me flexing the new cuff links she put them on.

"These look badass, right? They are awesome!"

"Ye…yes, Miss. They look good on you"

"Thank you, Sin"

Hina gave me a friendly, light, and polite hug like you do when the wives of high-positioned men meet at dinner parties. 

It was for a very short moment and I didn't hug her back.

But she smelt kind of nice.

Just a bit.