Hobie's Death System

"Hello, Master! We are your brand new slaves! Please treat us kindly~~!" A variety of girls that could satisfy the fetish of any man.

"Hehehehe! Oh, don't worry! You won't feel any pain just pure pleasure, hehehehe..." Hobie just enjoying his time.

Suddenly...

"Bang!"

"Ugh! The hell? You ruined my dream you asshole!" Hobie shouted at the blurry figure in front of him.

"Greetings! I am--" The mysterious figure was suddenly kicked in the shin.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow! HEY! What was that about?"

"Guess you asshole! You woke me up from my harem! Of course, I am angry!" Hobie shouted at the mysterious figure.

"Your harem doesn't matter right now! You are already dead!" The mysterious figure in front of him trying to explain the situation.

"No no no! It's Omae Wa Shindeiru! You retard, you failed to use the meme properly!" Hobie with a dissatisfied face.

"Nani? What the hell does that have to do with this?" The mysterious figure keeps on getting more and more confused. The person in front of him was named Hobie, this particular lad died because of "unforeseen circumstances."

"There we go! You actually used the meme properly! HAHAHA! Now... WHERE THE FUCK AM I?"

"You just realized this just now? Are you retarded?"

"No u!"

"For fuck's sake! What was wrong with them to give you the Death System?" The mysterious figure murmured to himself.

"Ohhh! I get it! This is the part where you give me an amazing power that is considered OP then I go do whatever the fuck I want to right? Right? Ei! Right?" Hobie keeps on persisting the idea.

"Ehh... Uhm... Well, you see... Uhm... yeah you're right, you don't have to be cocky about it! Gaahd!" The mysterious figure broke character and went to his usual self.

"FUCK! Fine, this uncomplicates things you weeb. Blah blah blah blah, etc. etc. etc. You now have this system now fuck off!" The mysterious figure was still blurry as he created a portal then threw Hobie inside.

Hobie was sent to a forest like a typical isekai concept.

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"And that's how I got here! Any questions?" Spears were still pointed on Hobie's neck. The guards were still silent.

"Well since you have no questions! Can you put these spears down now? Ha.. ha... ha..." A cold laughter could be heard from Hobie.

The guards were still not responding only being firm in holding Hobie in place by his neck. A random person showed up in the sacred grounds of the Empire how could they let him leave?

Awww SHIT! I am so FUCKED right now! These people aren't letting up what's their deal? Hobie's inner thoughts.

A bright light then surrounded Hobie and the guards. It was one of the protectors of the sacred grounds.

"What's a mere mortal like you doing in this sacred lands?" The protector asked Hobie.

"How the fuck should I know? Go ask that mysterious blurry figure I met from before!"

"Huh? You don't know? How did not know how you ended up here? No matter I can't let his majesty witness this blunder" A sword made out of fire and ice stabbed Hobie's chest.

The sword entered Hobie's chest piercing his heart. Hobie's eyes were losing light. He didn't feel much pain as it happened too fast. As his consciousness was fading a sound rang in his head.

[System now activated. User integration... completed: User: Hobie]

[Detected death of user... Initiating resurrection of User]

[Ding! The system has found 3 viable creatures for resurrection]

[1. Ant- 1 Death Coin]

[2. Retarded Ant- Free]

[3. Harem Protagonist- 2 Death Coin]

" Shiiiiiiiiit! Things got real reallllly fast! Let's see... I choose option 3 system!" Hobie was ecstatic learning that his dream would become reality.

[Invalid Choice. The user currently has "1 Death Coin"]

"You serious? YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? You gave me the fucking option to be a Harem Protagonist yet you deny that from me? What's wrong with you? My lifelong dream so close yet so far! System, tell me right now how to get another death coin!"

[User needs to die and the accumulated skills, techniques, cultivation, abilities, relationships all equate to death coins]

[System only found viable creatures for resurrection, the system doesn't not factor in the cost of death coin]

"SHIT! GOD DAMMIT! My dreams' right in front of me goddammit!" Feeling utterly helpless, if he still had a body would cry his eyes out.

[Choose the creature for resurrection]

"Fine! Let's see... either be an ant or be a retarded ant! System you really are giving me a lot of options here! From my standpoint, one could say that you really want to turn me into an ant!"

[Yes. The user must be an ant, it was decided by the higher ups]

"Really?" If he still had a face and hands, Hobie would facepalm after hearing the absurdity from the system.

[Really]

"You serious?"

[It's programmed within me]

"Whatever! I'll choose option 1"

[Initiating resurrection: Retarded Ant]

"Huh wait... what? What were the options again, system?"

[Options:]

[1. Retarded Ant]

[2. Ant]

"Why the fuck did it change?"

[It was randomly generated, it was totally not on purpose]

"Ha! See when you say it like that it feels that you really are out to get me! Ha ha ha! Its funny right? Anyways I change my choice to option 2."

[Changing options... Completed]

[Initiating resurrection: Retarded Ant]

"WAIT!"

[System paused]

"Why is it still retarded ant?"

[Cause it was randomly generated]

"Cause what?"

[Options:]

[1. Ant]

[2. Retarded Ant]

[System continued... Finalizing resurrection to Retarded Ant]

The system finished talking before Hobie could react.

[Ding! Finish! Welcome to your new life User: Hobie, Retarded Ant]