Cycle to Cycle

[Diary Chapter]

—

My name is Haise Kazumiya, just your typical high school student you can find anywhere. You see, I live alone and there's only "me" who support myself in my daily life.

My mother who was supposed to be by my side left me in the air. You're probably curious to what reason she left me... It was just some bullshit reasons.

I just woke up and saw those letters she left for me, and you know what's the content?

For "fucking" sake, it was just her love for her so called master. What the fuck?!

(...)

She probably went back therein when this so called leader sent us home.

What about me?

I'm your son, you know?

We've been together in our best and worst as mother and son. Though the life is indeed harsh we found our way to step up and reach the light we need... And yet you chose the spark?

Oh, mother, why? Just why?

Are those smiles and laughs are nothing, but an illustration?

I pinched my nose bridge. Just thinking about it, stressing me out. Haaaaaay! Let alone our debts that was left behind by my father.

Fuck shit! What kind of life is this? Really, it feels like hell!

Well as a man who follows my principle of freedom and understanding, I only have one wish for them as their son. I wish them happiness.

Specially to my mother...

I stare down with a downcast eyes, then lift my chin with close eyes, reminiscing the merry times we had have.

I guess, I'm really not that important, huh?

Hehe... Hahahaha...

I laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed, like I was watching some comedy series.

Laughed and laughed, but tears of pain and disappointment bursted out on my eyes. I really can't fake this one... Hehehe.

***

In the forest, beside the lake...

Farewell, Mother...

I threw the magazine with an image of a naked woman onto the lake. Immediately, the magazine was gabled by the water, like how this shitty attachment and emotions of mine slowly faded... But not utterly.

As I was staring at the lake, heavy raindrops began to comfort me along the place.

Washing me and covering my tears.

And that's where the shits happened to me.

The whole like an eye of a storm appeared in the sky, and a crimson meteor-like descends to the place where I was standing. With my teary eyes, I watch it to crush me.

This is probably my time, huh? I can finally rest, but I don't wanna die yet. Just observing the size and the speed of this mysterous matter, it really is impossible for me to escape its devastating waves. So what's the fucking point of running away, if death only awaits?

At least that's what I thought.

A disturbing light blocks my sight, and when I opened my eyes and regained my sight, I found myself in some mysterious space or dimension that science itself may find it difficult to explain.

In this place, there was only this threads dots of light that wanders around.

"Haise" a whispering and ghost-like voice resonates in my mind.

With my widened eyes, I wandered my gaze around and saw the aurora-like light gathered and in one place.

A glowing woman that looks like a spiritual being appeared before me.

Astonishment stir up in my heart. The woman that looks like a goddess with an unworldly glamour approached me.

I was taken aback and attempted to take a few step-backs, but couldn't do anything.

What can I do? I was floating in this mysterous space.

The mysterious being held my face and bumped her forehead against my forehead.

'What's this?'

Strange images and scriptures that I can't understand appeared in my mind.

"I exist for you, only for you."

While her forehead was still attached to mine, her glamorous eyes that can be described as the embodiment of beauty stare straight to my astonished eyes with a lovely gaze.

"I only exist for you, for you only."

The mysterious being, repeated. Slowly, she closed her eyes, her and my lips touches together.

I was really speechless and breathless at that moment. I can't even determine if what kind of situation is this.

I'm probably dead.

Is this how death usually take us?

The mysterious being was slowly dissolved and merged with me.

I can feel it. This unfamiliar and peculiar feeling.

So this is mana, huh? It warm and cold at the same time.

By merging with that mysterious being, the existence of magic was introduced to me. She probably taught me the some common sense so that I could come up.

Slowly, my consciousness faded as a disturbing light engulfed my sight.

And that's all I can remember.