Can we start over? [GL]

UNEDITED-

Nuetral POV-

The tall white haired girl paced back and forth in her small room.. an uneasy feeling swelling in her gut. "They are forcing me to go back there.." A smaller brown haired girl sat on Luilles bed, looking sympathetic..

"Can't you just tell them no like you did last year?"

"No Jen I tried that already. They said they are proud of me and they want me back.."

"But who will check under my bed and in my closet before I go to sleep?"

"You don't need me to do that anymore.. I promise nothing is coming for us. I really wish I didn't have to go but I dont have choice this time." Lucille did her best to comfort her only friend. "I've thought of everything, there is no way they will let me get out of this unless I run off somewhere to hide.."

"Then they will call the police.."

"Yeah, then I'd be sent somewhere even worse than this.."

"At least you can spend some time with your sister before she goes to college, I know you miss her.." Jennifer's words made Lucille stop pacing for a moment to look at her.

"It would be nice to see Shiloh.. I bet she has grown up so much.." Lucille breezed over the mention of her twin sister, skipping to her younger one.

"From what I can see you're definetly right.." Jen looked to the wall that was covered in drawings and paintings that she'd been sent in her first year. they were in order of when they were received so you could clearly see the evolution of Shiloh's art work.

The first year at boarding school Phoebe had sent Lu a letter every month with a drawing from Shiloh.. Lucille never read the letters, keeping them together in the drawer of her desk.. But her little sisters drawings always bring a little bit of light into her life. "-Arent you excited even a little to see Phoebe?.."

"I miss her.. but I always get hurt whenever I'm around her.. she messes up and I claim it as my own every fucking time.."

"You're over protective.. it's one of my favourite things about you.. remember that time I was drunk and Stephan nearly-"

"Jennifer that was last week.." Lucille raised an eyebrow..

"Oh yeah.. anyway if you weren't so protective I'd have really got hurt.."

"At least I don't get punished for being protective over you.." Lucille let out a long sigh.. "As much as it pains me to say it, I really hope my sister has changed.."

"You still haven't spoken to her?"..

Lucille sat down on the bed nexto her friend.. "No.. Ma still calls once a month to see how I'm doing and give me money.. but that's it.." She hadn't seen any of them since she left the house.

"Well make sure you call me and tell me how it goes.. life is going to be so different without you around.." She paused.. "I.. I'm not sure I can do it" All of a sudden the anxiety of being alone once again dawned on Jennifer..

"You can call me whenever you want.. whenever you get nervous or scared or sad.. just call me. I will always pick up the phone no matter what.."

"You will?" Her watery eyes spoke volumes.. Their friendship had blossomed over a shared traumatic experience that happened a little over a year and a half ago.. From then on they stayed by each others side.. picking the same classes and even having rooms that are next to each other in the dorm.

"I swear.. I'll even save your number as 'mum' so I can answer it during class.." Jennifer began laughing loudly collapsing backwards onto the bed..

"Really?.." She asked still lying on her back after the laughter had subsided..

"You don't believe me? I will do it right now.." Lucille laid back and pulled her phone out of her pocket, hovering it above her so that they could both see.. She found Jens number and quickly edited the contact details.. (Mum <3)

Jennifer chuckled again before asking.."Will you not get confused?.. I can't even remember what it's like to have your phone during classes.." Lucille shook her head and began scrolling through her contacts to find her mothers number.. "Woman who birthed me?"

Now it was Lucille who was laughing.. "Yeah.. mothers are supposed to protect their children.."

"You think she doesn't love you?"..

"I think they only want me back now because I have good grades, it will look good for them-".

"She says 'good grades' as though she doesn't get the best grades out of everyone in school.."

"Well that's why they want me back.. so they can show me off. Even you would be the top student of that school if you attended"

"I honestly can't tell if you're giving me a compliment or insulting me.."

"I do love you but you're not the brightest person I know.." Lucille smiled to herself but Jennifer had only gotten more confused..

"Do you love building people up just to knock them down?"

"You're assuming I thought about it..." Jennifer only smiled at Lu's response.. Lucilles blatant honesty was a refreshing change from everyone else. A few seconds later her smile faded, as she thought again about what life is going to be like without the support of her bestfriend.

"When are you leaving?.."

"Two days.."

"That's to soon!" Jennifer sat up, beggining to contemplate the future again. Jen has struggled with containing her anxiety for as long as Lu has known her. In fact she has come leaps and bounds since then. But only because she had Lu by her side for everything.

"It will be okay.." Lu sat up to face her friend.. "-But you can't keep on living in fear.. You can't let one day dictate your whole life, there are amazing experiences out there waiting.. and I promise you don't need me to hold your hand.."

"But what if I do?" Jennifer pouted and the tears that had been threatening to fall finally did.

"You don't.." Lucille pulled Jen into a tight hug..

"Would you like me to hypnotise you not to be scared?" Lucille asked jokingly as she pulled away from her friend..

"Could you?" Lu was surprised at Jens answer..

"Jennifer.. you made me promise that I wouldn't.."

"Does it count if I ask you to do it?"

"But I was only joking.." Lu shook her head..

"I'm not joking, I'm really asking you to do it.. I'm sure. If you knew how scared I am all the time-"

"I know how scared you are.." Lucille spoke as she thought about all the times she had to sneak into Jennifer's room at night to keep her company.

"If this will make your life easier I will do it.. But it will make me hungry.."

"That's fine, I have something for you in my fridge.." Jennifer shrugged simply.. Eager to go through with the procedure and kicking herself for not thinking of doing it sooner.

"I told you to stop doing that.." Lucilles posture dropped as she sighed..

"I know but how could I not? You saved my life, I ow it to you.."

"You don't, but I won't say no to such a kind gesture since it's already done.." Lucille began to grow even hungrier at the thought of it.. "Can you do something else for me?"

"Sure what is it?"..

"You accepted but you don't even know what it is yet?"

"Whatever just tell me.."

"Can you tell George I said goodbye? And I'm sorry I couldn't say it in person."

"Is big strong Lu gonna cry?"

"Shut up.. can you just do it for me please?"

"You know I will" After Jen spoke Lu grabbed a hold of her friend and held her close.. saying goodbye to the only other person that knew her secret. "Wait.. Lucille.." Jen pulled away from her friend. "-How are you going to.. 'get what you need?'.." She asked covertly.

"I'll sort something out.." Lucille shrugged, Jen doesn't need to be worrying herself about this.

Lucille performed the hypnotism on her Jennifer that night.. making her forget everything to do with their ordeal but leaving all the precious memories that came after. When they woke up the next day Lucille noticed her friend had slept well, becoming visually more alive in herself, the glowing smile on her face was new. The remaining time of freedom from Lucilles family was coming to an end.. a feeling of dread sat heavy in her chest as she pondered what her new life would be like.

"Lu why don't you ever talk about your family?.." Jen asked while scoffing her face with a chocolate chip cookie..

"There is really not much to say. They are just regular people I guess.." Lucille shrugged from the opposite side of the round table.

"See this is where you get confusing.. because you don't lie.. you find a way to weezel put of it.."

"Ha.. I do?" Lu scoffed with an eyebrow raised as she raised the cup of coffee to her lips.

"You're infuriating.."

"I know.. but you're still going to miss me"

"I really am.."

The two girls looked to each other silent for a moment.. This will be the last time they get to sit in their favourite café together for at least another year. They come here every weekend, it's a place that is sentimental to them both.

"Hey Jen why do you always stay with me on the holidays? You could be off visiting some exotic country with your parents.."

"If you've seen one you've seen them all.." Jen shrugged dunking another cookie into her mug of hot coco and shoving it into her mouth.. "-Besides.. everyone is so fucking fancy it's exhausting trying to be perfect all the time.."

"Ah.. I don't think that's exactly right.. but I do know what it's like trying to be perfect. You soon figure out that everyone is hiding an ugly side.."

"That's pretty dark but I can't disagree..hey I know you don't like Phoebe but aren't you even a little excited to see her?.."

"You know that feeling, when you're about to step out on stage infront of hundreds of people.. Your palms sweat and your stomach turns over.. That's how I feel.."

The truth is Phoebe never really had any skill in.. well anything except dance with which she was average. She never'd had a mature mindset either which led her into doing some pretty idiotic things. Hence Lucille having made a name for herself for the first time when the twins were eight.. Phoebe had decided to spontaneously throw a stone to Lucille when they were in the school playground.. Except Lucille was stood right by a window. The window shattered and Lucille took the blame straight away.. it wasn't a far stretch to believe that she was the guilty one since she was stood right by the window.

When she got home after being suspended from school a packed bag awaited her. And five lashes across her thighs.. Her dad's favourite weapon, his leather belt. With tears in her eyes she looked to her mother who just stood and watched with a wine glass in her hand.. Once it was done she walked to her bags and was ushered straight into the back of a black car by her father.

"Are you alright miss Lucille?" Alberto asked from the drivers seat as they pulled away from the large house. He took a second to glance at his small flustered passenger in the rearview mirror.

"Bert.. where are you taking me?" A little Lucille wiped her eyes..

"They didn't tell you?."

She shook her head no..

Alberto broke the news that she was to spend the next two months away from home, and school, and everything she's ever known, only to camp out in the wilderness with a bunch of preppy adults who think they have the answers on how to cure kids behavioural issues. Apparently not many kids come back for another visit but Lucille ended up coming back twice more.. before she was sent away for good.. what she had hoped would be for good anyway. But it wasn't and now she was back in the car with Alberto. "I didn't think they would be able to convince you to come back.."

"I didn't have a choice.." Lucille said simply.. gazing out the window watching all the cars passing by..

"That makes sense.. who was the hysterical young lady you were with?"..

"She's a friend." The only one.

"It seems she cares about you alot.."

"That's what friends do Alberto.. have you been around my family for so long you have forgotten what it's like?"

"Hm, maybe you're right.. but you know how important your family is to me"

"Yes, yes I know.. I've only heard it a thousand times."

"I'm sorry that I have to be a part of this.."

"It's alright.. you're loyal, I respect that.. could you put the radio on?" Otherwise known as.. 'I'm done talking'..

Alberto nodded and did as she'd asked.

BACK AT THE CARNELL HOUSEHOLD-

"Shiloh!.. WHERE IS MY JUMPER?!" Phoebe shouted as she stomped across the landing to her little sisters room.. "Shiloh?!"

"Go away! It's not yours, Lu never gave it to you so you don't own it!"

"I don't care! Give it back!" Phoebe demanded as she made her way to the door, only to see Shiloh stood far back in the room, clutching the black hoodie to her chest.. Without hesitation Phoebe walked straight in and easily snatched the jumper from the small girl who could only whine in response.

"What is going on?!" Their mother had made her way up the stairs to investigate with her wine glass in hand.. A short black dress, fully made up for no reason in particular. Other than the fact she liked to be prepared.

"Shiloh tried to take something from my room.." Phoebe scowled..

"Shiloh.. you know you aren't supposed to go into Phoebes room without permission.. what do you say?.."

"But she took it from Lucilles stuff first!"

"That reminds me.. Lucille is coming home on Monday.."

"Yayayaya!" Shiloh bounced up and down on the spot exitedly, her long dark brown hair bouncing with her..

"Really?.." Was all that came from a shocked Phoebe..

"She didn't want too, but your father insisted.. do you know what colour she'd want her room painted?"..

"No, I don't.." Phoebe shook her head slowly, still stuck in thought at what would happen when her twin sister gets home. Would she still be ignored?

"I think she would want to have some of it blue and everything else white!.. can I help decorate?" Shiloh beamed..

"Sure.. Arthur might need a womans touch.." Julia smiled, warmly patting her little daughter on the head with her free hand..

"Sweet!.." Shiloh fist pumped and ran from the room, probably off to find her big brother Arthur..

"Are you alright Pheobe?" Julia snapped Phoebe away from her thoughts.

"Huh? yeah I'm fine.. I'm just, surprised.." The girl played with her light brown hair nervously..

"Okay, well dinner will be ready soon.. Gina is making Fajitas.." She spoke in a sing song voice as she left the room..

Phoebe did the first thing she could think of.. she called a friend..

"What if she comes back even worse than before?"

"What do you mean?"

"Phoebe, it's no secret why she was sent away.. it was in the newspaper for christs sake.." Phoebe went silent.. Her chest grew heavy with guilt. "Are you still there?"

"Yeah Ellie, I'm here. She's not like that anymore, she's the top student in all her classes...and that's really all I know about her.."

"Sometimes I forget that you even have a twin sister, you never talk about her.." The voice replied casually..

"There's not much to talk about usually, but now she is coming home and I.. I just don't know what to do.."

"There is not really anything you 'can' do.. just be yourself, don't let her control your life.. Anyway my dinner is ready so I have to go.. but make sure you let me know how it goes on Monday okay?"

"Yeah, I will.. Bye Ellie."

"Bye, remember that everything happens the way it's supposed too.." Phoebe did not believe that one bit.. It was her actions that she felt had ruined her twin sisters life. And now she had to face who her sister had become after three years of living at the second strictest boarding school in the country.

Two days past and both of the sisters had grown even more anxious. Lucille spent the whole journey in the back of the black BMW with her headphones in, blasting the negative thoughts from her mind. It was hard for her to say goodbye to Jennifer, but she knows that Jen will be okay now she is free of her demons.

They decided it would be better for Jennifer to just forget the whole ordeal.. the memory that gave her nightmares. Lucille might have went a bit overboard.. adding one more thing that they hadn't discussed. If she no longer remembered the incident, there is no need for her to remember the horror that came after.

Phoebe spent the morning cleaning her room with her headphones in, also trying to concentrate on something other than her sister coming home. Shiloh had been checking everything over in Lu's new room for the third time today.. The family had moved house a few months after Lucille had been banished. A room that had once been a large guest room in their huge house was now set up with a fresh coat of paint, two of the walls were a light turquoise and two were white.. grey carpet, all white furniture, a standing mirror and a white king-size four-posted bed with grey covers, a few pillows to many at the head and a thick purple fluffy blanket laid across the foot of it. A few dark grey shelves on the walls laid bare, ready for Lu to put whatever she wants up. She even had a large flat screen TV on the wall..

Phoebe stood in the doorway of Lucilles room watching Shiloh dance around and spray different kinds of airfresheners.. She pulled out her headphone.. "What are you doing?"

"It still kinda smells like paint in here.. I want it to smell nice for when Lucille comes back.. She'll be here soon!" Shiloh squealed gleefully.. Even though she'd never had a reply from Lucille she knew that her sister loved her very much.. For all the times she told her so and all times she showed her..

"Okay.." Phoebe answered casually, putting her headphone back in and continuing down the stairs with the bag of trash from cleaning her room.

As Phoebe stepped back inside from putting the trash out her mother gained her attention from the kitchen.. "Phoebe is that you?!" Julia called out..

"Yeah mum it's just me.."

"Okay.. Lucille should be here soon, why don't you get changed.." Julia replied popping her head around the corner..

Phoebe rolled her eyes before looking down to what she was wearing.. Grey jogging bottoms and a white vest top.. "Yeah okay.." She sighed dragging herself back up the stairs.

_____

"Chris I thought you said she was supposed to be here at two thirty?" Julia asked looking across the table to her husband Christopher.. The whole family had been sitting in the livingroom, waiting for buzzer to sound indicating the arrival of their banished daughter.. One who only wished to remain in exile.

"Yes, that's what time Alberto said they would be arriving.."

"What time is it mum?" Shiloh asked growing impatient along with everyone except Phoebe, who was only getting more anxious by the second.

"It's almost three o'clock love.." Julia replied while checking the gold watch on her wrist. Just then the buzzer for the perimeter gate chimed gaining all of their attention..

_________

NOTES-

Well I'm not sure where this story came from but here it is. I really hope you enjoyed reading this! Feel free to let me know what you think.

If you're reading my other stories.. then please accept my apology, It's not that I have lost the motivation to write, I just got carried away with this idea and decided to publish it since I didn't want to leave you with nothing.. I will continue the 'How I Survived' one before I continue 'The New Moons'. It would be nice to hear which story you would want more of.. But yeah anyway I'm sorry.