A new beginning ?

*****

New beginning ?

More like THE END

I liked the novel I was writing... I really tried to continue it, but I can't find the time

This is my first work and also a failed one

However....

I couldn't bring myself to erase all the work I had done

I'll leave it here, uncompleted...

To remind myself that I need to plan things, instead of writing when I have motivation...

Well...

Bye :)

******

Damien swung the sword one last time, it was such a powerful attack that the demon king was pierced instantly and died in a single hit. All the heroines jumped on the savior of the world and decided to live with him forever.

The kingdoms were finally at peace and everyo-

Who wrote this shit? There is NO drama , at all, not even a single event where the mc struggled. He could beat even god at this point

Then...

Where are the details ?? Damn author, at least take the time to describe the characters...

Sigh

Why did i waste so much time reading a cliche '?????' ?

What am i going to do with my life?

Wait....

Do I even have one to begin with ?

I'm in my twenties...

No friends....  I was so fucking pathetic

No family... This was my fault....

No girlfriend... I mean... Aveline is still the best

...

I don't even take care of myself....

I'm so frail looking i could break at any moment...

...

Hmm... Should I care about it ?

...

Maybe !

But I fucking don't !

...

This PC and dark room is all I always needed in life anyway.

Who cares about others?

2D girls are the BEST. 

...

When I say bullshit like this my face twitches for some reason. Maybe it's genetic or something....

Also... I want to correct myself

*Aveline IS the best

No space for others

[ You'll have to work hard to return to normal.... ]

...

Oh Saintess Aveline...

Here I raised my hand to the ceiling...

You're the only one I can love !

To be honest you carried the plot... Why did you become part of the hero's harem ?

That wasn't like something you would do....

...

See ?

Even the past me agrees with the current me

...

-Tch-

This shitty author, let me write a complain.

Click Click

''The Main character, Damien, is a fucking joke''

Click Click

''Maybe you should revise your life choices you absolute dumb ass''

''If i had his powers I wouldn't have done such shitty deeds. What's the point of saving the world if you can't give all of it to Aveline...''

...

Hm, Much better !

Click

''SENT''

...

[ What's much better ? ]

[ Also... What's the 'hm' ]

[ What were you... A child ? ]

I was really tired that night... [ It sounds like an excuse to me ]

[ From now on... ]

[ You'll be 'kid' ]

You should try to understand me...

You only heard what I said...

You don't even know what I wrote on the pc...

[ What's a pc ? ]

Oh... Right...

Doesn't matter, we'll lose the important part if we continue to talk...

Let me continue my narration

...

I probably shouldn't have done a marathon to finish that thousand chapters '?????'. What time was it ?

3:00... Maybe 4:00 a.m. 

It was one of those '?????' that you drop, and then read a second and third time...

I even gave money to the author...

I bought some of his merch....

Sigh

The main problem is that the fatigue from staying up all night clouded my judgement

...

[ "?????" ]-[ "What is he talking about" ] 

[ "I thought I would have been able to get something from his memories.... But everything is becoming even more confusing... ]

[ "How did he even know about my world beforehand ?" ]

...

[ "I'll ask later..." ]

...

I felt particularly depressed that day, If we want to compare, it's not like now is better...

However i feel more "stable" i think?

Well, that's not the point.

The main trigger for my death was my parents' old photo.

I never paid much attention to it actually.

It was more like a long forgotten memory of the past that was there to haunt me every now and then.

...

Yawn

...

This is the moment...

Ah shit..

I really fucked up here

...Turning around....

I saw it

Something that reminded me of events...

...

I DIDN'T want to be reminded of

...

...

Are you watching over me mom ?

What about you dad ?

....

You're constantly judging me.

I KNOW !

You died

You left me alone

I wanted money but the only thing I got was my name, Ethan.

You said it meant enduring or something similar, but I'm sure you were wrong.

I tried so hard to live like a human being and life didn't reward me. What did i get?

Humiliation and loneliness. 

Enduring?

...

Trying hard ?

...

Good words don't mean SHIT WHEN YOU'RE DEAD !

FUCK

YOU !

...

I don't even have the will to live anymore

...

I covered my eyes with my hands...

...

Ahah.... 

I was crying...

...

Sob

...

As i expressed my suicidal thoughts...

I felt a chill down my spine

...

I thought Aveline was watching me.

I mean the single edition, ultra limited statue of her, that was the only copy in the whole world....

...

I even started imagining things.... 

Damn...

Why.... Was I like this...

I... Literally.... Dug my own grave because of my own delusions...

...

And yet... I think Aveline is much more valuable than money...

Even after 'that'

Even when she....

...

Now.... You'll hear the end of my puny and worthless life

...

So... you're watching over me...

You don't want me to end my life ♥️...

...

Wait ?

Is that really what you want me to....

Or....

I get it !

Ahah aha

aha ah

ah

I finally get it !

...

I did really go insane.

My thoughts weren't rational anymore.

My death was certain

...

Don't worry, I'm coming for you!

...

I didn't even worry about my shoes

Sbam

I just opened the door

Clomp Clomp Clomp

I climbed the external stairs and after I reached the rooftop....

Without a hint of hesitation....

....

I jumped...

...

I needed to die... Die, to get a new life in the world of the '?????' I was reading...

Reach Aveline... And help her....

I wanted to be her hero

...

[ You... ]

[ Certainly changed ]

[ Still... Are you sure yours is not an obsession? ]

Yes, No doubt, it's just love !

...

As I fell, I really started to worry about what I had just done.

...

You know... Seeing yourself falling from a building is a strange feeling

...

What did I do in my life ?

I studied hard at first...

But then... 

I only played video games and continuously read manhwas, novels....

...

You could say that...

If my life was a game

...

Then... I would now be...

On my second run

...

Eh...What would you even know...

...

Splash

...

I died...

...

During the fall, all kinds of memories returned...

From those I deemed important, to those that seemed insignificant...

...

Do you want to know which one I truly regretted the most ?

...

The memories with my family....

...

Because If I damage myself It's completely right...

But the problem rises...

When I'm the one to blame for someone's else pain...

[ "Kid...." ]

...

Let's not get too emotional !

I still have a lot to tell to you !

Blind old man !

[ Blind old man ?! ]

...

Also...

...

No time for sad feelings....

...

I have to kill THE bad bitch

...

The one... 

Who revived me... 

And summoned me here....

The one...

Who I am about to meet

...

-Welcome to a new world ,traveler-

That's the first thing I heard, as I woke up in a completely white room

I turned around...

Nobody was there

...

"Is this heaven ?"

NO heaven for you, past me

"I guess white would mean good right?" 

You were wrong about this...

Still...

It might be that dying put some sense in my head...

Because I was strangely calm

...

I mean...I won't be... Later

...

-No, traveler, you died and your strong desire lead you here-

...

"She has such a relaxing voice"

EH?!

"I think she just read my mind..."

...

-You're right, I can do things like that....-

...

-If you're scared....-

-You don't have to worry... I don't have any ill intention-

...

-By the way... We still haven't introduced ourselves-

...

-Please.... Rise your head.... Child...-

...

-I'm right here-

...

We'll get my reaction in a few seconds...

I was too stunned to speak

...

Now that I think about it....

I'm so lucky to have you.

You're completely different from her... You can't even read my thoughts

It's possible to have a human conversation

[ Technically I'm the ??? ?? ???????? ]

[ You should pay a bit of respect ]

This was meant to be a compliment....

...

Anyway...

...

Wow...

...

After I saw her figure my mind panicked and my thoughts stopped, a wimp like me couldn't handle the pressure from a real life woman... Nor the Goddess herself

You can pretty much imagine what happened when I saw her flying in front of me....

Her golden hair were almost glowing, they made me feel not worthy of such a figure.

Well...

A stunning bitch...

Remains a bitch !

...

"She must be the one who saved me !"

....

-You're right traveler-

...

-I'm the goddess of light, Theia-

-I have heard your desire to save a certain Saintess-

-Please become my sword against all demons-

...

You heard what she just said ?

The demon I should have killed was no one else but 

HER

...

"Does she mean Aveline?"

"My plan worked?!" 

"I'll be able to meet her ?"

...

It seems I have a talent to suicide, because I jumped (into the offer) a second time.

...

I even tried to be 'respectful...'

...

I accept your request....

However... Ehm

I want to know what I will get as cheats, you know...

...

At this point I was so excited that my face, like always, twitched...

I seemed like a dog who desperately wanted a treat... 

...

"I can't say I made one of Lloyd faces...."

...

Will i get the system?

You know, that thing that is every man's dream.

What about my body?

Who will I become?

What about mana, aura....

I want to scream.

[ If you truly want...You can... ]

[ You're technically the only one here ]

Isn't there a 1.5x speed to see this?

It's too embarrassing...

...At least she gave me a good body...

...

-Of course, traveler !-

-You will get everything you want !-

-That's the least I can do for you !- 

-I have already prepared a new body for you-

-After all you are going to save my precious Aveline-

-That's your ONLY mission-

...

I accepted the offer almost instantly...

Like a dumb ass...

...

The truth is...

She never called me hero....

...

I was just a nameless traveler...

She never asked for my name...

An expendable

Disposable

An ant

Entertainment

That's what I was....

...

I'm ready then.

Please send me when you're ready.

...

-Good luck !- 

...

-"Hugh"-

-"Why did I have to be the one to talk to this eyesore..."-

...

An unknown light-like substance filled the air and covered me

...

It was incredibly dense and oppressing....

...

I soon began to disappear, as my soul was being brought to the new body.

...

My consciousness faded away...

...

Nothing could be heard

[ ???? is pitying you for your choice ]

[ ???? is wishing you luck ]

[ ???? is giving you Darkness Advent (1 time use)]

Oh, I don't remember this happening...

So that's what caused the..

This explains a few things.

You really helped me, ???? 

Argh !

Why did i trust that bitch?

Didn't i have even a single ounce of caution....

...

Sigh

Am i not right ?

You should know her well, ????

[ Indeed ]

[ Ours is a long term relationship... ]

I mean... You're both ????

...

...

Oh...Finally !

I'm about to wake up...

...

Don't worry ???? we are almost there, just a few days and you'll understand....

???? ????? ????????? ???? 

[ Damien 99.9% (-0.1%) ]

[ Ethan 0.1% (+0.1%)]