Chapter 27 When it is all

"Thank you for doing this." Mia round the corner of the kitchen entrance with an empty glass in her hand, she scan across the room, she was referring to me cleaning the kitchen.

"Join me." I invite her to sit on the opposite side of the table from where I was sitting, appreciating a well-deserved espresso while scrolling through the emails on my phone, but I quickly exit placing the phone face down on the table to be able to give all my attention to Mia. I needed to have a very important conversation with her and I am afraid if she stood or sat, for that matter, too close to me I will easily be distracted and we needed to have a lightheaded and serious discussion of what we were doing and what we wanted from each other.

"I expected that much." She grins planting her little ass down on the wooden chair on the other side of the table and placing the glass next to a second bottle of wine and although I would much rather not open the bottle I go against my own desire and pick it up to do exactly that, and give what she is craving, but she quickly places her hand over mine stopping me in mid action. "You don't need to get me drunk to have your way with me." Her humor with what I believe was flirting would be the end of me. I get up and pull out a cup for her from the cupboard and fill it with espresso and place it in front of her before taking in my seat again. "I guess we really do need to talk." She shrug.

"We do." I answer or agree, not being sure if she was asking or making a statement. I take a sip of my espresso watching her do the same before I slowly and carefully start to lay down my cards on the table. "Mia-Amore that I love you is no secret and what I feel for you is undeniably deep, I cannot even try to imagine what my life would be like without you, but if this is only from my side then I need to hear it now. You need to be honest with me, please don't tell me what you think I want to hear. If you decide to be with me by choice then you need to understand that it means with me completely. Wherever I go you go, when I ask things from you, even things that you don't understand at that instant, I need you to trust me and not question me. When there is situations that occur and believe me there will be times, a lot of times that you might feel like tonight, but we cannot talk to each other like that. You come to me in private and we sit down open a bottle of wine and we talk about it. Don't wait until everything builds up and then let your emotions get the upper hand..."

"But..." Mia interject and a frown form on her forehead.

"Let me finish." I hold my hand slightly up in the air and she opens her mouth once more but immediately close it again granting me the chance to continue, even though I could see it to be a very difficult task for her. "This isn't something I want you and me to start a fight about. This is me being honest with you about what I need from a relationship with you as well as giving you a glimpse of what being my woman would actually entail.if this is not what you want or you don't feel the same then this is the time to tell me. If you don't agree to this then I will walk out the door and never come back. You will not ever hear from me again and I promise you that you will never need to worry about your safety or your family's. You won't owe me a thing." I close my eyes at the thought of her considering the latter option. "Freedom with no strings attached. You can start over without any debt, stress or anyone holding you back, a clean slate."

"Damian." She places both her hands over mine, wrapping her fingers over mine. "The moment I saw you I realized that you are the most beautiful man I have ever laid my eyes on, how could somebody not fall in love with you? You only grew more handsome to me every day resulting in me becoming more aware of what you do to me, but each and every day I got to see a glimpse of who the man behind all of this is." She raise her hands pointing them to my shoulders and lower her arms through the air, creating an outline of my figure. " It scares the shit out of me." She admit to being scared of me, which does hurt a slightly but I understood that. What I was feeling for hurt was a little frightening and what I was asking of her even more so. "The things I have gone through and the ways you made me feel at times were enough to drag me under the water and leave me there to drown." I was slowly but surely murdering her without even being aware of what I was doing. I attempt to remove my hand from under her's, but she tightens her grip on my hands turning het knuckles white, she keeps my hands in place and I do not fight her on this. "Exposing me to all of this, making me explore a side of me that I was always taught to hide away in a very dark place so far away that no one is ever allowed to know of it's existence. It was always there, but you made me accept that part of me and by doing that I realised that everyone consisted of both and you showed me that to be true. You shared both your dark and light sides with me and I love you for that Mr. Damian. How could I not when you fit me so perfectly? I will follow you to the ends of the world, but I won't be arm candy. I need to be part of everything. No lies. No half-truths. No need-to-know-basis.

"No " I answer too quickly not even considering it for a second. "You can do everything you want, start your own practice, become a master in the financial world, start a whole new career for all that matters, but stay out of this world where I cannot always protect you."

"Then teach me to protect myself?"

"I can't." I breathe. "I won't be able to think clearly if you are in danger and that will be dangerous for the both of us." This have proven to be true more than once now.

"This is my condition Damian. It is all or nothing."

"What you are asking me to do is impossible."

"I don't want to replace Achille" She grin. I knew this, but I didn't want her involved although I knew she already is in way deeper than I ever anticipated she would be and she was a natural, even tough I hated to admit it. The night at the restaurant comes to mind. She didn't even hesitate putting the pen through his eye. She might just need to work on controlling her temper a little better, but that is something I am making my mission to learn her to control her emotions. "Why don't you just give me the job that I originally wanted to apply for?"