Rocky Road

I don't own Fallout.

A good collection of the Vault 69 Dwellers stood outside the vault, most for the first time ever to see off Swat, Raid, Jack and Casey. All three of them were packed and ready, canteens filled, food prepared, and even a few bullets refreshed.

Masha and Satsuki both hugged Swat, then Casey. Jack on the other hand stood offside with a couple of vault girls, both blonde. But one was a doctor, the other was an engineer. "Hey, Brat. Come here for a second." Swat sighed and stood by the old ghoul as the engineer knelt down and removed his prosthetic leg. Swat took an arm, allowing Jack to stay standing as she produced an odd-looking leg device. A more advanced prosthetic. It was made from a lightweight solid metal, had springs, and shocks, and most importantly padding.

Jack laughed as the doctor aided the engineer in attaching the new leg. He stood steadily on it, bouncing up and down as he began walking in a smooth steady gait. "Now THIS is a leg!" he grinned proudly at the two, who smiled kindly back. "I'd hug you two but I don't want to make you-" before he could finish they both gave him a hug. He looked touched… it had been a long time since anyone had hugged him willingly. He hugged them back as they stepped away.

"Ready to go old ghoul?" Swat noted as Jack strode easily towards him.

"Ready enough." He replied eyeing Satsuki and Masha, spreading his hands wide for a hug, "Well? Where's my hug?" he said. Satsuki glared at him but Masha, holding back tears, hugged him. "Ah don't worry we'll be right back." She gave him a kiss on the cheek with a smile before adding kindly, "You were my favorite." She giggled and stepped away as Shakespeare stroked the brahmin's head, the right one; Juliet.

"I shall take good care of RJ awaiting your return." He said to Casey.

"Oh, keep her." Casey said shrugging dismissively, "Can't take her anyway. She'd probably get eaten if we tired."

Shakespeare merely smiled, "…Parting is such sweet sorrow."

"Oh come one we'll be back in a month. Two tops." Swat replied shaking the big mutant's hand, "…Keep this place safe for us." Raid rubbed up against Masha and Satsuki's legs and they lovingly hugged the big wolf.

"Tis a promise." Shakespeare said, as rather forlornly the group waved their goodbyes, and the Vaultdwellers did the same before returning to the vault.

"I feel like a new man." Jack smirked, keeping stride with Swat and Casey easily as Raid skipped around him. Eyeing the leg like a brand new toy. "I could dance over the Rockies!"

"You won't have to." Swat replied, shouldering his pack. "We're not going over them."

"We aren't going over the Rocks?" Casey asked surprised, "Seriously? Are we going around them? That's going to take more than a month Brat."

"We are going through them." Swat replied with a knowing grin as they both looked at him oddly.

"There's no way through the Rockies. You got to go over them or around them." Jack replied abruptly.

"There is a way. Casey can I borrow your map?" Casey finding a nearby hollowed-out car hood laid out the map as Jack and Swat crowded around it.

"Help yourself but there's nothing marked on the map east of the Great Rocks." She replied, "Another reason for me to head that way." She noted with a smirk as Swat began to trace the image of the Great Rocks with his finger.

"When I went over them with Gladys we took a hiking trail up here…" Jack said, gesturing to the more northern section of the mountains, "It's a walk from here but safer than going around."

"It used to be safe but now a Super Mutant Behemoth took up residence two years ago. Calls himself Big 'Orn." Swat shrugged at Jack who looked annoyed, "Been a long while since you left Novac Jack."

"Hmph." Jack grunted.

"Besides I told you two we're going through them." Swat replied, gesturing to about the center of the mountains. "Take us two to three days."

"How?" Jack asked as Casey examined the map thoughtfully. "Did you shoot a path through?" he asked sarcastically.

Swat smiled, "…Do you know where the biggest Vault is located?" he said smugly, tapping the picture of the mountains. "Right here. Vault 55."

"So?" Casey asked curiously.

"So." Swat repeated, "When the Vault was first made, they started digging here," he tapped the eastern side, "And here." He tapped the west, "The teams were given completely different designs and plans and no communications. They just kept tunneling and digging until they finally met in the middle." He tapped the center of the mountain. "Now the problem with that was that the whole place was a lyberanth."

"…A labyrinth?" Jack corrected, now looking at the map with more interest.

"Yeah, that. What you said." Swat replied pointing at Jack, silently thanking him before continuing without complaint. "A labyrinth. Impossible for anyone to get through it without a guide or going mad. The Vault dwellers that managed to get in there before the bombs dropped figured that out real quick…"

"…And how are we going to do it without a guide or going mad?" Jack asked skeptically, eyeing his protégé with his good eye.

"By getting a bit off both… and a couple of shiny things." Swat added, turning to Casey, "How attached are you to that silver pocket watch?"

"…Not very." Casey said cautiously, eyeing her watch for a second then asking "…why?"

"We need something shiny to pay for passage." Swat replied as, ominously, Raid began to growl. Immediately Swat drew his sequoia and glanced in the direction Raid was growling. "…Radscorpions." He said firmly as a pair of the poisonous monstrosities began crawling parallel to them.

"Shit." Casey replied, arming herself with her assault rifle but Jack tapped them both on the shoulder.

"Wait. They aren't attacking. Save your bullets for the things actually trying to kill us." The radscorpions scrambled out of sight, and Swat and Casey stood down. "So we need shiny things?" he continued casually.

"Yeah, gold and silver pocket watches, rings, particularly shiny metals. Trinkets that honestly barely anyone in the wasteland uses." Jack snorted and rolled his good eye, "It'll make sense when we get there."

"How far is it from here?" Casey asked, beginning to roll up the map as Raid scratched his ears by her feet, she helped him with a small smile on her face, soon his too.

"…We should be a stone's throw away in two days…" Swat replied as Casey and Jack moaned slightly. "Come on…" he replied walking on with Raid just behind him, "Keep whining and you'll draw those radscorpions back."

Jack snorted, "…He does hate the taste of radscorpion." He said airily, following behind with Casey beside him.

"Swat doesn't seem to like eating much of anything." Casey grinned, "Was he always like that?"

"Well, we found him when he was about four…" Jack noted, keeping his voice casual, "Wouldn't eat anything that didn't come out of a can until we killed a Great Boar. Couldn't stop him gobbling that up." He then thought about it for a minute then added, "…Doesn't like radscorpion or mirelurk last I checked… although that second one might have been because of that time I tried to teach him to swim…"

"You tossed me into a river infested with those fucking things!" Swat shouted.

"…Hasn't gotten over it yet." Jack added dismissively, "Didn't speak to me for a week."

"I didn't speak from the trauma!" Casey released a restrained laugh, and onward they walked.

The first night they bunkered down in an old shop, sleeping on the floor. A few molerats and ghouls, barely any trouble. However the real trouble came on the second night, the Great Rocks were just a horizon away. There were no buildings that they could comfortably sleep in, but Jack found an old 18-wheeler, its back still intact with a working door.

"It will have to do." Swat said, helping Jack open the sliding door upward and lifting Casey inside.

"Bunch of crates… but we can move those around." She said, shifting a few as Raid leaped into the back as well. Jack and Swat followed.

"Let's get them to the end, we can use them as a wall." They shifted a few crates to the edge of the door, using them like a barricade as opposed to closing the back of the truck. Of which Casey asked…

"Why not just close the back of the truck?" As Jack sighed, sitting down.

"And let it get stuffy in here? Damn wasteland's already a hot hellhole. Plus the dog gets gassy."

"Only when you give him fancy lad snack cakes." Swat scolded sitting down behind the crates with Raid as he rested his head on Swat's leg. Casey sitting on Swat's left, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Actually, that was me." Casey said smiling, raising her hand. Swat glared mockingly at her, but she pouted, ruffling Raid's face with her hand as he happily moaned at her toying, "What? I can't say no to that face…" she cooed as Raid gave them another helping of 'that face'.

"Try harder." Swat noted.

In the middle of happy petting, however… Raid suddenly gnashed his sharp teeth growling violently as Casey yanked away. "Ah! Whoa."

"Jack!" Swat shouted as they drew weapons. Immediately bullets peppered the crates as they all dropped in the truck splinters of wood flying up to clatter against the ceiling as hooting and hollering echoed outside in the night. "Shit!" hissed Swat.

"Raiders!" Jack and Casey shouted together as Jack scrambled to Swat's other side, leaning his back against the crate.

"Come on fuckers let's go!!!!!" shrieked a raider as the boxes were peppered with bullets. "Bring out your bitches and your food!"

"And your caps!" shouted another rather.

"Yeah caps!" roared the first raider.

Swat had his eyes closed, he then tapped the boxes slightly to his right… then just above his left ear. Jack nodded as Casey looked confused.

"Hurry the fuck up!" shouted another Raider as Swat then tapped beside Casey's face. And she quickly realized what Swat was doing, marking their positions by the sound of their voices. She smiled. Holding her rifle and winking at them.

"One. Two. THREE!" Swat counted before Jack, Casey and Swat all stood up. Three raiders quickly fell down as bullet holes suddenly appeared on their bodies. Jack leaped over the crate wall, grinning proudly as his new leg held steady. Couldn't do that before on the old clunker. He approached the dead raiders and quickly began to check their corpses.

"…Nothin!" he noted, kicking on in the side firmly, he sounded insulted that they had the audacity to be carrying anything useful. "They don't have anything!"

"Well look around Jack…" Swat replied, leaping over the crate himself to approach them, "Probably wandering around to find supplies themselves."

"Well we can't stay here they'll be scavenger bait and I'm NOT digging another shallow grave…" Jack noted as Casey shoved a ruin crate aside to let Raid leave and to leap down herself. She moaned slightly, rolling her head back.

"Oh come ON we've been walking for hours…" she trod on the corpses, "And it's getting dark who knows what's going to be out there!"

Jack and Swat merely shrugged, but Raid trotted on, followed soon by Swat as he noted. "…At least we'll get there sooner."

Hours later daylight was rising over the great rocky mountain tops as Casey sighed and lay her head on Swat's shoulder. Jack yawned as Swat led them towards a man-made tunnel… practically carrying Casey as Raid yawned, whining slightly as soon they came to signature Vault doors… 55 stamped in faded lettering.

"Welcome to Vault 55." Swat said, "…Let's hope he's on this side of the mountain."

"Who?" Jack asked, letting his eye wander around the walls.

"Our guide." Jack then eyed Swat curiously as Swat entered the tunnels and began looking around, checking the few rooms nearby, including a secured door just to the right of the entrance. "…Itsame?" he said, as Jack and blinked at him curiously. "…Itsame-eee?" he said again, letting his voice echo in the obviously empty halls of the Vault.

"What are you-" Casey began but Swat and Jack held up a finger together, listening carefully.

Pitter-patter. Pitter-patter… something was echoing in the tunnels. Getting louder and louder. Jack stood protectively in front of Casey, drawing a revolver but keeping it low.

"Hah… hah… hah…" breathed something louder, and louder… then a wispy gasp and a little chuckle echoed in the hallways as a faint green glow flickered in the dark… then a ghoul crawling, on all fours, appeared. Various parts of his bare skin were wrapped in florescent green moss.

What wasn't covered by moss was covered by wearing old faded clothes; shorts, a shirt and a loose tie, along with a holey ranger hat. One might have recognized it as a boy scout uniform. On his right chest pocket was a clipped name tag with faded letters that look like they said 'Its-a-me'. He was barefoot and his fingers were long and spindly, crawling almost silently on the smooth vault floor. He squatted before Swat and gave him a huge, mostly toothless grin. He seemed to only have nine teeth…

"Yes? YES!..." he hissed excitedly, jumping and 'dancing' on the floor. As he crawled towards Swat like a devolved primate, lifting himself up to look closer at Swat. Who seemed undisturbed by the ghoul. "Swat!" he cheered, bouncing in place like a dancing monkey "Friendses! You came back to see Itsame!" Jack recoiled, staring at the ghoul as if it was the most horrifying thing he'd ever seen. "You bring him shinnies? Pretties? Sparkles?"

"I might have Itsame." Swat said, almost kindly, kneeling down to look at him more thoroughly. As the ghoul shook excitedly "I brought some friends this time. I'd like you to take them with me through the mountain…" he then held up the silver pocket watch. Giggling madly, Itsame snatched it from Swat's loose grip. Caressing it lovingly as he crawled towards the secured door.

"Shinnies… pretty pretty shinnies…" he cooed fascinated with the watch, opening the door and crawling inside… after a moment of silence, a pale sparkling light appeared from the room, dancing and reflective as Swat waited for Itsame to return.

Soon… the light turned off and Itsame crawled from the room. Glancing at Swat. "…Pretties. It's pretty… but need more…" Three friends. He held up five fingers, clearly unable to tell the difference between 5 and 3... Or far too insane too... "Three pretties."

"Seriously?" Swat sighed, "…Can't I owe you a favor? Remember? Remember when the bad men came, and I helped you? I made them leave you alone forever." Itsame fidgeted uncomfortably. "We're friends Itsame and we really need to get through quickly."

"…One more pretties…" he said softly, trying not to look Swat in the eye when he said it. "Just one more… Swat friend. Itsame help friend Swat and Swat friends." Swat slowly nodded in agreement as Itsame smiled and danced.

"Ugh…" Casey mumbled as Itsame bounced excitedly as Swat walked towards them. Jack still staring at the Ghoul. "Come on! I'm exhausted can't we rest just a little bit?"

"…Stay here with Raid." Swat said, relenting and realizing that they had been pushing hard. "I'll go find another 'shiny' for him…" he whistled, Raid's ears perking up as he pointed to Casey. The big wolf approached the caravanner standing beside her protectively. "Itsame." He said as the ghoul stopped his little monkey dance, giving them his rapt attention. "…Can you let my friend sleep in a room?"

"Yes! Yes! Lots of rooms! Lots for friends. Come! Come Swat friend!" he grinned at Casey, it might have been an attempt to be adorable waving for her to follow him as she and Raid walked slightly into the vault and into a small room.

Swat began walking out of the tunnel, Jack right behind him. "…Brat." He said suddenly very serious.

"Hmm?"

"…If I ever get like that… do something about it." Swat head turned to look at Jack. He was looking at the floor, downcast and a little fearful. Suddenly being reminded of the fate that awaited all ghouls, shook him to his very core.

"…Sure Jack." Swat said quietly. Inwardly knowing that he never, EVER could do what Jack was asking him. "…I'll take care of you." He added, meaning something completely different from what Jack was thinking. Jack nodded and silently, they went to find another 'shiny'.

Back at Vault 69 Shakespeare and Masha were pondering just how to get RJ into the vault since they couldn't leave her outside in the elements. Shakespeare will probably have to carry her. Then suddenly a voice cried out over the air.

"TO BATTLE!!!"

"Wha-" Shakespeare said absently as a towering muscular blonde woman swung a deadly metal oar towards him. "AAHHH!!" he shrieked completely shocked before he lashed out, saving his own life by catching the oar below the 'blade' and stumbling back at the sheer force of her strength.

"Shakespeare!" Masha shouted horrified. "Stop! What are you doing!?" she asked the powerfully built but beautiful blonde woman.

The woman, blinked at Masha absently, giving her a friendly smile. "Fear not beautiful maiden I shall save you from this Mutant!"

"He's my friend! Please stop!" Masha shouted as the woman blinked at her surprised.

"Oh!" she glanced at the somewhat struggling Shakespeare before letting up. "Apologies! I merely assumed."

"No! No, it's quite alright…" Shakespeare mumbled nervously, "It is a natural reaction…"

The blonde nodded absently, deciding to just let the attempted murder rest. "…Well… may I ask. Is THIS vault 69?"

"…It is…" Masha said slowly as Shakespeare tended to the nervous RJ. "Who are you?"

Smiling proudly, she struck a heroic pose. "I am Galoria! Princess of the Bourbon Street Gator Slayers! The heir to my tribe! Destroyer of the Crypt Dwellers! Sharptooths! and the Lowlander Muckmen!"

"…Oh, she's one of them…" Shakespeare said quietly to himself. COMPLETELY ignoring the irony.

"Uh… Hi? I'm Masha and this is Shakespeare." She said gesturing to her super mutant friend. Who nodded nervously at Galoria.

"Hello!" Galoria replied smiling, dismissing the fact that mere moments before she was trying to kill the friendly mutant. "I have traveled for many moons and gotten incredibly lost in my search for the man known as Swat. I have been told that he came this way. Is he here?"

"Oh…" Masha blinked at her curiously, wondering why exactly such an… impressive woman was looking for Bard. "He was… but he went further east, and then he's going to the frozen north to visit his mother's grave…"

"Indeed?" Galoria looked thoughtful. "…I suppose it WOULD be proper to introduce myself to his kin. Even if they have parted from this world… Thank you, fair Masha!" she smiled at the very, very confused Masha before embracing her in a slightly less bone-crushing hug. "I shall continue my journey to find my husband Swat!" she dropped Masha and continued heading east, "Farewell! I apologize again!!"

Masha stumbled slightly trying to regain her balance, then, blinking in confusion, turned to Shakespeare. "…Did she say, husband?"

End of chapter