ch 21

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Edward's POV:

I didn't like this.

I didn't like this one bit. My love was alone on the territory of the Werewolves.

Honestly, going in and out in a house full of Vampire the most natural think in the world, being attacked by a bloodthirsty, sadistic Vampire no problem, going to meet young, immature, dangerous Werewolves where's the harm in that? Sure why not.

But is scared to go up in the attic after dark falls and wouldn't even set one foot into the basement at night and when she sees a syringe she able to run even faster then I am, figuratively spoken of cause.

I had to shake my head at that for what felt the millions time as I paced along the treaty line. I stopped pacing around and pinched the bridge of my nose before I sighed.

There were two souls battling in my chest. The old me who was frantic, crazed with fear and paranoia for my loves safety and the new me who wanted to believe that she was going to be alright.

She could hold her own ground if she wanted to. She proved it with James and she was armed. My love knew the dangers. She knew when to run.

It is ridiculous, really afraid of an injection but would happily fight against Vampires and Werewolves.

I sighed again.

She would be alright. I repeated it over and over in my head. She would be aright. She would be soon back in my arms.

She is my world. The centre of my universe. The power and depth of my attachment to her was something unknown to me. I never thought I would be able to feel something this strong.

She understands me, she knows me like none else. She knows all my darkest sins, my past and still loves me with all her heart.

She has my life in her hands. Every look of her, every smile, every little giggle, the shinning in her eyes, the warmth of her touch, the power of her love I'm craving it like a starved man. I'm craving her presence, her touch, her love, her kiss, her everything.

Being away from her caused me physical pain though I would never tell her that.

I don't want her to be there with the mutts but that's what she decided had to be done even though I was against it.

But I knew better then to try and keep her from doing what she wanted with force even though I could.

My love was headstrong if she wanted something she would find a way to get it no matter what.

She is stubborn and does things her way. My love is understanding and forgiving but gets easily angry if someone tries to control her and keeps secrets from her.

And none better say the sentence "It's for your own good." To her that ticks her off unbelievably. She told me what happened in the four books that tell about my life.

My love made her opinion about my behaviour clearly known. It's weird but when she was so angry with me she looked so unbelievable sexy.

And there my thoughts go again. I'm behaving like a gentleman. I am a gentleman but in my mind I'm a man.

A man if not to say a caveman, everything about her drives me in. It's unbelievably hard to restrain myself.

Sometimes I just want to throw the whole gentleman thing out of the window and have my ways with her.

Patience Edward. Patience. I reminded myself once again.

Besides now was not the time to think about that kind of thing. Sometimes my mind was quite a burden.

I was pacing again torn between the two souls in my chest. Trying to convince myself that everything would be fine.

"Edward, are you O.K.?" Jasper asked as he suddenly stood next to me.

"You are an emphat Jasper you know I'm not."

He had a sheepish smile on his face as he sent me a wave of calm.

"Thanks."

"She'll be fine. Alice saw you with her tonight. So don't worry."

"Sure because you wouldn't worry if it was Alice." I barked at him. He looked guilty and understanding.

"Listen I'm sorry Jasper I just...."

"I know man," He sighed and put his hand on my shoulder looking sympathetic at me. "she is a Cullen woman and they always get their way. Welcome in the club brother."

I just looked at him incredulous but I knew what he meant. Our mates had us on the short leash.

"Want me to keep you company?"

I thought about it for a minute.

"Thanks but I'm going to be fine."

He squeezed my shoulder before he took of into the forest.

A Cullen woman. Yes, that was my Anna. She had her own head just like Esme, Rose and Alice and she could get her way with me.

I tried to dazzle her, like she like to call it, into staying but in the end I ended up being the one who was seduced.

My love is dangerous and she knows exactly how to play her cards and my dear sisters made it even worse. As if it wasn't hard enough to resist her sometimes.

I had no other choice then to wait here until she would leave this godforsaken place and be back in my arms.

Anna's POV:

Sam was standing in front of me his face cast down looking at the ground before he looked up and spoke.

"Listen I just wanted to say thanks for saving them. I still don't understand how you can…." He was trying hard to keep his temper down. "and I never will but still thanks for what you have done."

"Sure no problem and you don't have to understand just to respect my decision."

Sam nodded slowly and thoughtfully at that.

I didn't want to tell him but looking at him now...…..though I still wasn't a wolf-girl and never would be, they deserved the truth even if only the part about themselves.

"Listen there is something I've got to tell you. I know things, I can't explain it to you. You just have to trust me."

Sam looked at me thoughtfully before he nodded.

"I guess you earned that trust."

I smiled at him. He wasn't that bad in person well at least not as much as I thought he would be.

"Jake, Seth, Embry, Brady and Collin will all also become Werewolves."

"But Brady and Collin….." He looked at me stunned.

"Are very young I know but there is another thing as well."

"And that would be?" He asked wary, scared of what I was going to tell him.

"Leah will also become a member of the pack."

"No, she is a girl….." He looked at me disbelieving and angry.

"I know but she will also become a Werewolf. I know it's non of my business but you should tell her about the whole imprinting thing before she phases or else it might be hard with her around, though I can't say if will be better if you tell her now but it's worth a shot."

I smiled sympathetically at him that was a lot for him to take in. I wasn't planning to tell him this but it somehow just came over me

"You are a strange girl." He stated after a while. I just shrugged my shoulders.

"Guess we aren't the only ones with a burden to carry."

He meant himself and all the members of the pack. I understood that it was hard for them. They couldn't have an own life, go to college or move out of La Push.

For the first time since I got know about Twilight I actually sympathized with the wolfs. I gave him a weak smile.

"I'll better go back and see how Quil is doing." Sam said before taking off.

I just stood there for a few minutes and looked at the dark night sky that was filled with bright twinkling stars.

It was full moon and I couldn't help but think how fit the full moon for today's events was. We had a full moon and Werewolves appeared.

It made me wonder again my boyfriend is a Vampire I know Werewolves does that mean there is a chance I would meet a Wizard to or an alien any time soon?

I giggled at that thought as I made my way to Billy's house. As I was walking I saw a figure sitting at the roadside getting closer I recognized Jake. I approached him carefully.

"Hey, Jake you all right?"

He looked at me with a mix of disbelieve, anger, hopelessness and defeat.

"Do I look like I am?"

"Nope. Wanna talk?" I asked him as I sat down next to him.

"What will happen now?" He asked not looking at me his voice laced with fear.

"In a few months you will become a Werewolf and you will love it. Well parts of it. The speed and the strength."

"How do you….." His head shot up but he stopped himself. "Never mind." He sighed.

"I know how you feel right now."

"Yeah sure." He snored at me.

"I had a normal human life as well before supernatural took over. I wasn't always Buffy."

He looked at me guilty and apologetically. This Jake was nice I wondered why I didn't like him when I read the books and that's when it hit me.

"You know Jake turning into a wolf won't be the only change that will happen."

"What do you mean?" He asked puzzled.

"Your personality will also. Please try not to become too much of a jerk."

He looked at me strangely.

"Do I even want to know how you know all of this?"

I only shook my head and smiled.

"You won't tell."

"Sorry but that's personal."

We sat there in silence before he spoke again.

"Did you lie to me about Bella?" again he wasn't looking at me but at the ground.

"Jake I know that she is able to fall in love with you but if you two have a future I don't know. That's up to the two of you."

"So she isn't my imprint?" He looked at me with pain in his dark eyes.

"All I can say is ...….I don't know. I'm sorry I wish I could tell you something else but I really don't know." I smiled at him weakly.

"Thanks anyway." He said as he stood up and began running to the beach all of the sudden.

I sighed and stood up wanting to reach Billy's house as fast as I could. I had enough Werewolf for one night.

Finally arriving at Billy's house, without further interruption, I searched for Kevin only to find him on the couch sleeping soundly and totally drunk.

Apparently he and some of his friends had a little bit too much of their self made alcohol. Kevin and four other guys were completely out.

I stood before him my hands on my hips and sighed frustrated, glaring at his sleeping frame.

"You can leave him here. Josh has to go to Forks tomorrow so he can take him home." Emily said as she was coming out of the kitchen.

"Guess that will be for the best. Thank you Emily."

She came close to me and took my hands in hers, looking directly into my eyes. If she wouldn't be together with Sam and so involved with the Werewolves I bet we could have been very good friends.

"You are a really nice girl Anna I just wish you would change your mind in regards of ...."

"We can't choose who we love, now can we?" I smiled at her warmly.

She smiled back understanding letting go of my hands and pulled me into a tight hug.

"Just be careful." She whispered into my ear.

Pulling back I smiled at her. "I always am."

Grabbing Kevin's car keys out of the pocket of his jacket I said my goodbyes to Emily and got into the car.

Driving back to Forks I suddenly saw someone standing in the middle of the street. Coming closer I could see that it was Edward who was pacing around nervously.

It must have been the treaty line there. I pulled the car over to the roadside and Edward was immediately at my side of the car.

He opened the door crouched down and took my hand in his looking anxious at me.

"Love, are you alright? Why are you alone? The wolfs didn't do anything to you did they?"

"First yes I am alright. Second Kevin is drunk and sleeping soundly and I don't think that even a bomb exploding near him could wake him so I left him there and last but not least I tell you later. Right now I just want home and sleep."

Right on cue I yawned. It was near one o'clock now and I was really tired.

"Of cause love let me drive."

I smiled at him unbuckled my seatbelt and gave him a kiss on his lips before getting out of the car.

Edward went with me to the other side and held the door open for me. I fell asleep during the drive and woke up as he parked in the driveway at Kevin's house.

I made my way into the bathroom took my clothes of and ordered Edward to put them into the washing machine.

Alice had burned the clothes I had on during my last visit in La Push and I didn't want that to happen again I liked those jeans.

After I had showered I excided the bathroom. My hair was still wet I was just too tired to blow dry it.

Edward was sitting on my bed wearing only his boxers waiting for me. He looked like a lost puppy in this moment.

I went to him to stand between his legs and threaded my fingers through his messy hair. His hands were on my hips as he placed his forehead on my stomach.

I put my arms round him. My right hand in his hair the other stroking small circles on his back.

"Do I still smell of wet dog?" I asked with a little smile in my voice.

"No, you smell heavenly."

He pressed his forehead harder into my stomach, inhaled deeply before standing up at Vampire speed.

I was used to this by now and it only sometimes startled me anymore when I was deep in thoughts and when I wasn't expecting it at all.

Edward looked deep into my eyes he cupped my cheek gently, running his thumb over my skin.

"I'm sorry for being such a worrywart. It's just I don't know what scares me more the fact that you could be attacked by Werewolves or the fact that you would fight back if that were to happen."

"Of cause I would fight back!"

He sighed bend his head down and placed it on my shoulder his cool lips pressed on my neck as he inhaled my scent.

Edward locked his arms around me pulling me closer to him. He lifted his head and I looked up at him.

Conflicted emotions where swimming in his beautiful butterscotch pools. He kissed my forehead lovingly.

"Edward you have to trust me. You have to let go of your paranoia. I know you are scared but you can't keep me hostage just so nothing will happen to me."

I looked intensely into his eyes as his grip on me tightened.

"I know ever since the whole James debacle you are more worried then before and yes I understand. Thinking about it it's hilarious how easily I could get killed not only me but every human. Car accident, shot by someone, illness and so on. And the supernatural aspect of my life doesn't make my chances at staying alive any better."

"See at least you understand some of my worries." Edward smiled sadly at me.

"But I refuse to live my life in fear of the "what if's"! I am here with you and I will do what ever I can to stay by your side. You can't stop life from happening Edward."

He sighed frustrated and defeated.

"I know what happened with James had been horrible for you but I survived. I am here he is not. Do you really want to spend the time we have together worrying?"

Edward pulled me closer to him again he sighed and put his chin on my head.

"No, I don't and I also don't want to take away your freedom but I will be always worried about you no matter what."

I pulled back from him to be able to tell him this face to face.

"I know but don't let your worry rule you and interfere with our life. Life is hard and sometimes you're going to want to crawl up in a corner and hide there forever. Or in your case you want to keep me in a safety bubble so I'm going to be safe and sound but it doesn't work that way."

I sighed and told him how I felt the last few days as he was stepping over to controlling me.

"Edward your attempts to keep me safe are suffocating me. You know I hate it to be controlled."

After mulling this over he smiled sadly but also with a hint of amusement and apology.

"I have been hard to stand the last few days haven't I?"

"Can't argue with that but I still love you we all do. It's good to see that you are capable of seeing your mistakes."

"Not an easy thing to do sometimes. I'll try."

"That's all I'm asking for." I smiled at him.

Edward placed a sweet kiss on my lips while he scooped me up in his arms and rested me on my bed placing himself next to me.

"Good night my love." Were the last words I heard before I drifted off to slumber.

Edward's POV:

After the attack form James I was back to my old ways and the old Edward was ruling me. I was anxious the whole time.

I was controlling, watching her every move and I knew that she didn't like that. I could see it in her eyes.

It's so strange humans die so easily but also they live so long on this planet already. Are humans really an easy kill?

If they are why isn't their kind eliminated? Compared to a Vampire a human is glass doll. A human can easily be broken by my kind.

But no matter how evident it is to me my love has her own way of seeing things. I'm trying to keep her save but I only drive her away with it.

My attempts of keeping her save make her angry at me. Is all I can do, only hope that she will be alright?

I would love to lock her up in a room and make sure that none and nothing could ever hurt her but with that I would be the one hurting her.

Before her I wouldn't have seen it that way but I do now. My angle is beautiful and part of her beauty is her freedom.

Parts of her would cease to be if I would lock her up in a golden cage.

Looking at her sleeping form in my arms. Hearing her melodic heart beat and feeling the rise and fall of her chest I know what I have to do.

It's not easy in fact it's the hardest thing I have ever done but I need to give her space. She did handle James and she came back from the Wolfs without injuries.

I have to accept my own limits. Not everything goes my way. My love is right I can't let my fear stand in the way of our lives.

I have to take the steps slowly for her sake, for my sake, for our sake.

I was watching her sleeping form taking in every single of her features, stroking her hair and kissing her forehead, her nose and her lips.

She is my strength, my confidence, my rock. Her cheerfulness, her smile, her stubbornness, her bravery. She is the guiding light in my dark moments. Whenever I lose myself she brings me back.

For her I have to be better.

Anna's POV:

I woke up in the morning without my life size teddy bear. I looked to my nightstand and found his note.

Good morning love,

I'm deeply sorry that I can't be with you this lovely morning but I will be waiting for you when you are ready to go to school.

With all my love, always yours,

Edward

I got out of bed did my routine and was ready for school. Edward's silver Volvo was already waiting outside as I stepped out of the house.

Edward was in front of me in a sec, kissed the tip of my nose and gave me one of his crooked smiles before he put his hand on the small of my back and led me to the car.

Just as we reached it another car arrived and I saw Kevin sit in it. He got out of the car saw Edward and me and grumpily went to the house not noticing us any further.

"Headache much?" Edward chuckled and nodded.

"You know I was surprised to find that I hadn't had any babysitters this morning." I told him as we where on our way to school.

Ever since James Edward wouldn't leave my side or one of his family members had to watch me every second.

My Vampire looked guilty.

"I know I overdid it."

"Yes, you did Edward."

"I'm sorry I will improve myself but please understand that some times I can't help but to worry about you."

He looked at me pleading with his eyes for me to understand.

"Edward I understand that fear that you have, I really do. When you were waiting for James and his coven to arrive I also worried about you even though I knew that you would be fine. It's natural to worry about the ones you love but you can't let that worry stand in your way because it will destroy everything. You don't want to become a creepy guy who imprisons his girlfriend in a golden cage to keep her safe from the world taking away all the rights and decisions and thinks on the top of that that he has done something right?"

My Vampire looked at me curiously and asked innocently.

"Don't you think you are being a little bit too hard?"

"Edward!" I said in a warning voice glaring at him and crossing my arms over my chest.

He chuckled and put his hand on my knee squeezing it gently.

"Don't worry love I got it. Alice saw our little talk yesterday and ordered me home so the whole family could ambush me. I'll be good."

"You listened to what your family members told you?" I asked astonished. He sighed.

"It is about time I stop being an obstreperous and unruly child, don't you think?" Edward smiled weakly at me.

"Seems like there is hope for you after all."

"Thanks to you." He whispered as a breathtaking smile broke out on his face.

He took my hand in his and brought it to his lips placing a kiss on the back of my hand. At school, in the parking lot Rosalie, Emmett, Jasper and Alice waited for us.

"Morning." Alice squealed as she pulled me into a hug which I returned.

"So little sis how where the wolfs?" Emmett asked curious. Edward shot him a glare.

"I'll tell you later. I met up with the council elder I guess Carlisle will want to hear it as well."

"Yes, he quite interested in the happenings of the last night." Jasper stated amused.

After school we made our way to the Cullen's place. We were greeted warmly by Esme as always when we came back from school. She is just such a mom.

Taking our places at the table in the dinning room I told them what had occurred in La Push. As I assumed Emmett found it awesome that I kicked the butt of the two Werewolves though he was also pouting a little that he isn't allowed to have some fun with them.

Rose was proud that her upgrade on my stun gun worked so well and smug about having taken a part in the Werewolves-have-gotten-their-butt-kicked-thing.

Esme was worried at first but in the end happy that I was fine. Carlisle was thoughtful and Jasper and Alice just disgusted by the Wolfs.

And there was my Edward his face was unreadable what meant that he was seriously pissed. His jaw was clenched and his whole body tense.

We all looked at him and waited for him to explode. Emmett and Jasper were getting ready to restrain him if needed.

"Love do you remember how you told me that when ever you are angry or something is bothering you, you just need to get it out of your system by getting on your bike and ride till it's over?"

O.K. that was not what everybody was expecting. I just looked incredulous and nodded.

"I think I need to go for a run before I leap over the treaty line and snap their necks." He smiled at me strained.

"Have a nice run?!?" I smiled unsure at him.

He gave me one of his crooked smiles, kissed my forehead and was off. Jasper and Emmett hot on his heels.

I just looked at the empty space where he was just a moment ago.

"It's going to be fine he really only went for a run and when he will be back he is going to be totally fine." Alice chirped.

"Really?" Esme, Carlisle, Rose and I asked in union.

"Yes." She grinned at us as she hopped from her chair, standing in front of me in an instant.

"And now it's time for a make-over!" Alice sang happily as she dragged me into her room.

Alice tried out new make-up on me and a few new hair styles. I like it to be her Barbie Doll. At some point Rose also came in Alice bedroom and we chatted about random stuff.

After nearly two hours Edward was back I met him at the staircase as he was coming up to his room.

He smiled a crooked smiled at me before he suddenly stood before me cupping my cheek.

"You look beautiful love."

"Thanks to Alice." He frowned at that.

Scooping me up in his arms he took off at Vampire speed and I found myself on his bed in his room, in his arms.

He touched my forehead with his and sighed contently.

"Everything O.K.?"

"Yes, it will be but please promise me no more Werewolves if you can avoid it." He looked begging at me.

"I think I can arrange that." I laughed.

"Thank you." He kissed my forehead again before he sighed.

"Sometimes it's really hard to be mature."

"None said it's easy Edward."

"No, none did." He said as a wicked glimmer sparkled in his eyes.

I knew what was coming but it was too late he had his hands already on my waist and tickled me mercilessly.

As he finally showed mercy I was completely breathless and my face was burning. Finally being able to breath again Edward captured my lips with his and we shared a long passionate kiss.

Pulling back Edward reached for my hand and twined our finger together meanwhile looking intensely into my eyes.

"I've been thinking…"

"Yes, you tend to do that a lot." I laughed.

"I'm being serious here." Edward pouted adorably at me.

I held my breath to stop form laughing. "O.K. you have been thinking….." I repeated soberly.

"Maybe it was all faith. Destiny."

"What do you mean?" I was confused I didn't know what he was referring to.

"I mean us."

I only looked at him curious.

"This Stephenie Meyer writing the books. You reading them and then coming here. What if that's how it was meant to be from the very beginning?"

"Quite intricately don't you think?"

"You don't believe in destiny?" He asked raising an eye brow at me.

"Better question is since when do you believe in it?"

"Ever since I met you." I smiled at that respond.

"I don't know if there is something like destiny or not and if I believe in it guess it's depended on my mood but one thing is for sure. Whatever it was that led me into your arms I'm thankful for it."

"I love you my Anna." His butterscotch eyes sparkled like little stars as they were gazing at me.

"I love you too." I said before I pressed my lips on his.