Chapter 14

When I arrived at the classroom, Ma'am was already discussing the lesson. Thankfully, she wasn't as strict as other teachers. I quietly went to my seat and listened. For some reason, my eyes seemed to have a mind of their own, immediately searching for Keivan. I was stunned when our gazes met. Oh my gosh, he was looking at me...

And what was this I could see in his eyes? Why did he look sad? Was something wrong? He kept staring at me, and I couldn't figure out what he wanted—did he want me to melt under his gaze? I decided to look away; I was losing this staring match.

But why? Why was he looking at me? Am I supposed to start hoping again? Ugh, I don't want to assume anything anymore—it's so frustrating when I get my hopes up again. But it's Keivan; he still has this strong pull on my heart.

I tried not to look at him anymore, afraid I'd read too much into it and set myself up for disappointment again. Instead, I focused on the discussion. I really tried, but it was no use—he wouldn't leave my mind until the bell rang for lunch. As my classmates left, I watched Keivan walk out of the room until he was out of sight.

"Wow, girl... If your eyes had lasers, Keivan would have melted by now. You're still head over heels, aren't you? Come on, moving on is the trend now," Kath teased.

"Huh? No, I wasn't looking at him," I denied while packing my things.

"Yeah, right. Don't lie, you got caught red-handed," Kath continued to tease.

"Okay, fine… Just let me be. All I have now are these stolen glances," I said, feeling a bit down.

"You're still so hung up on him… Alright, fine, I'll let you be until you finally wake up," she said.

I stayed silent to avoid dragging out the conversation, and we headed to the canteen for lunch. But today, I had to eat alone; Kath is part of the agriculture club—despite her playful nature, she's really into gardening and environmental stuff. They had a meeting, so she couldn't join me for lunch.

So here I was, eating alone. After finishing my meal, I went to our department's rooftop to get some fresh air. This is where Kath and I usually hang out after lunch since it's quiet and no one else seems to like this spot.

When I got there, I saw a familiar figure, a guy standing near the railings, looking down at the building below. Even from behind, I knew it was him—I've memorized every inch of his back from all the times I've stared at him.

I hesitated, wondering if I should stay or leave. I finally decided to leave; we had nothing to talk about anyway. But just as I turned to go, he looked in my direction. I froze, unable to move. The wind blew, ruffling his hair, and he still looked like the most handsome guy to me, even after all the pain he caused.

"Laine…" he softly called my name, snapping me out of my daze.

"Oh, hi... I—uh, didn't know you were here... S—sorry, I'll just g—" I stuttered, but he cut me off.

"Laine, can I talk to you?" he said, and I could feel the sadness in his voice. My feet moved on their own, and before I knew it, I was standing beside him.

"W—what do you want to say?" I asked nervously. The wind continued to blow, almost trying to take my hair with it. He looked down, seeming unsure of how to start.

"I'm sorry for what I did last time," he said, still looking down.

"For what?" I asked. He had done so many things that hurt me; I wasn't sure which one he was referring to.

"For insulting you and your boyfriend," he said softly, but just loud enough for me to hear.

"It's still annoying, to be honest," I said, looking off into the distance.

"That's why I'm apologizing... I'm sorry. I was just insecure," he admitted, sounding embarrassed. I couldn't understand—why would he feel insecure?

"Insecure? What's there for you to be insecure about?" I asked, still confused.

"I was jealous because you were happy with your new boyfriend, while here I am, with Angela wanting to keep our relationship a secret. Now she's asked for a break because she's tired of me... It hurts, Laine… a lot. Now I know how it feels," he said, and I was stunned. That's why he lashed out at me before—it was his pride and jealousy talking, thinking I was happy. But he didn't know that I was still hurting, still in love with this jerk.

"It really hurts, Laine. I feel broken into pieces," he said, starting to sob. Seeing the person you love crying over someone else is excruciating. I wasn't sure if my pain was worse than his, but I was foolish enough to want to make him happy now.

I wanted to comfort him, even if it hurt me, just to see him smile. I didn't know what to say, so I did the only thing I could—I hugged him. I just wanted to ease his pain, even if only for a moment.

"I'm sorry you're feeling this way… but I'm here for you," I said, holding him close. Call me a martyr, but I would willingly suffer just to make him feel better. I ignored all the pain he had caused me because he needed me now.

"I don't know if she'll ever come back to me… Maybe this is my karma… for hurting you, Laine… it's all my fault."

"Shhh… don't blame yourself," I said, hugging him tighter as he cried. I missed Keivan so much—I wanted to savor this moment, to feel him close to me again, so I closed my eyes. But as soon as I did, I saw Alzid's teasing smile flash in my mind, surprising me, so I let go of Keivan.

"Uh, sorry," Keivan apologized.

"Nope, it's okay… I can be your crying shoulder… anytime," I said, forcing a smile. I know I'm being foolish, but I can't help hoping that maybe, just maybe, Keivan will see my worth someday and realize that I'm here for him, no matter what.