Chapter 85: Broken Cognition
In the end, I wound up choosing [Luck] and [Knight Physique]. I haven't felt any tangible changes as of yet, but I might be able to do so later on.
The former should be something related to [Destiny], more so, [Fate]. It is the intangible luck that could redirect me to a good outcome. It should be akin to Suimei's fate which I overheard from Lord Nettesheim.
Meanwhile, the latter is something from Galahad. I haven't heard much from him, but I could infer several things from the body I used on the ninth iteration.
For once, his body is attuned to high levels of physical strength. There is also a strange connection to mysteries that enabled me to perform the sword technique and the highest-level grand magicka properly.
Even with that, I could still utilize technology. Proof of that was Miku's aid in casting the final grand magicka near the end.
In the first place, I am not considered as a 'being of mysteries' as much as Suimei is. It gives magicians insane firepower when it comes to spells. It is one of the primary reasons why I am limited to using technology to make up for it.
With that transformation, I would be able to utilize both magicka, technology, and swordsmanship to another height.
I saw the view from the peak once.
I longed to possess power comparable to Galahad—to me on the ninth iteration.
It was something I only saw on the sidelines, something close yet distant. I had seen Satoru-san and Suimei pull off unbelievable feats one after another.
I admit.
I yearn for it.
"You're spacing a lot. I will bring you to your room."
"...Alright."
Just then, my sight throbbed slightly. I felt lightheaded as I lost control over my body.
"..on..?!"
It's bad…
Thud-!
My body uncontrollably fell to the ground. My lungs started desperately heaving for air. My chest tightened.
This is… Kazamitsu-san… revival.
"Mn…"
Soon, everything turned black.
*****
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*
In a distant world made of facades, a knight spaced out.
"Galahad!"
"Mn..?"
"Are you spacing out again?"
"..."
Galahad looked at the youngest addition to the Round Table. The girl cut her hair short to remove a hindrance during battles. Her knighthood is bestowed by none other than Sir Lancelot.
As his son, Gareth's attention to Galahad came off as no surprise.
"It's nothing." He spoke. "What are you saying?"
"You aren't listening at all… I asked you about that journey!"
"The search for the Holy Grail? Indeed, I have been chosen for it."
Britain's current situation is far from ideal.
Mysteries from the world began to recede a few hundred years ago—from the moment the King of Magecraft, Solomon, died. The disappearance of True Ether removed its everlasting glory.
Camelot remains unaffected due to a certain court mage. The sewer systems, agriculture rotations, clean water systems, and so on. True Ether is added on top of that, turning Camelot into the most ideal city.
However, the same couldn't be said outside it.
Britain recently went to war with the Roman Emperor, Lucius Tiberius. The Knights of the Round Table held their reputation as high-level powers. In the end, King Arthur reigned victorious with his Excalibur.
Even so, that only settled a part of their problems, hence leading to the journey to claim the Holy Grail.
In this time and age, it is the sole miracle that could turn everything around. More than half of the Round Table's knights are assigned to undertake this mission.
"His Highness included me among the ones participating." He paused as if realizing something. "Are you perhaps regretful you aren't chosen?"
"You're still the same as always! Teasing with that straight face!"
"..."
Galahad silently looked at her. It made it hard for Gareth to know what he was honestly thinking.
The two 'bantered' for quite some time before he was left alone.
"What was that?"
Galahad felt something strange. It's as if he forgot about something important—like he already lived this life once.
"Strange…"
…
"Mn… You're alright?"
"...Yes."
Galahad received Percival's inquiring look. He is used to his "brother" asking about his condition whenever he doesn't feel right. He was the first one to notice his complex relationship with his father, Lancelot.
"I'm fine. I simply thought of something."
"Something taking your mind? I wonder what it is."
"..."
As usual, Galahad replied with silence.
"If it is something related to women, I hope you won't follow your father's… path."
"..."
Galahad's face went stiff upon hearing that. He wondered how their conversation even went in that direction.
"Infidelity is bad."
"...Say it to Sir Tristan… or even father."
The majority of the Round Table's Knights are womanizers.
That is a well-established fact within their inner circle.
"Oh? It seems you are growing a sense of humor. That's good, that's good."
"..?"
Galahad felt like he understood his words yet he didn't.
…
"This sword…"
The three knights, Percival, Galahad, and Bors, was sidetracked on their quest to find the Holy Grail. Percival's sister led them to an ancient ship which contained many historical records and relics from the time of King Solomon. Along with it is a map to an island which housed several relics.
In the end, they decided to undertake the journey purely because of Solomon's name.
If there is someone close to God, it would only be him.
He is their clue to acquire the Holy Grail.
However, what they didn't expect was to find a longsword instead.
"...Can I touch it?"
Surprised by Galahad's proactiveness, Percival and Bors couldn't react for a while.
"It's fine." The former said. "Perhaps it is fated to be with your hands."
"Yes. It's the first time you wanted something."
Being nearly the same age as him, Bors saw his peculiarity. He never wanted to have something for himself. He always fought for the others' cause. Such selflessnes is something he admired.
Galahad didn't know how to react. After a while, he nodded to them and grasped the sheathed longsword.
The two flags hung on its guard fluttered as he drew it out. At that moment, an aura of sanctimony surrounded the stone room.
"..!"
Suddenly, a strange set of memories entered his mind. Using a certain swordsmanship, he cut a black dragon's wing before its shrieks of pain resounded to his ears.
"Again…"
…
Amidst the broken rubbles of stone lies an unaffected room. It formed a natural barrier that pushed back everything save for the chosen ones.
"Are you alright..?"
"It's just a scratch."
"..."
Galahad wore a stoic face that said "Are you really saying that?" as he pulled him back up.
Percival looks beat-up and tattered due to the battle against the castle's usurper, Klingsor. His strange magecraft and Holy Spear Longinus were enough to cause him trouble.
However, it was the latter that settled everything. Longinus acknowledged him as its rightful user. It was then used to defeat the evil magus.
"We did it!"
Bors came to them with a bright smile.
"It was very long… but to think we would find it..!"
After many twists and turns, they discovered the legendary holy grail. It was housed in the Corbenic Castle under the safekeeping of the Fisher King. Only when Klingsor forcefully seized the castle did it change owners.
Nevertheless, the grail refused to acknowledge a vile man such as him. With that, it was left untouched for decades.
"..."
As usual, Galahad wore his expressionless face.
"I wonder when I'd see an expressive Galahad…"
"That sounds good." Percival replied. "We shall celebrate when it happens."
"...We will see."
The two laughed at his stiff reply. They had been together for nearly two years in search of the grail. It was a common sight to poke fun at him—which Galahad doesn't mind.
They entered the grail room.
Just as Bors continued to walk towards it, he was met with a sudden hindrance.
"Ah?!"
It was an invisible wall. It didn't have any form of aura. It was nothing, yet it could affect reality like that.
"...So that's how it is."
Percival understood everything. This invisible wall thwarted Klingsor's attempts to utilize the Holy Grail.
Even though it is a few steps away from them, it suddenly felt distant.
"Galahad?"
Bors was shocked to see Galahad walk towards it. He was about to stop him when he saw how he passed through it easily. With normal strides, he came closer to the grail.
When they could finally react, all they saw was his back facing them. They didn't see his dazed look.
The moment Galahad touched the grail—
Hum-!
—a path to heaven was pierced through.
In this brief moment, time became exceedingly still to him. Images of humanoid figures shifting to an incomprehensible being with countless eyes appeared on his sight.
Galahad was confused at this moment. He didn't know what was happening right now.
'What…'
The last thing he could remember was approaching the grail. Somehow, he felt like he could do it; and so he did.
Just then, a vision… no, a message descended upon him. It didn't involve any voices, texts, and the like. It is something that transcends language itself. It belonged to something far more complex than it.
He showed a surprised look. He tried to process everything—in resignation, that is. He understood the nature and implications behind the miraculous Holy Grail.
'It was destined to be a failure.'
Their journey to the Holy Grail was nothing but for naught. Even if the heavens won't take back the grail, the overseeing counterforces would correct everything and lead to Camelot's downfall.
It is necessary for history to progress. Camelot is destined to be the brightest legend that would inspire kingdoms and empires of the future.
As such, their downfall is destined from the beginning.
'Your Royal Highness… I failed you.'
When the pathway to heaven closed, the Holy Grail and Galahad were nowhere to be found.
…
What… did just..?
Gareth, Percival… Father…
Tou-san… Seiji… Artemis…
Huge chunks of memories entered my mind. They disrupted my experiences and tried to enter through the gaps. In turn, it blurred my perception—my sense of self.
Am I Galahad?
Am I Akasaka Nobu?
What are our differences?
What is happening?
What just happened?
…
Who am I..?
In the midst of this dilemma, I found myself standing on an execution ground.
There, I saw two figures fighting. One of them is the knight… Gareth?
The other knight sported short purple hair and bloodshot eyes.
Pssshk-!
I witnessed him crush the defenseless Gareth. She didn't wear any armor nor her usual gun lance. Just like that, her lifeless body fell to the… ground.
…
Huh?
Before I could react, I was transferred to another place. This time, it was the same man fighting against a familiar knight…
Sir Gawain.
Clang-!
I understood everything.
Clang-!
That… he… my father killed Gareth.
Gareth!
That fucking bastard..!
No, he's still my father…
Chaotic thoughts began entering my head. Perhaps it is due to the dissociation I was feeling, I let out many curses.
Before long, my mind entered a state of stillness. The chaotic thoughts receded just before I saw Gawain leaving the battered Lancelot behind.
Since then, I kept staring blankly at the scenes I saw. Maybe I was too overwhelmed to be able to react to them.
I felt… nothing.
Crack.
I am aware of how absurd this is.
Crack.
It is inhuman.
Crack.
Why… am I like this?
"It's not right."
"It is."
I turned my back and saw Galahad. He is completely identical to my appearance.
"You are extremely confused."
Nobu couldn't believe what was happening to him.
"Even with two hundred years of memories..?"
"It is different."
A lifetime's worth of memories is far different from the incomplete memories the cheat gives. The influence it brings is bigger than snippets of memories.
Moreover…
Akasaka Nobu is someone considered to be a normal human. Although he experienced numerous traumatic events with his cheat, he retained his 'normal' self. In a sense, Nobu is an anomaly amongst all magicians who lose their previous selves.
Meanwhile, Galahad is a special human. He is someone who does not hesitate to help others, even at the expense of himself. Thus, he is dubbed the 'perfect knight'.
Both of them lived contrasting lives with different experiences. Galahad's mindset, in particular, is as inhuman as it could get. It became problematic once it mixed with Nobu.
Putting two separate worldviews could potentially cause what he experienced just now—a cognition collapse.
"We are fortunate to have this moment. There is still a chance to correct this."
Galahad spoke with a stoic face.
Strangely, Nobu also calmed down at this moment.
"You will forget most of it until you are ready."
"I see." I understood everything from his words. "That move caused this…"
I am pertaining to meddling with the ninth iteration. It was a sudden decision at that time, but only now do I feel its aftereffects.
"Most of it… I presume I would still remember bits of it?"
"Yes. It wouldn't affect you like it did now, however."
Their ends… I would forget about it.
Gareth, Sir Percival…
Her Highness.
I met Galahad's complicated gaze.
"When the time comes… let us meet them again."
"...Alright."
I bid my farewell to the knight.
*****
"Mn…"
I got out of a blurry dream. My body felt light yet unfamiliar. When I opened my eyes, I was greeted by a dim ceiling. The rays of moonlight cascaded over the gaps of the curtain.
My senses started returning. The status of a level five allowed me to perceive many things clearly—it is way sharper compared to before.
One such example is a steady pattern of breathing on my side. I looked at it and saw a brown-haired girl sleeping beside the bed.
'Lili..?'
Something's strange about her. It feels like… dream organs?
Lili could finally use [Mana Furnace]?
As if sensing my gaze, her body shook before her head rose. She looked back at me with a sleepy look, but it disappeared a few seconds later.
"Teacher! You're finally awake!"
*****
A/N: Welp. It is our midterms week which is why updates this time became even slower. Nevertheless, I will try to upload another chapter within 2-3 days. It'll be our semester break after that, so do expect more often updates due to that.
PS: Got Jingliu and her signature light cone in this update. I lost the 75/25 of the light cone but I pulled another ten pull and got a back-to-back instead. I got too interested with her story (as well as Xianzhou in general). If I would ever write Honkai Star Rail in this fic, it'll most likely be on Xianzhou. I am reading the lore materials as of the moment and have to give Mihoyo yet another one for their worldbuilding. The dynamics of Aeons fit right with Nobu's growing power in the advance chapters, too. Oops, a small spoiler.
Anyways, happy reading~!