Brewing Trouble

Kobi pulled apart his lips- he would've succeeded in fooling an idiot to think he was smiling if not for the fact his teeth kept grinding against themselves. 'I WANNA MURDER SOMEONE!'

"You just murdered your brother." Shik scoffed.

'O, I forgot! ...WAIT! THAT DOESN'T MATTER, THAT DIRTY FART COULDN'T BE MINE– ahem," Kobi paused and collected his bearing before shouting again at Shik, 'THE HEAVEN FART'S BROTHER!'

Shik almost vomited. Heaven Fart? Literally Heaven Fart? Fuck! this Host is... just what could he say?

"Ahem! Yo, my fiance!" Kobi nodded his head solemnly seeing Reka's speechless face." Nice to meet you again! So I summoned your Grandpa's spirit and he told me he would keep farting non-stop until I ran away with you tucked under my armpit!"

"The shit?" Reka could swear she had been cursing more than she ever had in her whole freaking life.

"O, Son of Saint! You're back! You're back!!! Ho-How magnimious of you! I know, I know the holy spirits must've told you! So you learned of our plight and couldn't stop yourself from interfering! I-I can't ever repay you, Son of Saint!!" A villager suddenly charged over and placed his hand over Kobi's shoulder.

In normal cases, Kobi would've slapped him off, but, his face– twisted from fright and worry and his throat parched to the point his words stammered. As he shook Kobi's shoulder, his trembling eyes gazed at Kobi as God's aid had arrived– all led Kobi to nod silently.

He patted the man on the shoulder, recognizing him the first villager who reached out to him, and spoke firmly, "It's alright now, Mib, leave it to me!"

Mib's eyes widened slightly, "Son of Saint, y-you... remember my nam– No! Mo–Most gracious! I am most grateful! O, Divine Saint!" Mib's eyes welled up and in an attempt to hide them, he hurled his face in Kobi's feet.

But before he could land, Kobi reached out to him in fright and held him back up, "Oi, oi! Don't you freaking dare do that," Puffing out his chest in arrogance, he declared, "My sacred Holy Knight Path will end up corrupted."

Mib's face turned pale from fright as he shot back and bowed, "I-I sincerely beg your pardon!" The latter's secretly trembling eyes sneaked at Kobi, 'H-Holy Knight Path? My God!'

Kobi patted Mib's shoulder and lifted him up and glanced at the villagers- at Reka in particular.

"It'a alright now!" Kobi walked next to Reka and placed his hand over her shoulder before saying to the crowd, "You people go rest up, we two will handle everything!"

"N-No!" Mib hurriedly dashed towards them, giving no time for Reka to open her mouth.

"I-I wish to accompany you! Please! If I won't be too much of a burden!" Mib clasped his hands- trembling right from their roots.

"Yes! I would like to come as well! If anything, we can be meat-shields for you!" The villagers nodded one by on and stepped forward.

Kobi seriously gazed at them all before sighing, "Alright! But no meat shields! All of us are going together and returning together! And... James, you return! If even against all expectations some danger does appear, you better don't risk your life out there." Kobi glanced at a boy- right around his own age, he was younger than the other men here, but just as sturdy.

He stepped forward with a grave frown, but Kobi shut his protest right in his mouth, "Your life isn't yours alone... it belongs to your old mother as well. Who will look after her if you happen to lose an arm or two? Huh?"

"I– I..." James looked around helplessly, before suddenly his eyes widened in confusion. How did Kobi remember his name? He... He was the relative of a Saint, no? Why would he bother remembering a useless person like him?

James gulped... a thought unprecedented like any ever emerged in his mind: Did he remember every last villager by the name?

James took a deep breath and solemnly gazed at Mib, "But I have to repay Uncle Mib's kindness, he– he helped me and my mom a lot after father passed away."

Mib's eyes suddenly widened, he stepped back towards him and patted his shoulder, "Boy, I consider you my own son! Your father used to help me out as well, I just– return, don't mention things like these again if you really consider me your uncle!"

James bit his lips, "Thank you, Uncle!"

Mib smiled and patted him on the head.

Giving Mib a tight hug, James spoke solemnly, "I wish you find Uros safe and healthy."

"Yea! Thank you son!" Mib nodded and patted him as he walked off. His head hanging low.

'Hmm... so did his son go missing? I remember he and James didn't hit it off as much. Mib helped James family in the past and Uros thought that James was just leeching off of them. Hence he always came to bully him, but there was nothing too excessive as Mib used to scold him for it rather harshly.' Kobi rubbed his chin.

"Go grab some pickaxes or whatever you have, meet me and Reka at the village's periphery." Kobi dismissed the Villagers and dragged Reka with him.

His hand still rested on her shoulder, "So what happened, maid girl Reka?"

Reka's lips twitched. So he finally remembered she existed?

"First tell me what's up with you? Why do you keep returning from the forest?" Reka's eyes glittered as she gazed at him. Could it be there was some dragon out there and he couldn't pass by it? Will he stay in the village forever?

"As I told you, your grandpa said my fart was too good, almost enough to send him to heaven from hell. He said he wanted me to impart it onto you!" Kobi nodded solemnly.

"...Alright, cutting your crap, when you first returned, I was about to start my duty when a commotion drew my attention, when I reached, I found Mib scolding his son due to hitting James. He was harsher than usual, but Uros's bullying had escalated today as well.

"Uros retorted back and dashed away, I wanted to chase after him but Mib told me not too.

"Story cut short, I went to my duty, the villagers back to their's. When I returned, I went to Mib's house to look for Uros but his mother told me he didn't come back yet. She told me not to worry and that he would return eventually.

"Mib also told me the same thing and presented me some fruit, as I was munching on them, a villager came by and told Mib that Uros had ran away into the outside of the village's periphery, aka where I guard about 16/7, and you know the danger there, if stray monsters appear, like the Silver Wolf, you know... what might happen."

Kobi frowned, "You were munching fruit? Tch! You glutton!"

Reka's lips spasmed, "Is this the first thing you have to say?"

"Ahem! So why did that villager not tell Mib earlier where Uros ran off to?"

"Apparently his 8 your old son saw Uros, and he heard him chatting about it with his friends. I asked Rio, he also affirmed it."

"Hmm! Divl saw him, yea?" Kobi nodded, that kid was honest. He was also the one to have spilled his secret... to God, no less. Ahem!

"Umm... yep!" Reka glanced at him... How did he know?

"Hmm!" Kobi waited for the villagers while gazing into the plain.

The grass slowly grew larger with the distance with the wind ruffling it gently, Kobi's nose twitched, his eyes darkening slightly, 'This scent... how cruel.' Kobi sighed.

"Where's Rio?"

"Huhh?" Reka glanced at his eeriely serene face, "H-He's playing."

"Go to him."

"Huh? What do you mea–"

"Leave, I can handle things here!"

"Wha–"

"I mean to say, go away!" Kobi waved his hand in boredom.

Reka frowned, "The heck are you blabbering on?"

Kobi shifted his eyes from the ever-enchanting plain and peered into her eyes, "Have you seen a mauled human?"

Reka's eyes widened slightly, her heart stirred as she replied in honesty, "No."

"Hmm! Life is full of surprising tastes, no? Sometimes sour, sometimes sweet... and sometimes metallic!" Kobi burst into laughter, "Leave... this is not for you to handle."

"Umm... should we head off now?" A voice drifted over from the back as loud steps drew his attention.

"OI!" Kobi yelped and jumped forward, glancing back at the group of eager villagers, he couldn't help but blurt out, "When did you guys come?"

"Aw, just now!" The villagers replied honestly.

"Hmm! Good! Lets gooo!" Kobi raised his fist, giving a shout of encouragement and strode forward.

"Aye!" The villagers nodded in enthusiasm and walked along.

Reka's hand charged like lightening and pinched Kobi's ear.

"Ow! Ow! What are you doing?"

"I'm going to be in control, Mister Relative of Saint!" Reka snickered disdainfully and took the lead.

The villagers gulped... would the Saint be angry?

Kobi scratched his head awkwardly and shrugged, "As you say ma'am!"

The villagers eased up and laughed, getting comfy with Kobi.

"Lets go!" Reka drew out her sword, her eyes shivering fearfully.

"Aye!" Kobi flashed a grin and bolted next to her. "Charge men!"

"LETS GOO!" The men pumped themselves and strode with large strides.

Kobi's eyes flickered, his unmoving grin somewhat... dead, 'Yes, lets go retrieve the corpse.'