Don't bite my Soft Fluffy ass
"Yo Wakaba" I greet her and she just looks at me blankly before waving back slightly and then sitting down. Yeah, she doesn't have the most...how do I say...She is basically boring as fuck and doesn't show much if any emotions whatsoever to literally anyone.
But she is one of the few girls who doesn't swarm Shinobu when he comes in so she gets a plus in my book at least, even if the rest of class thinks she's kinda weird...and I mean their not wrong but it's not like some gross creepy type like Spooky...she is just straight up a fucking vampire and no one does shit about it.
Like everyone knows, she is a bloodsucker, and yet they all ignore it for some reason. But not me tho, I got contingency plans in case she goes rouge, my bag always has at least one stake and a silver cross inside at all times.
And if those don't work, then I can rely on my HUGE FUCKING PECKS to just block her bite or claws. Basically, She ain't gon catch me lacking, that's for damn sure.
"Alright class, quiet down." our teacher says as she comes in, and Shinobu's fangirls all calm down and spread out to their assigned seats as our teacher walks up to the board.
Because I have shit grades,(His grades are shit, he was lying before)I was going to pay attention but I found my eyelids getting heavy so instead of doing that, I just laid my head down on the table as she started to call for role.
Teacher: "Is Shinob-
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM*
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'huh?' I wake up and I'm not in the classroom anymore, I'm actually surrounded on all sides by some sort of black shell, I can move but it's very limited. Was I kidnapped? How? Of all the kids in that class and they chose me? Nah, that doesn't make much sense, if anything they probably got everyone while I was napping.
But I didn't even remember when I fell asleep tho, I just laid my head on the desk and closed my eyes, and then I woke up here? That's strange, especially because I'm a light sleeper so I would have noticed something was up. Hmm, maybe they used sleeping gas or something.
*Sigh*
Fuck my life.
*Crack*
'The hell?' this dark and cramped space was suddenly illuminated by a small crack that let a bit of low-intensity blue light in. So I guess I'm in some warehouse I guess, maybe I'm locked inside a chest or something, or a box. And if that's so then my classmates must be in different boxes, Hold on, are they gonna sell us? Or cut us up and sell out organs? What the fuck is going on?
I was a normal fucking kid, I can't handle all this random bullshit, not that my folks would even care enough to pay, then again they wouldn't be able to if they tried. My own father is a drunkard who doesn't work, and my mom always whores herself out for pocket change, which means. I. Am. Fucked.
*Crack*
Another crack appeared in this box, and I decided that if I'm going to die at least I'm going out my way, for as long as I live, I get a choice. I try to move around and see if I can't make the crack bigger, I found my current situation weirdly comfortable even though I'm balled up, but I do manage to scratch at the crack and increase its size.
*Screech*
Oh, Fuck! That hurts. I had made the crack bigger, but in the process fucked my ears which are strangely more sensitive. Still, not wanting to spell the remainder of my life in this place I start peeling away at my confinement and more and more light gets through and eventually, I make a big enough hole and I'm out.
"Kyuuu~" I fall out of the space and make a weirdly cute noise that shouldn't belong to a 220 pound 16-year-old. Wanting to know what the hell happened I look around and see that I'm am actually not in a warehouse, but in some sort of cave that is being lit up by random glowing rocks.
"Kyuu~(Dafuq)" I tried to say but it came out as that same fucking annoyingly cute voice from before which pisses me off greatly for one of two reasons. I know for a fact, that this place is not normal, why? You Ask? Well because I don't think glowing rocks normally excrete blue particles in the air, which means that I probably am not on earth, and if I am then I just became the richest man on earth with this discovery, but on the off chance I'm not on earth, then I just got the isekai treatment.
But apparently, I got the short end of the stick and was reincarnated as something not even human, I hope at least I'm not some fluffy cute harmless creature, because if I am, then I'm screwed. I continue to look around until I notice a large egg that has the top half broken.
So, I just came out from an egg, which means I am some sort of reptile, so my options are a snake, which is not it because I noticed I have all 4 limbs and even two extra ones shooting out of my back and one from right above my ass, so the only probably answer is some sort of dragon. I look down at my paws and see it's covered with lime-ish green fur? I don't actually know what color that is.
Anyway, I look over the rest of my body and it's covered by mostly Aquamarine blue? Teal? God, I hope it's not teal. It's some sort of mix between green and blue, but anyway it's all covered with fur, so why did I come out of an egg if I am a mammal? No fucking clue, but another world so I guess this place has some weird biology.
(A/N: Mc looks like the cover image)
*Sigh*
This is...I guess slightly better than being kidnapped, in a sense. I'm not going to be sold or anything like that, well yet anyway because fantasy worlds always have dragon hunters, but I'm safe for now tho.
"Kyu~(So then)"
Ugghh, I'm gonna have to get used to that voice arent I?
"Kyuu~ Kyuu~ (So then if I'm in another world don't I have like a status or something?)" I start recalling all my knowledge of isekai, Fan-fictions, and cultivation novels, and all that shit.
"Kyuu~(Status)" Nothing
"Kyu~?(Menu?)" Nada
'Kyuu~!?(Stats?!)" Nente
"Kyuuu~!?!?!?(System!?!?!?)" Nien
"Kyuu! (Goddammit!)" I slam my fluffy foot on the ground in anger and it surprisingly cracks under pressure.
"Kyu! Kyu, Kyu Kyuuu? (If I'm in another world shouldn't I at least have an appraisal skill or something)" I complain out loud which mostly sounds like varying degrees and pitches of Kyuus.
[Numer of skill points currently in Possession: 1,000]
"Kyuu? (The Fuck?)"
[Number of skill points required to attain Skill: Appraisal=100 acquire?]
"Kyu? (Yes?)"
[Confirmed 900 skill points left over]
I see, appraisal is that one OP information skill that allows the MC to see the stats and current condition of pretty much anything right? "Kyuu~! (Good, then I'm not totally screwed)"
I look around the cave to see if I can't find a test subject, and surprise surprise these weird glowing rocks are right in front of me just begging for me to scan them. I walk over to one of them on all 4s, it's really easy, kinda just like second nature to me and once I make it over.
"Kyu~ (Appraisal)"
[Rock]
'....'
"Kyuu Kyuu (Fucking useless piece of shit skill, waste of my points)" I kick the rock and it appears to be very hard indeed...Ouch.
"Kyu Kyu? (Maybe if I use it on myself?)" I look down at my own red paw that's throbbing in pain and use appraisal on myself instead.
[Dragon]
"Kyuu Kyuu (I really am a dragon)"
"Kyu Kyu...Kyuu (That's cool...I guess)"
..
..
..
..
..
..
"KYUUUU! (NO THE FUCK IT'S NOT!)"
"KYUU KYUU KYUUUUUUUU! (I WANT ALL MY HARD WORK BACK YOU PIECE OF SHIT GOD! GIVE ME BACK ALL MY EFFORT AND TIME, GIVE ME BACK MY FRIENDS, YOU CAN KEEP MY PARENTS, BUT GIVE ME BACK MY BEST FRIEND YOU FUCKER!!!)"
"KYU!" I vent all my frustrations with a growl that also comes out in that same fucking voice and try to breathe fire at the same time because I'm a dragon right? I should be able to do that. While trying I feel a warm sensation in my stomach that starts rising through my body until it finally comes out of my mouth.
A torrent of flames comes out of my mouth and splashes against the. wall...Dafuq? Why is it green? Why is it making the wall look like the garden of Eden? Why does it do literally no damage at all?
WHY DO MY FLAMES SPREAD FUCKING FLORAL, AM I A FUCKING GRASS DRAGON, SOME FUCKING HIPPY LIZARD? WHAT THE FUCK AM I? WHERE ARE MY FLAMES OF INCINERATION? OF ANNIHILATION, MY FLAMES THAT CAN MELT STEEL? WHY DO MY FLAMES PLANT FUCKING GRASS AND FLOWERS?
[Breath of Life LV1 has been acquired]
I stop my rant
"Kyuu? (So I am a fucking Eco dragon?)"
"Kyuu (God. Fucking. Dammit)" I sigh to myself while looking at the wall that I just turned into a painting. "Kyuu~ Kyuu~ (At least I should be able to grow some weed)" even though I was never one to try drugs, I'm considering it now, and besides, I'm trying to look on the bright side of this...who am I kidding, there's no bright side to being trapped in a cave as a dragon that literally breaths life instead of fire.
???: "Ribbit"
"Kyuu?(Huh?) I turn trying to see what made that noise only to get a face full of green acid.
"KYUU! (FUCK IT HURTS!)" I start rolling around the ground trying to numb the pain, my vision is impaired so while thrashing around I bump into something, because my vision is still just a blur I have no idea what it is, and just continue to run around until I run into something again headfirst and I hear something fall to the ground.
[Skill Acid resistance LV1 acquired]
My vision starts to clear up and I can now see a green frog getting up and looking at me. Confused I tilt my head until the frog opens its mouth and spits out a green glob at me "Kyu! Kyu! (What the fuck!)" I dodge to the left and the glob lands next to me and starts sizzling.
Dafuq is that?
Acid?
Wait...Acid?!
"Kyu! Kyu! (IM GOING TO FUCKING BITE YOUR HEAD OFF!!!) I scream out charging at the big ol bitch who is going to die within these next few minutes for trying to blind me twice. But first I use appraisal on it.
[Elroe Frog]
'Why do I even bother'
I run at the frog who opens its mouth and spits out another blob at me, I once again dodge to the left and continue forward, once I get right up to it I bring my claws back and attempt to slice its throat, but the frog leaps back and splits out another blob of acid that hits my back.
"K-kyu! (Arggh)" I groan out in pain as the acid eats away at my fur and skin, my ears twitch and I jump back as another blob lands where I just was. Seems like my sense are much better now that I'm a dragon. I back away and slowly move around the frog staring right at it as it just waits there unmovingly for some reason. I growl in an attempt to drive it away but "Kyuu~" Need I say more?
Eventually, the frog gets tired of waiting and opens its mouth to spit at me again, and that's when I rush forward as fast as my little legs could carry me. The frog spits out the green blob and I duck under the blob and get right next to the frog, much to its surprise. I swipe at its face and it somehow jumps over my attack and lands behind me.
"Kyuu! (What the fuck!?) Confused I call out as the little shit had the audacity to bite me in the ass, its slimy gums trying to chew away at my butt and its acid saliva eating away at my fur. I try to turn around and slice its face into 3 but it keeps its mouth attached and I don't have enough range of motion to kill it, so I do the next best thing.
I grab its neck with my tail, as it's surprisingly strong, and lift it up away from my behind. "Kyuu~ Kyuu~ (Hahahahah! Victory!) I cheer as I slowly start to squeeze and strangle this fucking asshole. I was never a sadist in life, but this thing deserves a slow death.
It tries to thrash around, but it's fruitless as I keep a tight grip, its face starts going pale and its blood starts to pour out of its eyes, and then...*Crack* With a sickening crack of its bones I snap its neck and kill it.
I drop the now dead Elore Frog and turn around to face its corpse. "Kyuu~ Kyuu~ Kyuu~ (Yare Yare daze)" I say as I look at the corpse and shake my head in disappointment, and I was about to turn around and leave when my stomach started grumbling.
I look back at the frog as my stomach grows louder.
"Kyuu (Nope)"
I try to walk away but I suddenly felt weak and my stomach growled a lot louder this time as if telling me to suck it up and eat the frog.
"Kyuu Kyu (Im not doing it)"
I once again try to walk away to a tunnel that leads to another part of the cave when suddenly the ground shakes violently and boulders fall from the ceiling and block the entrance.
"...Kyu Kyu? (...Are you fucking serious right now? The world wants me to eat that frog?)" I question and the cave shakes once again as if saying 'Yes'
*Sigh*
"Kyu (Whatever)" I relent and head back to the corpse, I open my mouth and sink my teeth into its skin and almost instantly want to throw it up on the ground. And right as I was about to a stalactite crashed into the floor right next to me.
"K-kyu Kyu (Okay, I get it Damn.)" I suck it up and just continue to eat this disgusting shit against my own will. It takes me a while and I almost regurgitate its meat a couple of times but I'm not tryna die just yet so I force it all down.
After I'm done I use appraisal on the frog remains for no reason other than to get my mind off the taste of that carcass.
[Bones]
...
...
*Sigh*
"Kyu Kyu (I fucking hate this skill)"