Made To Be Ashamed: Chapter 3

-Flint-

After waking up in the infirmary, the memories of meeting my mate crashed in my head. I ripped the IVs from my arms and swung my legs over the side of the hospital bed and tried to stand. My head swam and all I could muster was slumping to the ground with my head in my hands.

What was wrong with me? How could I lose control like some wolf pup? I wanted to punch something, to bang my head into a wall until I could forget about being such an imbecile. There were always stories about inexperienced young wolves finding their mates and entering their rut uncontrollably, but I was 76 years old now. I was the Goddess damned Alpha for 40 years, but I almost went feral just from some omega's scent!

The sound of a throat being cleared notified me to the presence of my son whom had just entered. Without looking up, I let out a long frustrated sigh.

"I know." I drew the word out in an exasperated groan and rubbed at my temples irritatedly.

Conri let out a breathy chuckle. "Well, congratulations at least?" He offered.

I snorted derisively but made no move to get up from my position on the floor. I've never felt more ashamed in my life, and my son would never take me seriously again. The Moon Goddess must have a cruel sense of humor.

"You know, I had to coax your mate from the floor too." He chuckled.

My head snapped up and I grimaced. She must have been so scared, and all because of me. "Did I hurt her?"

Conri reached a hand down and heaved my much larger body to my feet and shook his head. "No. She's just a little spooked."

I sat back on the bed with a heavy sigh and continued to rub my temples to chase away the headache.

"You, on the other hand," he sat beside me and flipped through his clip board, but I paid him no mind. "We had to inject you with 5 times the normal dose of suppressants before you finally settled down."

I couldn't even respond except with another frustrated groan. My stupidity truly knew no bounds. I wasn't some greenhorn pup for Goddess's sake!

"Would you like to see her chart?" My son suggested gently.

I snagged the clipboard from him greedily and quickly ran my eyes through the information.

"Well shit," I muttered as I read, running a hand through my dreadlocks. My mate was ridiculously underweight, and she appeared drugged in the picture. Anger boiled in my stomach. Did those scientists have no conscience? Sure, most of them abandoned the lab when they learned of our pack's interference and the omegas most likely went days without much food, but this level of malnourishment looked like it went on for far longer than that.

"Some are them are much worse off. She must be strong." Conri spoke after some time. I could only nod with a clenched jaw. If I spoke, I knew it would only be more cursing.

Instead, I studied her picture. She was extremely pale, like she'd never seen the light of day, and her long hair and eyebrows were almost white, much different than the dark complexions of my wolf pack. Two pointed years poked through the tangled mess, more cat-like than wolf-like, and it was curious to me that she was half transformed in the picture. It was no glamour shot, and I wasn't sure if she was even conscious based on her droopy lids and parted lips, but my heart still squeezed painfully.

My son must have noticed my defeated posture because he slapped a hand on my back. "Don't look so down. She wasn't hurt, and she seems to be adjusting well."

"How long was I out?" I asked.

"About 4 days."

I grunted. That seemed reasonable after being injected with such an intense dose of suppressants. And at least now I made it through my rut without doing any more damage.

"They didn't even give her a name." I noted suddenly. I quickly scanned the document to make sure I hadn't missed it, but I only saw the short series of numbers, 2-46.

"It appears that they've given themselves their own names." Conri explained.

I glanced up at him with a look of shock. "What's her name?"

"Dot."

I closed my eyes tiredly and tried to remember her. Dot. Her dazzling teary eyes sprang into my mind and it made my gut twist painfully. Dot. Why did she choose that name? Did she? Or did one of the other omegas choose it for her? Inspecting her picture again, I couldn't think of her as any other name though. She was like a tiny dot on my skin that I'd never again be able to wash off. As permanent as a birth mark.

"Would you like to meet her?" Conri rose to his feet and watched me expectantly.

"Uh," I stuttered. Was that a good idea? Would I lose control again? "I don't think…"

Before I could come up with some lame excuse, a knock on the door sounded just before the healer entered. She was of average height with a sturdy build, and her dark hair was tied into a low pony tail. She was young to be a doctor, but she was extremely competent. I held in a growl. She should be looking after my mate, not me.

"You look well, Alpha." She said with a smile.

I gave a hum of acknowledgment, but after years of maintaining the good image of a leader, I was too tired for anything else. It was no secret that I was cold.

Instead of saying anything else to me, she turned to my son with a respectful dip of her head. "The scientist is awake, Luna."

I sprang to my feet with a snarl. I'd almost forgotten about the man the rescue team had captured along with the abused omegas. Rage built in my stomach and the veins in my neck bulged. He was one of the ones responsible for the state of my mate!

Both of the other wolves stepped back defensively, but it was my son who spoke. "We're questioning him now." He explained.

"Where is he?" I seethed. Blood dripped from my clenched claws.

"You need to worry about your mate." The doctor reminded. "Not this man."

I spat a wad of saliva on the floor. "I'll kill him." I hissed and repeated, "Where is he?"

"Wait a minute, dad." Conri held his hands up as if he could hold back my anger. "We still need him. We still need information."

Maybe it was because he called me dad, but some of my anger simmered. He hadn't called me dad in such a long time.

"I won't kill him." I slowly blew air out through my mouth, but my eyes still darkened. "But let me help."

Conri pinched his mouth as the doctor's head bounced between him and me. However, after a few tense moments, he nodded sharply and spun on his heel.

My mouth curled into a deranged smile. Whoever this man was, he needed to pay.