I am free

Beau. 

How many times do I have to bend and break before I finally fall? I can't count how many times I have turned. My bones feel weak, my wolf is exhausted. I thought this would be easy. I had it all figured out in my head. 

This is not supposed to be hard but it is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. Jules wants this done a certain way. He doesn't want me to turn fully, he doesn't want me to be more human than wolf, he wants it half of each. I know what he is asking for, I can see it in my head. I am trying to give him what he wants but every time I think I have mastered it, I end up the way I usually am. 

Just an animal on all four. 

''You are getting sidetracked. I need your mind with me right now,'' he yells already getting impatient.