If That Happened, She Would Blame Herself

The light of the morning sun slipped past the opening of the curtains, slowly waking Shouko up from her sleep. Her lashes fluttered slightly. She opened her eyes. Her view was blurry for a moment before the sight of someone sleeping next to her jolted her awake.

Shouko widened her eyes in surprise. She blinked a few times as confusion flashed in her mind before she recalled what happened last night.

Right... I did allow him to sleep with me...

Her face flushed red in an instant.

Kyoya was sleeping deeply on the other side of the bed. There was still a gap between them, except for the linking of their hands. He lightly held her hand as he slept.

This man...

Even after the few hugs and the kiss they shared, he was still maintaining a respectful distance to her when they were sleeping. He had also purposely didn't use the same blanket as her.

How could he be so considerate?

Shouko didn't realize she was smiling.

It was 7 in the morning. She would hear footsteps outside of her private ward as the doctors and nurses did their morning rounds. Even though she felt reluctant, she still needed to wake him up.

"Kyoya, it's morning," Shouko tapped his shoulder, trying to get him up. "Wake up."

Kyoya stirred in his sleep as he felt a soft touch on his shoulder. He squinted his eyes, blinked a few times before his sense gradually returned.

"Oh..." He was startled, the sleepiness in his eyes dispersed when he stared at her face right next to him. "Aa... good morning..."

Seeing his awkward look made Shouko stifled a laughter. Suddenly, her bashfulness was replaced with relief. He appeared so much better than the previous days. It might be because he could get a good night's sleep.

"Morning, Kyoya," Shouko smiled. Her eyes went to their hands that were still linked to each other. A rosy color tinged her cheeks. "Err... could you release your hand first?"

"Ah! Sorry!"

Kyoya immediately let go of her hand. He quickly sat up on the bed. The awkwardness was still apparent on his face as he looked at Shouko dumbly.

"Last night..."

Shouko let out a laugh. She smiled funnily seeing his messy hair. Right now, his intimidating aura from when he faced the woman from yesterday was replaced with something soft and subtle, making him look like a teenage boy.

"Did you have a good sleep?" She inquired while carefully peered at his complexion.

"I did," Kyoya answered briefly. He indeed felt refreshed after waking up compared to before. His lips hooked up into a smile. "Thanks to you."

"That's good." She returned his smile.

Shouko and Kyoya went to wash their faces in the ensuite washroom respectively. The doctor would be here shortly for a morning check-up on her.

"Mrs. Kashino's condition is good," The female doctor said as she passed a paper to a nurse standing beside her. "Considering you were in an accident a month back, I could safely say there were no repercussions but it's still better to take extra care in these few days. You also need to nourish your body well."

Shouko nodded her head, the doctor had been informed of the accident that fell on her during history taking yesterday. "Then, could I be discharged today?"

The doctor turned her attention to Kyoya. "You said you'd be here for a few more days, Mr. Kashino?"

"Yes," Kyoya answered firmly. "We're here for a getaway."

"I'll prescribe the medicine you need and list down on what you have to be attentive to," The doctor wrote something on the clipboard in her hands."If you feel shortness of breath or extreme lethargy suddenly, please come to the hospital."

"Alright. Thank you, doctor," Shouko smiled in gratitude.

She actually disliked the feeling of being in a hospital. She didn't feel this way before but ever since she woke up after the accident, the uneasiness was there in her heart.

Yesterday, she was overwhelmed with the incident that happened in the shopping district so she didn't mind much with the feeling but now, she wanted to get out of this place as soon as possible.

"I'll handle the discharge procedure," Kyoya handed Shouko a wool cardigan. Even though the heating system in the hospital was decent but he was still afraid if she would feel cold. "We'll eat breakfast first. I ordered a chicken and corn porridge for you."

"Thank you, Kyoya."

Shouko accepted the cardigan. She immediately wore it. When she raised her hands to take out her hair that was trapped between the cardigan and her hospital pajamas, Kyoya suddenly walked forward and reached out for her hair.

"You don't have to thank me every single time," Kyoya said in a low voice. He gently brought her hair out of the cardigan and let the black strand fell behind her back. The softness lingered from his palm to his fingertips. "You're my wife, my responsibility."

Shouko's lips parted slightly as she stared at his firm gaze. After a moment, she nodded with her cheeks flushed red.

Kyoya smiled in satisfaction.

Soon, a bodyguard brought their meal. They ate in silence yet the atmosphere didn't feel awkward or amiss. Once they were done, Kyoya went to proceed with her discharge. Shouko stood near the opened window of the ward, enjoying the soft breeze of the autumn wind.

A spectacular view laid before her eyes. The deep red color of the maple leaves had created a field of red. A few people were walking in the hospital garden while chatting. A group of children in hospital pajamas was playing with a ball at one corner. Traces of their laughter floated in the air as they were drifted off by the wind.

When Shouko saw their happy expression, she couldn't help but be reminded of the little boy from last night.

Those bruises... How many more were hidden under his clothes?

Shouko wrapped her cardigan tighter around her body, her brows knitted in displeasure.

If she didn't know Kyoya's history of being abused by his mother, she would only think he stepped out to stop the abusive woman out of goodwill. But, since she knew about it, his action last night might be driven by his own tragic past.

She wondered if she should ask him about the matter?

But, her idea fell as soon as she thought of it.

Kyoya had slowly opened up his heart to heart, revealing a part of his weaknesses even when she had yet to remember him. She was afraid it would be a bad move for her to mention it.

"Maybe, I need to let nature takes its course," Shouko whispered to herself after she made her decision. "Someday, he would tell me."

While Shouko was immersed in seeing the view outside of the windows, her ears caught the sound of several footsteps approaching her ward. She turned around slowly. A few seconds later, the door was opened from the outside before a familiar man stepped inside.

"Shouko," Kyoya called out to her with a smile on his face, his dark gaze was imbued with tenderness. "The Maeda couple come to see you."

Shouko was stunned, she forgot that she actually wanted to see Little Haruki last night. But, due to the unforeseen incident, she didn't get the chance to see him.

Behind Kyoya, a pair of husband and wife entered the ward with a small child holding the young woman's hand. The child was dressed in a hospital pajamas. Despite having a bandage on his left wrist, he appeared lively.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Kashino," The man spoke first. His eyes were filled with thankfulness from the way he looked at Shouko who was still standing near the windows. "I'm Haruki's father, Maeda Akira. We are here to offer you our gratitude for saving our son."

"Yes, Mrs. Kashino," The woman beside him nodded. Her lips were curved into a smile yet her eyes were reddened with tears. "If not for you, we might lose our precious child. We were so scared when we didn't find him during the fire."

In the next second, the husband and wife gave Shouko a deep bow, startling her. Their voices rose a degree in the quiet ward.

"Thank you again, Mrs. Kashino!"

"That... You don't have to bow to me!" Shouko eyed the family of three. She was at a loss of words as she was flustered by their action. "Please, raise your heads."

Mr. Maeda and his wife slowly straightened their bodies. Both of them were smiling with their eyes moistened with tears. Their lips pursed tightly as they tried to hold back the warm liquid from falling down their faces.

Shouko smiled helplessly. Her eyes went to the child. "Are you alright now, Little Haruki?"

"En! Thank you, Aunt!" The boy nodded his head. He smiled broadly, revealing his baby teeth. Then, he added, "I went to play by myself and got separated from Daddy and Mommy."

Shouko stifled a laugh. Her eyes were stung with warm pearls. She quickly rubbed them away. A sense of relief flooded her heart.

If she didn't take the drastic action yesterday, would this happy scene of family of three being changed to a pair of young parents crying in anguish with their child laid lifelessly?

If that happened... she would blame herself.

"Then, it's all good," Shouko smiled softly, her heart was filled with a clashing of emotions at the moment.

Shouko took a few steps toward them before she stopped in front of the boy. She crouched down and peered at his face. "Next time, you should be careful. Don't be separated from your parents, alright? They would worry."

"Okay, Aunt," Little Haruki nodded again.

While Shouko kept talking with the little one, she didn't realize the change of emotion in the man standing beside her.

Kyoya stared at her back view, sorrow flickered in his eyes.

"Then, we won't disturb you any longer," Mrs. Maeda said once she glanced at the clock hung on the wall. They had been here for quite a while. She patted her son's little head and added, "Our son still needs to be attended to the doctor. If everything is well, he could be discharged by tomorrow."

Besides the physical examination, Little Haruki was placed under a child psychiatrist's care too in order to observe his mental state if he was left with trauma from the horrendous incident.

"That's good! He's still so young, it'd be great if nothing else happens," Shouko reached out a hand and lightly pinched the boy's chubby cheek. "You need to grow up quick, child. Always listen to your parents, alright?"

"Okay, Aunt," Little Haruki answered. He raised up both of his hands, holding his parents' hands with his short ones. Then, he shouted with a proud smile, "I love Mommy and Daddy the most! I'd listen to them."

Shouko laughed again hearing his clever reply. She gave the boy the last head rub before waving them goodbye.

Even after the door being closed, she still could hear the family's faint voices talking merrily to each other. It was clear their relationship had always been in harmony.

Kyoya, who hadn't spoken a word ever since he brought the Maeda family to meet Shouko, quietly went to her side. Shouko looked up. She frowned when she saw his downcast look.

"Kyoya, what's wrong?" She couldn't help but ask. What had bothered him right now?

Kyoya listlessly shook his head. A weary smile hung on his lips. "It's nothing. It seems like you've taken a fancy to the little boy. You looked happy when you talked to him earlier."

"You're right," Shouko smiled, agreeing with him. "I was so relieved when I saw him just now. They are a happy family. I just thought if I didn't rush into the fire... maybe today, they would be grieving for their lost child."

Kyoya's eyes dilated for a second in surprise before he quickly closed them to suppress the agony from being evident on his face. He took a step closer and held her in his embrace.

"Kyoya?" Shouko was confused. Her face was pressed against his study chest, leaving her no room to retreat.

Kyoya heaved a deep breath, he rested his face on the side of her head. His heart shuddered terribly as he quietly hugged her tight.

Shouko didn't inquire about anything. She could feel that something was wrong with this man. Seeing that he didn't have the intention to speak, she silently patted his broad shoulders, offering him comfort.

The gap between them might become a bit closer during this journey yet, it would still hard for both of them to reveal everything that had been hidden in their hearts.

Only time would tell.