With Him

***PAUL***

The bell rang exactly as soon as the Instructor dismiss the class. One week almost past and I didn't see Althea ever since from the hospital after our deep conversation.

One day, Maria approach me and ask herself to leave Althea alone. She forbidden me to contact Althea not even sending a single message. I attended all my schedules of classes but all were useless. Sometimes, when I entered the class, I went silently to the corner and thinks a lot about the conversation we had. There are multiple times where my name was called by the instructors to answer his/her questions but I failed to comply. For God's sake, I feel guilty for the whole time.

Thinking it thoroughly, I think abortion is the best way for both of our cases. We are too young and I am sure we are not matured yet. I don't want to hold any responsibilities right now. For all of my life, I promise myself to become an architect someday no matter what hardships I may encounter throughout the school year. Not until now that I am in my last level and I can soon take the review then prepare for board examination.

I know it is a great sin to have an abortion, but for me it is a greater sin to raise a child but unable to provide their basic needs. I know that I can provide it if I'm willing. All I need to do is ask some assistance to my parents in terms of financial. However, I don't want to rely on my parents or else I believe that we will both end up in the church. And definitely, I will not let it happen. I'm not yet ready to tie my self to someone I'm not sure. I made a promise to myself since the day we broke Precious that I will have the girl to marry who is deserving and definitely must receive an unconditional love from me. And right now is not yet the right time unless I will become a professional and surely can take all my responsibilities as a father and husband. The most important will be able to provide all the needs to the partner of my life.

Though there are circumstances that we fought to each other, I accept that Althea is not hard to fall in love. She has this beautiful brown eyes that you always longing for. She has the long wavy black hair that was always simply tied that adds more to her angelic face. She is different from the others, very simple and conservative but hard to please. Everytime we encountered, I always have the urge to challenge her, to piss her off, but at the end I always wanted and craved for her kisses. These are the only times that I losses control. I can't act normally when she was around. One thing I'm sure of myself, I'm not a playboy and not used to hurt girls.

I cannot explain the feelings I have for her. Maybe because I'm not use of the girls who neglected my presence even though I'm popular inside the whole campus. And maybe because of that reason that somehow she had my attention. I was glad when she bet on me to have a one month relationship for her to prove that she didn't like me at all. I don't know, but all of a sudden I felt an excitement. For all I care, I didn't realize that I wants her presence.

***

Walking along the corridor together with Alexander and Rey when suddenly I bump to someone. Before she was about to fall on the floor cause of the huge impact between our bodies, I immediately grab her right wrist and hold slightly her waist to balance her.

It was only a second before she compose her self again and escape from my grip.

"I apologize for my carelessness." she said while slightly bowing her head without looking into my eyes even a little bit. My heart was like being squeezed by someone with hatred. This is not what I wanted between us. Having a gap and acting like we didn't know each other at all. And I just realize how I miss to piss her off.

"Hey, are you okay?" my senses came back to reality upon hearing the worried voice of someone in her back.

"Thank you for the concern Kyle but I'm totally fine." then she smiled sweetly to the guy who stand protectively at her back.

"Would you care to move a little bit so that we can have our way." she said seriously pertaining me with Rey and Alexander to clean the pathway.

"Oh! I'm sorry. Sure." then I let my palms lead the way.

"What's the matter between the two of you Paul?" Alexander asked with curiosity as soon as they left.

"What do you mean exactly?"

"No need to act as if you don't understand what I mean Paul. What's the matter between the two of you? Care to explain the cold stares darting to each other? Did you fight?"

"No, not exactly!" I said lamely not wanting to broaden the topic.

"Then what it is? Why it seems like the whole world burdens you a lot?"

"Don't worry, I will share to you my burden someday Alexander. Just wait a little time. " I said then tap slightly his shoulder.

"Hey, speaking of!"Rey and Alexander said in unison.

"What?" I asked curiously not knowing what they pertained.

"Who's that guy? Why they seems so close? Did you just see that? Did he just get and carry the things of Althea?"

"Yeah! I think so bro! Are they in a serious relationship?"

"F*ck! Did he just hug Althea? And in a public place? Look, they already catch the attention of others."

My palm form into a fist unknowingly. Small jeolousy form inside. Not until now that I realize that my feelings toward her is not a simply an attraction. I saw him pulling things from her hands then he simply carry it. Althea said something to him then for my surprise, he hug her tightly not bothering the pairs of eyes around them.

I walk towards to them and pull Althea from his hands.

"What are you doing?" he asked in a norrow eyebrows.

"We need to talk Althea. Please have a minutes with me."

"What do you want?"

" Just have a minute with me! And I want it in a private. Alone!" I added pointing out that I don't want any disturbance.

"Okay. Kyle, no need to wait for me. You may go first to the gym." so the guy's name is Kyle. Then Althea starts to grab her things but he refuse to give it.

" I will bring your things to your room. No need to stress yourself Althea. I hope you know already your situation." what's wrong with him? Why did he acts like a concerned boyfriend. As what I've known, she don't date anyone. She doesn't have a boyfriend.

"No need to send her things." I simply said. then continued, " I will bring that one." then without any warning, I pull out her things from his hands.

"Crazy!" she mumbled.

" I heard you!" I commented with a small smirk on my face.

"What do you want?" she asked immediately as we seated to the one of the benches. The scenery is simply romantic that we are facing towards the lake and beautiful flowers bloom lovingly.

"Let's make our relationship for real Althea."

"And?" she simply added to my statement.

"I want you and I to become an official. I didn't realize that my feelings for you had already deepen." I heavily sigh then pause for a moment before I continued. "I was jeolous earlier when I saw him holding you freely." I confess. "I want to become honest to myself and to you. This is my second time that I like somebody not because of the pretty face but because I just like how you are."

"Are you serious? Then how about the child? Are you ready to take your responsibility Paul?" she asked sadly while gazing to the lake.

"As what I'd said to you Althea, let's abort the child. Let be practical for the situation right now. We are both a graduating student. And we all know that the child inside your belly right now was just a result of our single accident."

" You are really unbelievable, you know that? And you want my answer right now of what you have said? It is a big NO! I hope you will mark it inside your head. No matter what will happen, I will never abort my child." then she pause for a moment gazing towards the silent waves. "Let this beautiful scenery forget the past Paul. Don't worry, this is the last moment I beg you for the child. I assure you with my life, I will definitely forget that this beautiful creature inside does have a father once."

"As what you have said, we are still too young right now. But... I will try my best to handle this, ... alone. Let us be civil to each other. We are not a teenager anymore. If someday, we have to meet each other in other circumstances, I ask you to act as a normal person. Forget everything. Erase your child in your mind as well as me. And I will do the same." then she left.