12 albatrosses

"Honey, want some cereal? Have you had breakfast yet?" Mrs. Marcell asked, noticing how the girl had been staring at the cereal box for 5 minutes straight.

She had not had breakfast yet. Or any food yesterday, in fact. Her father had been gone for 4 days on a business trip, and her mother was either busy talking on the phone or getting drunk. She had been thankful her father was gone so long and she could avoid any injuries, but at the same time she dreaded feeling hungry and ignored instead.

She knew she deserved it, she had been a bad girl as long as she could remember. Knocking over things, breaking things, staining things. She tried to be nice to her parents, but she couldn't go more than a few days without messing things up.

And when Mrs. Marcell asked her if she wanted any food, she didn't know if she deserved it.

"Yes, I had breakfast," she lies, suddenly remembering the beatings her father threatened her with if she were ever to tell the truth. "But... I think I'm still a bit hungry." She figured if she only half-lied, it wouldn't count.

Mrs. Marcell was a warm, cheery person that she could always rely on. She was the nicest woman she'd ever met, always caring for her like she was her own child, despite the fact that she already had 2. But it seemed every time she told a lie her smile would fade and her gaze would turn cold.

This time, she was staring at Scarlett's bony, pale wrists as she poured her a bowl.

"Why are you sad?" She asks the lady. "Did I do something wrong?"

Mrs. Marcell immediately flashes Scarlett a bright smile. "No, no, no, why would you think that? I'm sorry if I look unhappy. I'm just a bit tired, that's all."

"Oh, okay."

The minute she slides the cereal in front of her face, she gobbles it down practically in one bite. She didn't know why she was so hungry, it hadn' been that long since she last ate. Although, she did usually eat more when she was with this family, so maybe her parents didn't feed her enough.

Or maybe her parents were normal and these parents were too nice.

So many thoughts were jumbled up in her head. She didn't want to think about anything anymore, all she wanted to do was just eat. After she finishes her first bowl, Mrs. Marcell pours her another without even asking.

Why? Why was she being so nice to a bad girl like her?

1 more bowl later, she finally decides she's had enough. Looking across the table, she realizes Johnny had only eaten half of his portion, picking at the sugary flakes still stuck on the ceramic-like it was contaminated.

Suddenly, she noticed Mrs. Marcell was giving him a death glare. Mrs. Marcell was crazy when it came to wasting things. Whether it was keeping water bottles and cans to sell to the dump or not finishing every last bit of food, she made sure everyone was being resourceful.

Jonathan seemed to take the hint, shoving the last few spoonful's in his mouth while his mother was watching.

Scarlett glanced back at Mrs. Marcell's face again, shocked when she notices the same thousand-yard stare had returned. She was no longer staring at Johnny, nor Scarlett, or really anything in particular. Something had to be up. She wasn't normally like this for long.

She knew it was probably because of her. Maybe she wrinkled the couch covers or broke something by accident. She scanned around, looking for any possible mistake she could have made that made her look so gloomy. But finding nothing in particular.

Minutes pass. No one says anything.

"Hey, Johnny!" Scarlett jumped at her sudden change of tone. "You wanna take Scarlett to the park or go play with the kids down the street? I have to talk to someone."

Scarlett really wanted to go play on the monkey bars, but at the same time she was hesitant because of the mean kids there. They always looked at her and Johnny weirdly and whispered things behind their backs.

Johnny didn't respond for a moment, so Scarlett decided to speak up. "I'd like to go." She says, trying to make Mrs. Marcell feel happy again.

"Yeah, sure." Johnny responds.

He gets up from his chair and Scarlett follows, grabbing her favorite sweater off the coat rack before she forgets. But before they can walk out the door, Mrs. Marcell says, "Hey, Johnny, make sure Scarlett doesn't get into any trouble, alright?"

He nods in response, and the two head out the door and start walking down the street. "What's wrong?" Johnny asks, taking notice of Scarlett's grumbling and annoyed look.

"Why does your mom always tell you to look after me? I'm already 10 years old, I can do stuff myself!"

Jonathan tries to hide back his snickers but fails in doing so.

"What?" She asks, getting more irritated by the second.

"Already 10 years old? You make it sound like you just turned 50."

Scarlett just crosses her arms and grumbles some more. "Whatever... meanie."

Barely five minutes later, they make it to the park and walk down the dirt road leading to the monkey bars. Both of them split up, Johnny taking his book underneath the slide, and Scarlett trying to jump and reach the monkey bars. But before she grabs onto the metal bar, she notices a group of kids playing hopscotch down the road. Hmm.. should she go there? She loved hopscotch, it was her favorite game.

But the kids... They were annoying and mean.

She takes a look over at Jonathan, preoccupied, and looking totally unaware of everything else. Maybe she could go over there without him noticing. She'd prove she wouldn't need any stupid help. She didn't care if the kids didn't like her, she wanted to play hopscotch and that was that.

She runs over to the group and says, "Hi. Can I play?" In a small, quiet voice.

She sounded so weak. Like a stupid stray kitten, no wonder why all the kids didn't like her.

They were all speechless, looking at her strangely. Immediately she started to feel self-conscious, wondering why the heck she even bothered asking. But all of a sudden, someone speaks up. "No," says a girl standing across from Scarlett. A few other girls surrounded her like she had some sort of army.

Scarlett stood there, overcome by a wave of sadness and helplessness.

Why? She wondered. Why does everyone hate me? She knew she wasn't friends with anybody here, and she did fight with the kids a decent amount, but the least they would do was just be a bit nicer.

The girl gave Scarlett an icy stare and said, "Go away. No one here likes you."

That one sentence had hit her like a punch in the gut.

None of the other kids said a word. She had to do something about it, she couldn't just stand there looking like an idiot. Without even thinking, she yells, "Shithead!" and runs over to the girl, kicking her in the stomach as hard as she can. She doubles over in pain, coughing.

People froze, staring back at her in utter shock like she was some kind of monster. The girl she kicked was now crying, but looking like she wanted to kill her. "You dummy!" She reaches out to hit Scarlett back while clutching her side at the same time. "Th-that hurt!"

Scarlett didn't care if it hurt. She got hurt more than these stupid prissies ever did.

She could feel her temperature rising, and a boiling fury swelled inside of her. The girl had missed her, giving her an opportunity to hit her back. She thought back to her father doing the same, trying to copy the way he hit.

And then she punches her in the same spot, sudden and full-fledged. The girl was now the helpless one, and she felt powerful. She didn't care that she was in pain, she didn't care about the other kids, all she cared about was letting all her emotions out in the worst way possible. There was another brisk movement from her leg, flying towards the girl's stomach and the hands trying to protect it.

By now she was practically in her own world, smashing and kicking this girl without even paying attention to the kids running behind her. That is, until she feels something knocking her off her feet, causing her arms to smash onto the pavement and a new set of wounds to appear. Tears started to well up in her eyes but she held them back, knowing that would make her look even more vulnerable. She had to get back up, she had to.

But all she wanted to do was lay on the ground and sleep.

She lifted up her head and looked at the kids surrounding her, about to hurt her. Half of them were gone and the other half was staring her down like she was some sort of test subject.

She was outnumbered. Why didn't she consider this earlier?

Before she can do anything, one kid takes action lifts up his leg to kick her in the ribs. She doesn't move or even get back up, just stays there and waits for the brutal collision she'd feel any minute now. She had lost. There was no way she could take on 4 boys and a girl at the same time.

But after a few seconds, she's shocked when nothing happens.

"Seriously, man? Why is he here?" Scarlett jolts up at the noise, finding the 3 boys looking in a different direction.

Towards Jonathan.

With the 4th boy was lying headfirst into the concrete.

"Come on, man." One says to his friend. "Let's get outta here." The 2 of them help the other boy up and start to run away, looking genuinely terrified of her friend.

Why were they all afraid of Jonathan, but not her?

"Hey!" Scarlett says. "Don't you run away like that! I'll beat you up!" She springs up and starts to run after them as fast as she can. But in the middle of her sprint, she's stopped by a pair of arms pulling her back.

"Scarlett, stop it."

She turned around, finding Jonathan giving her the same death glare as his mother gave him. No wonder they were scared of him. Why couldn't people look at her that way?

"Let me go!" She says, trying to break out of his grip.

"No. Your not going back to them."

She tries over and over again to push him back, but soon gives up when she realizes he's not going to let go. She stood there, frozen and unsure of what to do. She felt like a stupid loser yet again. Why couldn't she ever win anything?

Despite her efforts to hold back, a tightening of her throat and a short intake of breath was all it took for her to burst out crying. Red-hot tears ran down her face, each one carving furrows on the tender flesh that still stung from the fall.

Nothing could ever just work out. All she wanted to do was be a normal kid and go play hopscotch. No fighting. But they made her fight. They made her so, so angry. Why could she never come here without an argument or a fight? Why could she never go home without a fight? There was fighting everywhere, and she hated it. Yet, it was always what she reacted with.

That, and running away from the ones she started.

"Come on, Scarlett. It's okay." Jonathan says, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. "Let's start going back."

She didn't respond to Johnny, just stood there and buried her head in his arms like a little baby.

"Scarlett. Moping around like this will only make things worse. Besides, even though you didn't win against those 4, you did beat the living shit out of that girl."'

She was annoyed by Johnny's demands, but knew he was right. "Yeah.." She says, sniffling.

"You'll be okay. Lets go back and get some band aids for your elbows." He pulls Scarlett back and she trudges along, barely bothering to lift her feet off the ground.

And yet again, she had turned back into that puny, black stray kitten. Always being seen as bad luck and being kicked around by those afraid of it.