Chapter 3: Women

I wake up in bed next to Pei Ling. She lays down on her back her light brown hair is flattened on the pillow. Her face twisted in discomfort.

The light of the moon enters through Pei Ling's bedroom window and the sky is black.

I remember laying down next to her to get her to sleep because of her cramps.

I prop my head on my arms laying down to watch Ling's facial expressions.

She cycles from frowns, a strained look and then gasps for air. She continues until she settles down into a neutral face and her body becomes less tense.

Realizing that she settled down, I get up myself and head out of the room to let her get rest.

The floor creaks lightly as I walk down the halls. The rich mahogany wood walls have slowly been losing their shine.

And like all things that were once grand they seem to fall in disrepair the older they get and the more things that it battles no longer strengthens it.

It falls and crumbles without a choice at an invasion.

"That is worrisome." I say inspecting the walls. It is peeling. I should fix this tomorrow or replace it with something else.

I keep walking down the silent halls. The rustling of trees accompanies my steps.

Only Wenrou was up this early and unlike everyone else she was just getting ready for bed.

"Couldn't sleep?" I ask.

She turns to face me.

"A bit. It is a force of habit, sleep late and wake early. But there are days where I completely sleep through. It is an odd one. Though, I haven't slept this late before. Good night Shen-Xiong." She wraps her hair up, and then slides into her room.

"It seems even the night bird needs rest."

I continue to walk down the halls until I get to my room. The sound of drumming from far away catches my attention first. Then the lingering scent of something floral and perfumed permeates the air.

The aroma descends onto my senses from Hua Li's slightly creaked open doors. Unusual for Hua Li to expose herself to others as she opts to not be vulnerable.

The smell stronger in essence at the door, it most likely will get ten times stronger at it's source. Inside Hua Li is crouched into a corner in a light pink dress, dark magentas on the other fabrics.

"Hua Li, are you alright?" I ask.

"You actually came… This is a surprise." She speaks in her soft voice a twinge of doubt makes it seem more like an innocent show of shock.

"Why does Miss Pei only deserve your love?" She doesn't look up at me, but I can feel her jealousy and hurt feelings. "What if I wanted a child too? Would you give me one?"

She moved faster than I could process. Her hand at my collar and my belt.

"He Shen," She takes my face in her hands. Kisses peck against my cheek and neck.

"Perhaps you would rather me undress first?"

She pulls her ribbon down and her clothing glides down her frame.

Without anything on, I see a horror that makes me question everything.

But boys and girls are supposed to look different under their pants. Why do we look the same underneath?

Under the heavy revelations of what the female body looks like. I gasp out:

"I am so sorry," I push away from Hua Li and grab the door frame panicked. "I don't think I can."

My breathing gotten heavier as she closed in on me.

"Excuse me, I need to go."

I always thought that I would be like the guys. By guys standards, I just thought I was a weird boy with a puffy chest like every other young boy developing, I just wasn't a man yet.

It isn't like I bathed near my friends or undressed around them either when we were little. But we did hang out together shirtless and my chest was similar to at least one of my friend's.

But they would joke around about how different a woman's body is.

I am missing an appendage if this is what a woman's body looks like.

I rush outside and fall down near the well. Even pressing my hands to my chest I can feel the mounds that have been growing more recently. I don't think these are weird lumps anymore.

Am I a woman?

When my panic clears, I know who I must see. And by the goddess do they have a lot to answer for.