49 Training Montage
****(POV)
Book demon here! You guys missed me, right?! Today I have a horror story for you guys. So here it goes.
It was the dead of the night. I was comfy snuggling in the raw unedited chapters. Yes, that huge stockpile I was talking about earlier. Anyway, my peaceful slumber was suddenly disturbed by something.
I awoke startled. He sat there. In the complete darkness. His face illuminated by the red glow of his screen. Laughing to himself akin to a demon.
That is coming from an actual demon! How creepy does one's laugh have to be to scare a demon? Very. Very very very!
My instinct told me one simple thing. The less I knew the better I would fare. But as they say… The curiosity killed the little demon. I approached carefully. He was monologuing to himself, aloud. Yes, in the middle of the night, while cackling.
Something about a training montage?
Something about it not being a Zombie novel if there wasn't any.
Something about a guy that is renowned for his bloody movies.
Something about a guy that is renowned for his explosive ones.
Something about a writer that always has the same MC's name.
As if he'd be one to talk! I've heard about the nameless character! What insanity is this?!
Anyway, approaching was a mistake. He looked at me with a small smirk. Then he grabbed me.
I wanted to escape. Running from him is impossible. He told me that if I was so interested in it... I should become part of it.
That he would check the comments to make sure I did a good job. Then he went back to typing and left me alone. So here I am.
What am I supposed to do?! What does doing a good job even mean?! How does one do a training montage? This book demon is not good at singing! This book demon is not good at dancing either!
*Sigh* Being a book demon nowadays is hard. This book demon will try finding cool kaomoji for you guys! I better not see any complaints in the comments! Otherwise, I will haunt you!
****
The training is harsh. Getting stabbed over and over by some old guy is not fun! I do not swing that way! By that I mean I keep swinging my stick the wrong way. So hard. Like really hard.
I do figure out a trick to help me improve faster. It will sound a bit ridiculous, but I swear it works! Okay so picture a cool song playing while the fight happens. This is to give you enough energy. I don't know, something related to the moves we are doing.
*SLASH*
That is part one. Then you want to make it even more epic. You want to picture your surroundings to be something like…
*A world on fire! *
Yeah, that's sick! Okay, now you are hearing it and imagining it. Great! The next part is to hype yourself while humming. What do you want to hum?
Well, anything that sounds cool really. Anything that sounds like it would give meaning to this fight. Here goes nothing. Queue the training montage!
****
♬♩♪♩(>◒< )
I may be tragic! I may be born to lose!
You're a product of magic!
I'm the one getting the abuse!
*\( • ω •\)
Today you may be the master
Your slave I won't be forever
This training is such a disaster
*(｢• ω •)｢
I'll fight it
My spirit won't submit
Of that, you can be sure
*⁽⁽◝( • ω • )◜⁾⁾
Imagine the world on fire
I won't get pushed to the edge
Burning all, let's go higher
That I do pledge
*✺◟( • ω • )◞✺
This is my conviction
Keep training, will come the light
Nothing to be my inhibition
I will be bidding my time
*(〜• ω •)〜
Just try me
All in this fight
You will see
*〜(• ω •〜)
Imagine the world on fire
I won't get pushed to the edge
Burning all, let's go higher
That I do pledge
♬♩♪♩(>◒< )
****
Something like that. I am getting my ass beaten. No time to compose a song. But I do have it looping in my head.
I am shaking my ass to it., swinging my arm to it., enduring hit after hit to it. I should have done that in the initial part too. Music makes everything better. Well, except musical comedies.
See I enjoy music and I enjoy comedies. Just not both. Kinda like how I enjoy driving and drinking. But not at once. Kinda like I like tits and my homie. But not my homie's tits. Well, you get it.
At first, I am extremely slow. I can't even perceive exactly when he is attacking. Well, I can when I start bleeding. The more it goes and the more I …. Can't see any progress.
But even then, my will remains strong. Like I've been singing about that in my head. For a while too. It takes a long time.
At some point, my judgment does get sharper. My swings faster. I start to be able to dodge and parry. This feels amazing!
Well, anyone would love to not get beaten up. Actually, some people do enjoy that stuff. Still, pretty sure no one would when the partner is a dead ghost. Like sure perhaps if it was a sexy dominatrix. Not the dead guy for sure!
Oh god, I just thought of something. Remember the spider? I guess at some point we will come into contact with civilization, right? I can already picture rule 34 requests piling up. I don't know why I'm thinking of this now…
Wouldn't it be possible to start an idol group with the spider's figure and the siren's voice? I cringed a little while imagining a big-ass goldfish become an idol. There would be lip-syncing of course. That will remain a thought for later.
In this manner, I finally improve. Today I finally manage to fight him to a standstill! This is an incredible achievement! How long did that take me?
Just about …. Actually...I have no damn clue. How long did this last? Eh… Anyway, time for some more anti-sleep training! Yes, etiquette.
****(POV)
This is madness. Even I with my boundless experience cannot believe it. He came out with his own way of fighting.
He started humming while we clashed. It doesn't make any sense but as soon as he did he changed. He went from an uncoordinated puppet to... Point is, he started improving at an incredible rate.
Weirdly, every time he stopped that song of his he would revert back. This is illogical! Well, so is him managing to reach the level of a swordmaster.
Something that took me centuries he did in weeks. The people used to call me a genius too. I wonder how they would react if only they knew. I'm betting a heart attack.
What miracle will he accomplish next I wonder...
