48 Epic Fight

Must remain awake. Must keep my eyes open. Must not give in to the temptation.

Keep going. Just like that. This will all pay off. Persevere until it is over. Man, this is hard!

From time to time, I pinch myself. It helps to stay awake a little longer. I would add some slapping, but it would seem weird.

Right now, is not yet the moment for face-slapping. Gotta be patient. It will come. Soon enough. Just need to remain strong. My will is stronger than …idk.

If the topic was a little bit interesting it wouldn't be that bad. Sadly, it covers so much boring content.

Greeting etiquette.

Conversational etiquette.

Table etiquette.

Standing etiquette.

Walking etiquette.

I really wish I could simply flip table right now! How am I falling asleep while standing and walking? That is a good question! How is it even possible? I swear this ghost has some kind of magical power. A power that only activates once he starts talking about that topic.

Oh my god! That is some mythical level of power right there! Imagine an epic fight between two master-level swordsmen. The tension is high. Both are facing each other, glaring at their opponent.

Whoever makes a wrong move is bound to die instantly. Then one of them opens his mouth. He smirks. Then he starts reciting. What kind of forbidden technique is he using? One so strong it could defeat even the famous Yggdrasil's pupil.

Yes, that one technique! Teach-etiquette-no-jutsu! Dread appears on the face of the opponent. But only for an instant. His eyes slowly close by themselves. Then, he falls to the ground.

*Thud*

Even then he remains fast asleep. The master swordsman that just won goes nearby.

"See fool! This is the power of etiquette!"

Add a finishing assassination move and done. I'm sure something like that has probably happened. Why? Is there any better way to use such a power?! Definitively not!

The problem is that I am the current target. Yes, this scary art is currently aimed at me. But I am resilient!

I keep fighting and fighting! Drowsiness never to claim me! Thus, I learn and bid my time. The more he goes on, the more I realize that he truly cares about the topic.

This is really sad but mostly annoying. Him loving that pointless stuff is fine. Why drag me into it?! We are in a damn forest! Where the hell would I need that knowledge!? This is dumb!

Alright, fine. Let's just assume one day it will be useful. Why aren't I learning how to protect myself first?! What will I do if I face a monster? Try my hand at the forbidden Jutsu?

I could try, but I don't have the deep soothing voice required. Actually, it is the first time I am actually thinking about this voice of mine. If I had to describe it I would say, young man. Not too deep, but also too deep to cross-dress. That kind.

This means that all that knowledge is useless to the current me. Will I ever need to use that? Perhaps. Likely not soon, however. And it is damn annoying.

The feeling of working hard to learn something is nice. That only applies when it is something you care about. I guess it could also work if your teacher is a Milf …or a Dilf for some. Being forced to learn is counterproductive.

That is what I always believed anyway. Better learn something both useful and that you care about. This way you can spend most of your energy on that activity without burning yourself.

And thus, I learn, and I struggle. All for my goal. A beautiful goal. At some point, the ghost says that I have progressed nicely. Something about reaching the beginner level again.

Apparently, I still have some stuff to learn, however. Lots and lots. How long will I be stuck here? Perhaps until Yggdrasil awakens. I truly hope it will be over soon.

Now starts the real training. In the morning we practice swordsmanship. For that, we use wooden sticks. Keeping track of the score is pretty easy. Whenever a stick pierces my body, I know I've been hit.

Right, a bit late but I do notice something. I don't bleed. There just seems to be some sort of sap that leaves my body. It's really weird. Then we start again after a short rest.

It is the same story again. Getting abused over and over. Somehow sparring does feel way better. No longer am I prey. I am simply a really unskilled opponent.

Even not being able to land a hit, I can still fight back. I guess if I had to describe the fight it would go something like:

SLASH

WOOSH

KABOOM

ULTIMATE HYPERRRRRR CROSS

OMEGA WORLD MEGA SUPER SLICE

END OF THE WORD SEVERING DEMONIC SWING

DISDAINING THE HEAVENS AND SCORNING THE HEAVENS AND EARTH SLASH

Or…actually, just me getting my ass kicked over and over, as usual. I mean as much as I want to make this epic... We are just fighting with sticks.

The highlight of the fight being when I turn into a shish kebab. Extra sap edition. I'm almost tempted to see if it tastes anything. That would be cannibalism with extra steps kinda.

Still, this body is strange, to say the least. I feel pain and somewhat bleed (kinda), but after a while I'm fine. That's definitely a plus.

Anyway, we keep fighting day after day. Over and over. I feel like I have used these exact words too much already. Oh well, training is meant to be repetitive. Also, very boring…and painful.

I guess this is why every good movie does a training montage. Could you imagine watching footage of a boxer training for months and years? There would be lots of raw efforts to be seen.

Title would be: Real man, real shit! Hear him grunt as he forces.

*AHHHH*

Then hear the plop from the toilet water. I mean we did say everything, right? It would also include that part. Perhaps even the sleeping, the eating, and the wanking parts. So yeah, that's why they do training montages. Should I also do one?

****(POV)

He is resisting surprisingly well. Staying conscious even against olden speech, an ability some ancient magical races have, we elves being one.

That already is in itself an achievement. But he is resisting MY olden speech. That is an exploit.

Seems he has figured out the secret. Keep one's mind busy and ignore the chatter.

We finally start the swordsmanship training too. He seems to have a lot of trouble. But I believe in him.

He'll figure it out for sure!