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To Die And Be Reborn Again

My cat passed away due to old age.

Technically, it was my father's cat. He took care of that sleazy little bean-toe no matter how many glass mugs that creature knocked off from the table.

But even though I rarely contribute to that cat's happiness and vice versa, I still felt this fervent grief creating a knot in my chest when we buried the cat in our backyard.

That was five years ago. I've turned 22 this year.

Strong and healthy; the nectar of youth~ Will I also enter the maw of death when time has stopped moving its hands for me? Or will the world take me out earlier than the ruler of everything?

The grief and proverbial thought aside, I still found the concept of 'pet' intriguing.

To keep another lesser living being alive despite the inconvenience it brings.

I too, want to experience such joy and passion for little things.

"GYAAAAAAH! I DARNED OVERSLEPT!!"

And that's why I chose to become my own cat.

The little creature to take care and keep alive more than my own mental wellbeing.

That's how it goes with pets, right?

"... Right." I checked my alarm one more time with irritation curling up my lips. "Something is wrong with this clock, I can feel it…

"Nevermind, I'm the 'something' that is wrong, heh." With the happy realization I brought to the sheets, my brain's immediate urge was to return to sleep. "I have done all of my commissions, and today's meeting convention has been delayed for another day, nyahaahah~!"

I closed my eyes shut, thinking of what dream I would have next, but my mind soon jerked back to a full carousel motion.

A little fun fact of mine, I can't sleep back once I've awoken.

"... 07:02, huh? Mmm… Not really a bad time to start the day, I guess."

I stretched my stiff muscles like an amateur chef with their pasta dough, before commencing my daily self-maintenance and hygiene control for the morning.

Arduous phases of hair and skin-care treatment were commenced until an hour finally passed by.

Still being a half burrito with a towel on my waist, my feet waltzed through the majority of my floor and onto the front of my standing mirror.

Glamor, shine, and pose! The mirror reflected the most beautiful and important thing in my life—me!

Those wise people around the world would always say to treasure yourself like a shrine under the sunshine of your mind, and I did just that!

Just a little bit more passionately!

If I were to describe the person beyond the mirror world, it would be as follows:

A wonderfully petite man of average height, possessing an incredibly beauteous, delicate, and youthful charming face—forcing passersby to latch and second guess their very first gaze~!

This man possessed a lean and slender yet well toned physique. A smooth, soft and glistening skin under the lamp light of any room and hall. Aside from the head, there was a great absence of hair on every body part.

And for the toppings, a short shaggy natural blond with overgrown bangs that made him feel as confident as if wearing a face mask all the time! —Despite taking him more than a month to get used to the barely visible sights his eyes would perceive through the tiny gaps in the drapes of those hairs…

I shot a finger gun at the hunk beyond the mirror, flirting promiscuously like a hunter in a cabaret.

"A great way to start the day once again, partner~!"

This gorgeous man bore the name of Occam Chariot.

And he loved every inch of his own existence more than anything in this world.

"... Yeah, I really need to stop myself from looking in the mirror for a long time, huehuehue." With my will to live replenished to 100% just now, I took away my glance from the mirror into my smartphone on the table, picking it up and immersing myself with it.

Back in highschool, I'm the kind of person most people often call an 'obnoxious weirdo', an 'enigma', and many other derogatory titles that were placed on my head like a wreath of thorns. But heh, despite the initial impressions I got, I graduated with more contact numbers and human connections than the perfect grades on all of the exams I've taken.

Then again, I wasn't really born with this confidence. I often heard it from my parents that my information processing capacity originally leaned more towards the autism spectrum.

Until an incident happened.

A rebar pierced my head? Or so I heard. I still couldn't believe that I'm still alive after hearing that. At the same time, the operation resulted in a miraculous success and a drastic change to my cognitive and mental behavior, albeit still possessing the same state of neurodivergent.

I was reborn, as if I've become a new person…

An insufferable weirdo, most precisely.

Though I might be weird, I work hard at weaponizing that weirdness to make myself accepted by everyone.

I've weaponized my helpless spite, becoming a normal human in return.

"Right'o, I still need to claim the trade asset."

While I lived in a country far apart from my family, I already possessed a plot of land and enough wealth to maintain this solitary bliss of independent odyssey.

That's right, I'm a highly-functioning and successful member of society despite my eccentric upbringings!

In no particular order regarding my achievement; I developed a paid-to-use software, won many big gigs in the entertainment world, and joined all kinds of community gatherings as a cosplayer for a variety of characters––

What with the weird last statement? That is, of course, a simple case—I wanted to humbly share my heavenly existence with other fellow human beings! The barrier of genders is only a triviality within this pilgrimage of mine~!

As such, social contact is a must! And not any social contact, the one where they couldn't help but admire my form in all angles!

Though I did modeling, it lacked the novelty that cosplay possessed. So I stopped doing those.

"Hmm?"

Out of thousands of private messages I ignored, one of the familiar bunch appeared in my notifications.

TommyTom, @TommyTommery.

22 October 2026, 08:27 AM.

"Sorry to bother you at this time, Cam, but are you available on November 7th and three days onward?" TommyTom, today at 08:27 AM.

My eyes squinted before my fingers skimmed over the keyboard. I decided to amuse this acquaintance of mine while I'm doing my stuff.

"What's the cookie?" CCami, today at 08:27 AM.

"Some of our folks can't arrive for the Grimscar Team's 6th Anniversary Night. They asked me to file with some of the people I know." TommyTom, today at 08:29 AM.

"Srsly!??? Tommy ma man, I know that you're a credible person, but not credible enough for Grimscar to hire your ass." CCami, today at 08:32 AM.

"Give me some credit, will ya? So how is it, yes or no?" TommyTom, today at 08:41 AM.

"You're affirming one of Grimscar's sugar daddies for it?" CCami, today at 08:44 AM.

"You're a busy existence, Cam. And no, wasting your money on fictional characters doesn't make you a sugar daddy." TommyTom, today at 08:47 AM.

"Well then. Quite the contrary, actually. I'm quite the free person." I typed while my barely visible eyes were latched onto the new chapters notification of the webcomic I followed. "Though, don't GS usually just get their staff for the cosplay of their character?"

"That's before they hit ten million sales on Phantasmal Sword 7." TommyTom, today at 08:48 AM.

"When the riches entices you, huh. Any hint on what character I'll get? I might go to the workshop today and pre-schedule them early." CCami, today at 08:49 AM.

"Can't tell, but there will be many sessions. I'll get you in contact with the planner and see what kind of gender they want you for the day, lol." TommyTom, today at 08:51 AM.

"Just don't make me attach those fake boobs or muscles like before. Such an act greatly downplayed my natural charm." CCami, today at 08:52 AM.

"What shroom are you on about?" TommyTom, Today at 08:52 AM. "Anyway, the main entendre of the event will be the cast in Phantasmal Sword 7. And with your history and popularity, they'll either pick you to be the MC, Keith, or Maiyn Lancas- whatever, that rich girl with twin drills. I don't bother remembering her deal in the story."

"You still hate the 'ojousama' stereotype?" CCami, today at 08:54 AM

"That is that, and this is this.." TommyTom, today at 08:54 AM

It took some intensive dedication and money to maintain my current lifestyle, along with this worshipable appearance. While my perfectly androgynous face was the byproduct of the genetic lottery, in the end, it still took a lot of care and resources to make it shine as it was supposed to.

As a result, I've become quite the well-sought model for fashion magazines and character cosplays alike, even becoming an actor at some point of my life.

I got kicked out by my last manager though.

On another note, I can say that I'm pretty good at disguise and impersonation!

Maybe I'll try becoming an agent or something that involves espionage or infiltrating somewhere in the future? Being a fulltime cosplayer hobbyist is good and all, but things had been really taking a slow burn for the past months.

The excitement wasn't the same anymore.

"That aside, have you checked the new series from Gondaira-sensei!?" My thumb weaved across the digital keyboard.

At this time, I thought I heard a series of muffled yet sharp and loud noises, as if there was someone shooting a gun with a suppressor outside of my house. I didn't really hear them clearly either, as my ears were already plugged with earphones.

I had my suspicions, but it wasn't enough to shift my attention.

Well, I spent my time perusing the latest trends and news and dealing with many other online representatives about business deals and schedules in the future. Simultaneously, chatting with Tommy about all sorts of topics regarding the latest reading media.

Mainly in the Fantasy genre, the more popular and modern stuff! Tropes like Isekai, Reincarnation, Magic, Transmigration, Regression, and all sorts of brain popping, dopamine inducing, high junkies available on the big 'W' of the World-Wide Web of internet!

It would be an understatement if I said that I prefer fantasy stories over anything else—I absolutely can't live without being fed a spoonful of them every day!

Of course, I bear no radical values nor mindset about the world being the boring capitalism simulation as it is, but it would be utterly stodgy if fiction were too grounded on close aspects of our realities like the majority of content under the rest of the storytelling genre.

Sci-fi? Very much interesting, but they are either putting too much effort on making their made-up theory as believable or not even trying at all. Both sides of the spectrum are equally as annoying. Afterall, I like my science as much as I like to daydream my hours away.

Horror? I actually like one where it took place in a fantasy setting. But if it's standalone, I would just need to stop doing my skincare routine for a week and see my face in the mirror.

Romance? If the main protagonist is me and the female lead is also me, I might read it! As a sub-genre for fantasy stories though? I gave it a pass.

I also don't prefer talking about non-fiction books and the like. While they were significantly better in terms of writing quality, and they often enlighten you with knowledge and wisdom of the past from time to time, I'll still reach out onto something within the flavor of my liking.

Not that I don't outright read them.

But Fantasy stories are just the right umami of hope and amusement for me. An idea to hold onto, and the unrecruited trust that one should believe into. A fulfilling, yet addicting cheesy bites to get every now and then.

Sometimes, I'm downright hoping that I could directly experience one of those adventures…

Then again, maybe it was naive to wish for the things within the confine of a book to appear in real life, but isn't that what it means to fantasize?

But if one day, those things would be real…

I for one, would like to be born anew with a 'System'! After all, who even wants to live a life full of challenge and strive?

Don't know what a system is? Then let me explain it in a jiffy~! A system is a-

"GAH!!?"

The suppressed gunshot reverberated its screech through the canals of my ears along with the impact it made to the outer wall of my room, which immediately converted into my dimmed shriek. My senses were alerted, and it quickly led me to a wall that was facing to the front of my house.

I saw quite a dent on the wall, to an extent of a noticeable blooming gap.

What the-

It came from below—the street outside, considering that my room was on the second floor with a single window facing to the front of the house— which was amazing!

I'm sure that my baseball-court-long front yard would be enough to lower the chance of stray bullets hitting my house when two sides of the opposition were having a gang fight on the street.

With the size of the dent and the length of the trajectory of my front yard—taking into account that they were not inside my front yard—the firepower seemed to be that of a handgun… Nevermind, I actually don't have the darndest clue.

I'm not a gun expert myself, obviously. I'm a different kind of nerd, and the state of firearms was not something I actively emblazoned on the internet.

Just who in the actual aether pulled a gun's trigger this early in the morning anyway!?

Gah! Now there were more of those gunshots fired outside. Did they hear me devaluing them or something!?

I seriously didn't remember a single armed thug nor a gang war here when I went outside to buy groceries. Lest this was a robbery in broad daylight scenery.

"This… this is damaging to my property! I can sue them!" With the phone set on camera in hand, I rushed to the window.

The residential plot of land that I possessed was already sandwiched with many with the same deal as me. Because of that, this area was quite filled with people who want nothing but to mind their business.

It was not a very well known area with many people coming either, which was a good thing to deter stalkers and harassers alike. Or atleast, differentiate them from normal people.

"Yeah, I'll show them the power of having an attorney!"

Cautiously, I blazed forward before hugging onto the wall beside the window, while slowly peeking my sun-blinded eyes into view.

"Urgh, maybe the light in my room is a little bit too dim compared to the outside. I should change the lightbulb after this."

From the moment I lightly swiped the curtains, another eruptive bang blew through the wind.

And it hit the window, alongside the forehead of my skull.

"Aaah."

The shattered glass fluttered in cacophony. A sharpened bullet painted my veils red as the last image I witnessed was of the dimming light within my claustrophobic room.

Due to my eyes still unused to the brightness of the outside, I didn't discern anything enlightening on the outside.

And then the final sensation; my body hitting the floor of my prestigious home…

I—definitely underestimated how fickle a life can be.

It made me wonder, in a situation of a cat who chased a bird across the street and got run over by a car, who deserved to be blamed?

Was it the cat who acted on their instinct?

Was it the car owner who drove normally?

Or was it the owner of the cat who should be held responsible for not preventing that from happening?

Despite the bizarre unlikeliness, I really should be more careful. I'm still a normal being afterall. My skin was not that of steel, nor I could shoot a laser from my eyes.

Though, I couldn't really help but think that—maybe I was their target all along.

However, none of that mattered anymore. All I knew was that a bullet to the head was enough to take all of my nine lives in one go. Either that, or the nine chances I got had already been depleted and I didn't notice it at all.

Well, I also didn't mention that I had a lot of enemies as much as I have friends and kind coworkers.

Those who wanted to see me dead and spit on my grave, stomping their soles on the soil until it's foul and paved.

Now that the cat was out of the bag, it was safe to state that…

It's impossible to be accepted by everyone.

Just before I thought that the void would soon consume me in its entirety, my consciousness went to somewhere vague, unrecognizable, and serene?

My mind seemed to be cleansed of any mortal bind, yet the weight that burdened my chest from the moment I was born was still there, clinging onto my exposed soul.

Within that unknown space, I saw a quasar of light, burning and enveloping everything with its warm and gentle light.

On the opposite side, I saw a long, arduously looking bridge that was supported with nothing but dark flesh and gritty bones. The bridge itself however, was deceptively pure and devoid of all impurity.

A torch appeared in front of me.

As if I was urged by instinct, I reached out for the torch.

I don't know how and why, but I grabbed this unknown torch by the stem––

And burn the vile bridge down to the void, before turning around and giving myself to the light.

Occam Chariot, the protagonist of the story, dying once again.

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