1 dérive

  i fell in love.

   i fell in love with your eyebrows and i fell in love with your beauty marks. with each day passing, i fell in love more and more with your eyes and your rose petal cheeks.

  i fell and feel in love.

   i called you pretty so many times... when i saw my reflection through your soul's eyes, when you spoke to me and jokingly made sure if i still love you. and to this day, i still do: i fell and fall in love with you countless times a day.

   no other human being could ever be able to encapsulate the tingling feeling and solid thoughts i have for you— i think i'm constantly flying around you, somehow trying to reach you, to catch you... but i still don't know which one of us has to be caught. 

   i don't know if vulnerability has ever felt better than this. i'm trying to seek help by myself, from myself as i'm watching you slip away, but there is just one thing that's crossing my mind every day, today, at 11:36 pm.

are you truly letting yourself slip away from me?

are you letting your thoughts of me fall off  from your brain as you try to breathe?

   i've always known how to answer questions logically, often spiritually, but now i can't picture myself answering thi— wait. let me rephrase that.

   i can't picture myself answering something that's supposed to be dripping from your own perspective, because after all that's what i tend to admire the most: the fact that we're opposites by mind, but acquaintances by heart.

   we can't merge the thoughts that we have outside themselves, and that's not cruel. there has to be individuality, the similarities have to restrict themselves to some extent. sometimes i'm okay with it, sometimes i'm not.

   well, i would just be asking you today if there's something that had changed, but my thoughts are putting me back to sleep. i hope i'll get the chance to tell you again how your beauty wraps itself around my existence, remaining through all eternity.