16 Jogja

The clothes have been changed, the hair is also half dry. A cup of warm sweet tea served on the nightstand. With a body wrapped in a thick blanket, Laras could only stare blankly at the window which revealed a view of the rain from outside.

Thanks to Nindy who prepared all this for her. If it wasn't for Nindy, maybe Laras would still be sitting woefully crying in front of Randi's house.

"How? Are you still dizzy?" Nindy came, with a bowl of chicken porridge in her hand.

"No, thanks." That's all Laras can say. It's nothing, it's just that he doesn't seem to have the energy to even speak.

"You don't just have to be alone, you have to be with me all the time."

Laras opened her mouth when Nindy took a spoonful of porridge. Bitter, of course. Laras should still be in the hospital. But because of Yuni, she had to swallow another bitter pill by coming back to Randi's house.

Half of the porridge portion was finished. Laras shook her head, unable to swallow the watery object into his mouth. "Already."

Nindy looked at Laras with pity. She had never thought before that her best friend, who was always treated like a queen by her boyfriend, ended up as pathetic as a body without a soul. Nindy was curious, how could Laras just give up her chastity to Randi?

It's not that Nindy thought Randi was irresponsible despite the man's always gentle treatment. But now see? Where was he when Laras was rocked alone? Even though the root of the problem was her, but that damn guy ran away and moved house?

"I can't understand Randi's thoughts. How can he just leave with your condition, which can't be said to be fine." Nindy spoke.

"I don't know what to do either." Laras spoke slowly. Her head was dizzy, her eyes hurt from crying too much.

"You want me to find him?" Laras shook her head. "No, he won't want to take responsibility."

"How come you gave up like this? So what about your child? Do you want him to be born without a father?"

Laras was silent before saying something that made Nindy stunned to hear it. "I didn't even want him to be born."

***

The night seemed dim, with the light from the moonlight illuminating the dark surface of the earth. In the bamboo hall, in front of a classic-style house, Randi sat alone, only accompanied by a cup of coffee which was starting to cool down because he hadn't drunk it for a long time.

His favorite brewed coffee, made by grandmother. Now his attention to Randi is no longer big, because the man's mind is full. Full and cloudy with a name that has been spinning ever since he came here.

Randi decided to move, both his house and his place of study. Jogja is also a simple life in it, maybe it will be a new atmosphere that Randi will meet when he first opens his eyes when he wakes up. There is no longer a sound of silence in the morning, because the grandfather who always plays random music from his old radio. No more thick smoke from the vehicle when he crossed the road to campus. There will only be warm greetings from the natives there.

"Eh, Randi? You're playing, aren't you?"

"Randi isn't in college? Oh, or is he on vacation, huh?"

"Wow! More handsome poll. Haven't been home in a long time, Mas?"

That's roughly the contents of the greeting.

"You're so handsome."

"Why did you cut your hair? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Have you had breakfast yet? Go to the cafeteria, shall we?"

Randi would no longer hear the basic and routine questions that Laras always asked him. Because, when Randi said 'yes', to his father's question, it meant that Randi agreed that his relationship with Laras ended without saying goodbye.

Never mind saying goodbye, Randi never said sorry to the woman. In fact, he is the main root of the problems that Laras is experiencing. But selfishly, Randi chose to run. The responsibility he should have taken by marrying Laras and raising their child will never be fulfilled.

"I know that you still love him. But, Randi, your future is the hope of many people. Don't disappoint our big family by marrying that girl."

"But, Yah, Laras is like that because of me. There's no way I can just take responsibility for it. Didn't dad always teach me to always be responsible for what I did?"

"Indeed."

"Then why are you now telling me to go and look after her? Isn't that just what a coward would do?"

The man in the black suit sighed, his hand reached out to hug his wife's shoulder, who was still sobbing a little. "Just this once, being cowardly isn't a big deal."

That's it, Randi finally ended up here. Neither grandmother nor grandfather knew anything about Laras. Because the elderly couple only knew, Randi was a good child who always thought about education. Without even being interested in a romantic relationship.

"You know this is hard, but what can you do? This is a risk, Randi. Do you want to disappoint Laras, or do you want to disappoint our whole family?"

Mother's question is still ringing in my head. A piercing question he was forced to answer with a big lie. Frankly, Randi wants to be in charge of Laras. Married to that woman, even though they were in college. If the family doesn't want everyone to know, Laras can apply for leave until she gives birth. But, what can you do, Randi is a man who never argues against family rules. Although sometimes he himself becomes a victim, it's okay. As long as they are all satisfied, matters of the heart and pleasure can come later.

"All the way from Jakarta here just to see the stars." Randi turned his head to find a grandmother with a mukenah covering her body.

"Grandma from the mosque?" Randi ignores Dadi's reprimand.

"Yeah, unlike you, always delay praying." Randi smiled bitterly.

"What's important is that it's done, it doesn't have to be on time, right?"

"It's okay, as long as you don't leave your obligations. That's a big sin." Randi felt a soft caress on the top of his head. "Grandma go inside first."

Abandoning one's obligations is a great sin. That is, Randi has been slashed from the list of prospective residents of heaven because he has neglected a big obligation. Leaving her alone without saying goodbye, sorry or even accountability.

Mom and Dad are still living in Jakarta. They just moved house, away from the complex so that no one could detect their whereabouts. But, no matter how well we cover the carcass, it will smell good in the end, right?

Someday, Laras will be able to find him here. Give either a slap or a hard kick as an outlet. On that day, Randi promised to hug Laras as tightly as possible. Expressing his deepest apologies and love to the woman. Although Randi is not sure Laras will accept it, but Randi will still wait for that day to come.

"Ras, I'm waiting for a slap from you."